Hell, yeah!

*****

DOPPLEGANGERS

It is said that everyone has a double somewhere. Well, I have found my wife's. I came across this photo some damn place on line and couldn't believe that the woman on the far left was not my wife. I thought it was one of her funky fundraisers, but no.

She thought I had photoshopped her in, until she realized I don't know shit about photoshop.

SEE?

A while back my wife brought a magazine back with her from New York. For you people that don't know me, I must tell you that this person is my twin...when I was younger. He even parts his hair on the right like I do. I still have a handlebar mustache, but don't take the time to wax it any more.

And that the word "denim" is on the cover is just too fucking weird, since I wear nothing but denim....every fucking day.

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JOKE OF THE DAY

Two guys hired a helicopter to fly them deep into the wilds of Alaska for a little moose hunting. When it returned a week later, the pilot asked how they did.

"Great! We got six!"

The pilot said, "Well, I have some bad news. The helicopter is only rated for four moose."

"Heck, man, last year a helicopter just like this one lifted right off with all six moose."

So they strapped on all six moose and headed over the mountains, but due to the extra weight couldn't make it and crashed.

The first hunter said, "We are lucky to survive."

The second hunter said, "Yeah, but I don't know where we are."

The first hunter said, "I think it's where we crashed last year."

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ANIMALS THAT AMUSE ME

Beautiful photo this...

I wrote a children's book about dolphins one time. It required a whole bunch of research and I found out that they can send out sound waves which enables it to, more or less, look right inside your body...meaning, they know who is and who is not with child.

Try to learn something new everyday.

 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Goddamn that's funny. If you didn't laugh out loud...look at it again.

*****

KIM JONG IL

 This man is lampooned more than anyone on the internet. Michael Jackson, Tiger Woods, etc, may come and go, but this lunatic has staying power.

 That he has control of nuclear weapons only makes him funnier...in a very odd sort of way.

 The man has is own "Love Brigade" made up of women whose sole purpose in life is to make him happy. Do you know how many a brigade is? Neither do I, but I bet it's a lot.

And now his son, aged mid-twenties, will have his finger on the button.

Drink up friends...there ain't a damn thing we can do about it.....why? Because our army is tied up trying to turn a medieval society into a real county.  Good luck with that.

*****

ARTIST OF THE DAY

Helmut Smits is a Dutch artist that fucks with people's heads.

In this first one he put a sign in a parking garage and documented how many people followed the instructions.  It turns out that Americans aren't the only lemmings on the planet.

He did this one to see how many people would make a "gag" photo from the set he erected depicting one of the most unfunny things in modern times.

 He did this, too, but unless you have multiple degrees in this sort of thing you will miss it's meaning.....

*****

TRUE FACT OF THE DAY

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SHIT I FOUND JUST FUCKING HILARIOUS

This has got to be in Asia. Had this guy done this on an American subway, a young man by the name of Tyrone would have introduced himself before he could scream "Please use a condom".

 Speaking of such things...

 I know that some people have a lot of respect for this coke snorting, draft dodging, drunk who found Jesus in rehab....but I have my issues with him.

 Speaking of such...

*****

WORDS OF INSPIRATION

Only boring people are bored.


People like you are the reason people like me have middle fingers.


I really enjoy self-defecating humor.


Acid Flashbacks: The origin of most of today's children's shows.


Trickle Down Economy: A rising tide lifts all yachts. 


I embarrass easily...........sober.

*****

One of my very own...

*****

THE HISTORY OF WOMEN WHO LOOK LIKE SLUTS, BUT PROBABLY AREN'T

This was created by the same people who answer our calls about setting up our computer and such. I say they have missed their natural calling. I say fuck that shit...I WANT TO KNOW ABOUT THIS SHIT.....I MEAN DAMN!!!!

 The first camera hadn't even been patented yet before it was used for this sort of thing. This one dates to 1878, and I don't want to sound....old, but that bitch is hot!

 I can imagine our ancestors scratching shit like this in the dirt and giggling.

 Nowadays I look out my trailer window and this is the best I can do....my wife and her sisters trying to out lactate one another. My wife won that day with 17' 6", a record that still stands.

 Family reunions aren't even that much fun anymore, what with everybody copping an attitude...

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