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I'm an artist, educator, militant anti-theist , and I write. I gamble on just about anything. And I like beer...but I love my wife. This blog contains observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while.

Friday, May 25, 2012

Page 10




"Oh, I tried hitching a ride on a few wagons every now and again, but I still had to hold them eggs, don't you see, or else they would of broke.  What I really needed myself was a pushcart to haul the eggs in.  I knew a pushcart would be more easier and I could travel houses farther out.  But I didn't have no free money to spare to buy one, but Mr. Washington give me some powerful good advice.  I remember his exact words.  He said, Listen, boy, I don't want you turning into one of them fools who have to run out and buy whatever crops up in your head cause if you do that, you'll always be in need of money and always be filling egg money jars of other folk.  But he had a idea, he sure did.  Then he told me to make me my own pushcart if I needed one."  Jeremias laughed at the memory.  "Heck, I just stood there lookin' at him with my mouth open. He swore I could do it if I put my mind to it.  It was a fact that I could whittle pretty good, and he had him a old broken pushcart he would let me look at for measurements and such.  Then I set to work gatherin' metal here and there and swappin' eggs for it.  When I spoke about my doubts in my own abilities, Mr. Washington told me somethin' else and I have told each and every one of my own young'uns.  He said You gotta start sometime.  If you just go at it with certainty, then the job's half done.  Believe me, if more people had confidence, many a person who's running around begging now would be sitting pretty, with honestly earned riches.  Course, at the time I thought he was out of his mind.  Anyhow I worked all winter and by Spring I had me my own pushcart."
"Oh, and what a pushcart it was," said the wife with great pride in her voice.  "I remember it well.  He painted it up all red with yella stripes and everything that could be carved was carved and he always kept it clean and well greased.  When we first met I think it was that pushcart what I first fell in love with."
I laughed at the look on the old man's face.  The old woman looked at her husband who pretended to be riled by the remark, although, I sensed, he had heard her tell the story a thousand times.
"Oh," began Jeremias.  "I started out like a child tastin' somethin' he ain't never eat before, but like I said, by Spring the thing was done."
"I believe it took its maiden voyage on the Tuesday after Easter," she said.
"After that I never delivered no egg without her.  I was so proud of that pushcart I'll tell you, it would be hard for anyone to understand how I loved that thing.  If I had been offered a brand new Model T for that cart, I would of turned it down.  Everywhere I went people stopped to admire it.  Every time I stopped for a chat, I told everybody that cared to listen of the advantages of that cart over every other mode of transportation.  I told them how it rolled all by its ownself and that it was only going uphill that I had to help it along a bit.  One time one of them cooks told me she would not have believed that I was so clever and if she ever needed a cart, I would have to make her one.  From then on, that cook what said that was given two very special double-yolked eggs each and every week."
"This young lady don't want to hear about you and them cooks, Jeremias."
"Well, heck fire, them cooks washed themselves every week and some even washed their hair on weekdays."
The old woman added wittily, "Well, there weren't too many of them around back then now were they."



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