FOLIO OLIO: WHAT WERE THESE MOTHERFUCKERS THINKING?

A collection of people who made very bad decisions; didn't get enough hugs when they were growing up; and/or are just stupid or just selcouth souls.
(not that there's anything wrong with that)

You can't kill yourself by holding your breath...she knows...

Tomorrow: The greatest human labor saving devices.

Somebody had to decide about this ad placements....

TRUE: I finally got one of these in my email...

Hey, stupid, read the fucking newspapers....

Crossword Clue: Stole stuff
_ _ _
[ fur ]

Shit, when you have it all figured out, why not tell everybody?

The best place to hide a body is on page 2 of a computer terms of use agreement.

Look folks, I got nothing against people doing unusual shit to their bodies for attention, really. But besides understanding ones right to become one of kind, I'm also an artist and sometimes.....this time....the two clash....

Stoners: The only things that can get baked at room temperature.

For my dearest Abby....

When I say "hiking", I really mean "do a shit ton of drugs in the woods."

Egotist: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation...

TRUE: Pat Robertson just announced that oral sex between a husband and wife is not a sin.

But, he added, if you think it is a sin, then it is a sin.
We are all thankful that he cleared that up for us.

I posted this years ago, but I still think it speaks volumes...

You know who had straight parents?

Adolf Hitler.

This doesn't really fit in with this post, but I found it so fucking funny that I sent it out anyway....

People who believe "patience is a virtue" are the same people who think they are going to live forever. I wish these two happy souls all the time they need....except for her beard....or I guess it's a her.....

I gave blood today. Soon "I don't give a fuck" can course through their veins, too.

Just the headline......this one's for my buddy, Kent....

Sometimes I'm not sure if I eluded a hangover, or still drunk.

If you've got it, you might as well flaunt it....

I hope that your appalling St. Patrick's Day behavior doesn't end up in a massive viral video demanding that you be brought to justice.

Today I feel lazier than the guy who designed the Japanese flag.

Your neighbors have better stuff and, by god, it's up to you to do something about it!

Profanity makes talking fun!

(I will guarantee you that we pay her rent)

??????

Why would this man let a camera anywhere near this?

He kind of looks Mayan. Does he look like he knows exactly when the world will end?

I didn't make it to the gym today.
That makes 48 years in a row.

Pictures like this make me reconsider my stance on prohibition....

I just found an iPhone app that makes my face look fat. It's called "camera".

Go ahead, try to figure this out....I mean it. I did and got no where....

If you eat a person who has an infectious disease, will you get the disease too?

Well, I guess it all depends on your meaning of "eat".

On a scale of one to Pee Wee Herman, how immature are you?

To repeat, I really don't care if you wear a skirt and do your top like that, but don't expect me not to stare...

Now that I think about it, I think this guy lost a bet.

Intriguing image, this. I would guess one of those "Murder Parties" or some such distraction.....

"Can you fart so hard that your balls explode?"

Now, please go back and notice the blind guy next to the dumpster.

"Oh, hi, Martha. Have you done something different to....ah......your whole body?"

Dear Blonde Lady,
Fuck you.
Sincerely,
The world

Who decided to turn every bathroom in the world into a photo booth? I mean it? Are we all lemmings who simply follow the dictates of people we don't.....even.....know?

Money can't buy you happiness, but poverty can't buy you shit.....

The first thing men notice about a woman is her eyes. Then, when her eyes aren't looking, they notice her breasts.

(look again at the photograph he's holding)

Well, somebody has to lose at Musical Chairs....modern style.....but why is it always the fat chick?

You know you are a tad too weird when your fucking dog hides it's face from the camera.....

There is a Darwin principle in here someplace....

I actually like this. I mean that. How extraordinarily clever. I want him at my poker table...and if he didn't know how to play I would let him win just enough that he would want to come back....