Most of these were created by just plain people who saw a picture and decided to write something on it. I like shit like that. Please enjoy...
SCARY BUT TRUE: Statistics show that everyone who has ever been to a Starbuck's will die.
How do you kill a retard?
Give him a knife and say "Who's special?"
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
How do you circumcise a redneck?
Kick his sister in the jaw.
Why are Jewish men circumcised?
Because Jewish women don't like anything that isn't 20% off.
ON TEACHING: A hundred years from now it will not matter what my bank account was, the sort of house I lived in, or the kind of car I drove....but the world may be different because I was important in the life of a child.
Yes, that IS what it's all about.
0 (zero): The number of days without a war somewhere on this planet since 2925 B.C.
My wife warned me if I got her one more stupid gift then she would burn it....so I got her a candle.
My bartender and I were discussing the dismal viewership of the Women's World Cup on TV. He suggested changing the rules to this: Every time a point is scored, the scored upon team must remove an article of clothing. Since they only wear four articles of clothing, things could get real interesting real quick.
Who needs rhetorical questions?
I love how in scary movies the person always yells out "Hello?", as if the killer is going to say "Yeah, I'm in the kitchen...want a sandwich?"
It's not a hangover...It's wine flu.
Toons of the day....
One of my very own....
WOMEN WHO ARE OLD NOW AND LOOKED LIKE SLUTS, BUT PROBABLY WEREN'T....
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