ADVENTURER’S LOG: EARTH CYCLE 13 - FRIDAY #1697

PENDELSON, OREGON
(we drove straight through Washington
and only stopped once)

And what, you may ask, is in Pendelson, Oregon?

The Rainbow Cafe, of course.
We would go eat there, but tonight it's closed for cleaning. The whole town is abuzz that it is reopening tomorrow. It's been in continuous operation since.....ready.....1883.
My fucking body can't even stay in continuous operation since only 1946 for fuck's sake!

My wife got fed up with the interstate and fancy motels. We like motels where you have to jiggle the handle on the commode to get it to stop running, just like back home. Anyway, she worked out a backroad (or more accurately a serious of back roads) to get us where we're going. As you can see, Garmin didn't even know there was a road there. 

It was a great road and only cost us 30 minutes in ETA to our motel.

You can't imagine how much wheat there is out here. There is no way I can describe it to you...it's fucking everywhere.

I noticed that some of the fields had strange areas...

It looked like the wheat had been knocked over and at first I thought running water had done it. But then I noticed that it was on the side of hills, on the flatlands, etc.

 I finally concluded that it is harvest time and the weight of the grain just toppled some stalks.

 Beautiful...so beautify I decided to tag it...

 Sublime I think...

In case you're interested...

I found it interesting that these things were way out in the middle of nowhere. I thought they needed to be near the grid...

Finished this book today...well, we finished having it read to us. I strongly recommend it...

OBSERVATIONS:

Today my wife did something stupid and said, "Put that in your blog and smoke it!"

Last night we went to an expensive Italian Restaurant and asked the waiter if they served corn dogs. You should have seen the look on his face.

Think about this. You are driving your car at a snail's pace past an accident. You pull out your cell phone and click the wreck. A cop pulls you over for using you cell phone in the car. You explain that you wasn't using the phone, you were using the camera. That argument didn't work and he got a ticket. But if he had had a 35mm SLR, then he wouldn't have gotten a ticket.

We stopped to pee in a speck on the map, Dayton, Wash., and found a kid and his wife on their honeymoon. He had gotten his degree at USC and lived only blocks from me.

They are also in a band. This is they...

In Idaho they have signs like this:

Casino and Coin Laundry

Casino and Barber Shop

Casino and Coffee Shop

Casino and anything else you can imagine.

The only thing I can figure is that the license must be very cheap.

We are so far north that only white people work in all the fast food restaurants.

Do you remember the cattle guard I tagged a few days ago? Well while I was installing it a car stopped down on the road below me and backed up the ramp to where I was. While I was pondering what I would tell a government agent, the old woman asked me for directions.

And so much for needing a hoodie. A few days ago in some damn place it was 56 degrees, today it was 100 degrees when we went to eat.

Ever since the NSA scandal broke, my wife refuses to send me kinky photos.

They need to be very careful about shit like the above...the little boy who cried wolf syndrome.

When you cut a 12-hour Sudafed in half, do you only get 6 hours of sinus relief, or do you still get the full 12 hours, but only at half the strength?

(Believe it or not, I know the perfect person to answer that question. Bruce, the ball is in your court)

Did you know you can fix a scratched DVD with a banana?

You keep using that word and I don't think it means what you think it means...

This looks very much like a rite of passage for boys where I grew up...

Candle rock near my hometown was like that; two towering rock with a space in between. You not only had to be big enough and strong enough to jump across....you gotta be brave enough.
It was on top of that rock that this happened.
My brother (four years my elder) and his friends were up there and me and my friends were hanging out with them. One of the guys said that somebody had been ruptured. I asked what ruptured was. I was told that if you are ruptured, you dick would never get hard, you couldn't have children, no girl would marry you and you might as well become a priest. I asked how you would know if you were ruptured and was told that if one of your balls hung lower than the other, then you were fucked.
Back in our "hideout" all my friends and I discovered we were ALL ruptured. 
I couldn't eat dinner and my mom made me tell her what was the matter. I cried when I told her. And somehow, she didn't laugh.

My dream job would be driving the karma bus.

Cast of Happy Days posing with John and Julian Lennon, 1974...

These young woman actually think he's a god. That sickens me...

I refuse to eat what I call "Snacks By Dow Chemical". Just read the labels on some of those BBQ chips and such.
Now read this:

Dicalcium phosphate diydrate

Sodium lauryl sulfate

Tetrasodium puyrophosphate

Sodium saccharin

Would you put that shit in your mouth....voluntarily?

Well, those are the ingredients in Colgate Toothpaste.

I learned that when I found myself taking a shit without reading material. 
And this?

Think of the absurdity..."NATURAL bacon FLAVORED"...flavored is another Dow Chemical code words for chemicals. "Simply Natural" my ass.

I think I am, therefore, I am. I think.



And your point is?

The main ingredient in hand sanitizer is paranoia.

There's a lot of shit like this on the internet. They, of course, missed the whole point of the argument...

So, you think doing this shows you are a man? Pity...

My level of sarcasm has reached the point where I don't even know if I'm kidding or not.

Maybe I don't really have an enlarged prostate. Maybe the rest of me is just shrinking.

Oops...

Doc Holiday's dental chair is up for sale...

From a pamphlet on surviving a bear attack...

This is worth the read...

"Fuck the college education out of her"...HAHAHAHA!

A married couple, one Jewish and one Christian, couldn't be buried in the same grave yard...

"Well, helloooo there, big fella."