STUFF I BET YOU'VE NEVER SEEN BEFORE

T+ TISSOT, INDEED!

This is a real functioning universal remote pillow...

When 'Spare' and 'Spare' mean two entirely different things...

And in the 'I'm sure his momma is proud' department...

It was stated that this is a "well" in Antarctica where the Russian scientists can get fresh water. Go figure.

I WANT!!!!

TRUE: This is the first ever Apple computer that Steve Jobs sold from his parents' garage. It sold for $666.66, but is expected to fetch $242,000 at auction.

I have no fucking idea what this is about...but knew you would like it.

Can you identify the Greek among the Muslims?

TRUE: Fourteen years ago, this guy developed a bad case of dermatitis, so he self-medicated with colloidal silver which turn his face blue. I saw an interview with him on the Today Show and he stated that even with the coloration problem, he is still using his invented cure. His wife seemed cool with it, saying she was used to it.

TRUE: This is a TSA agent's screen saver...

Holy fucking shit, ya'll!!!

WTF?

It was stated that she was not one of his favorite aunts...

Jeeeeeeez.....

I wonder if he cursed when this happened...

Someone please explain this to me...

Major design flaw...

 HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!

One of my very own...

WOMEN WHO LOOK LIKE SLUTS, BUT PROBABLY AREN'T...

 Recognize the girl on the right? Check this out...

Yep, that's really her.

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FAMOUS PEOPLE AND STUFF LIKE THAT

(read the sign, Harold, read the sign)

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A cop stopped me the other night a 1 am and asked me where I was going.

"I'm on the way to listen to a lecture about the effects of alcohol and drug abuse on the human body," I said.

He asked, "Really? And who's going to give a lecture at this time of night?"

"My wife," I replied.

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Pretty cool costume...

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I keep walking outside with my laptop and I still can't see myself on Google Earth! I know this is my house for sure on Google Maps, but it's not showing me when I go outside. I even typed in my address. What's up with that?

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road?

G-force.

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#21, fourth from the left. Who is he? Highlight between brackets below.

 [ SEAN CONNERY ]

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I found out my wife has OCD. When she touches something with one hand she has to touch it with the other hand or she freaks out. After she brushed my face with the back of her hand, I tackled her to the floor, held her down, and laughed at her while she panicked and tried to touch me with the other hand.

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Do Customer Service Reps keep us on hold just to see how much we'll take?

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John Lennon....signing his life away...

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Steve Irwin died the same way he lived...with animals in his heart.

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With friends like these....

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If you were a hot dog, and you were starving, would you eat yourself?
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If you don't like where you are, then move. You are not a tree.

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When I was in college a young woman was complaining to me that she had flunked a class, concluding with "Yeah, and I fucked him, too." That was one of the saddest things I have ever heard.
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Mattresses?!?.....jeeeeeeeez...

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Why can't I poop like everybody else? I only go about ever month or so. My wife gives me all kinds of vitamins and stuff, but...
If you doubt me I kept a journal: June 12, July 24, August 21, Sept 17, and Oct 11. Any suggestions?
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This photo is not staged. These two guys got there early to get just the right spot to be photographed with dozens of stars.

One of my very own....

WOMEN WHO LOOK LIKE SLUTS, BUT PROBABLY AREN'T...

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