RANDOM SHIT I'VE BEEN SENT

I've been sent some pretty good stuff in the last few days and feel the need to share, since right this minute I have nothing better to do, unless you want me to go play with the kids in the motel pool out by the highway...NOT!

When I say "pretty good stuff", don't automatically think funny. Funny is good. Provocative is better. (remember that you can click the image to enlarge)

???...

Never, EVER, give up your height advantage...

You want cool? This motherfucker wrote the book on cool...and I mean that... He may have aged into a nutcase, but when he was on, he was the best. He was so cool, when he unzipped his pants the furnace kicked on.

This electric motorcycle will go 140 mph, which is 14x faster than I feel safe on a motorcycle.

This is rum under a microscope...I don't know which of these colors makes you take off your panties...but I would guess the lime green dildo shape on the left... I'm thinking about pimping my ride and here are the two choices I've boiled it down to...

There are crowd-raftings like this all over the world at most major events. I've seen several. It looks like fun...

This was done with countless Rubik Cubes...

One of my very own...

Virginity notwithstanding, free wine has a powerful allure...

My own opinion is, if the son of god had just kept giving away free wine to anyone who wanted it, then we would have long ago had a one world religion.

Cure a leper? (yawn)

Raise some dead guy nobody ever heard of? (who cares)

Free catering for every party I ever want to throw for the rest of my life? SIGN MY ASS UP!!!! And when I got to heaven, don't hand me a fucking harp. I want a cardboard box of Chardonnay with a fucking spigot. And it needs to be about as big as the Sears Tower and there needs to be a little button on the side that reads AUTO-FUCKING-MATIC REFILL.

_______________________________________