TUESDAY #2088

NEWSY BITS...

I get so many people asking me what my Cerca Trova tattoo means, I want another tattoo on my other arm. I want it written in Latin that means “It is none of your business.” That way when they ask what it means, I can say….well, you know.

Any of you sons of bitches know how to write "It is none of your business" in Latin? I would be eternally grateful. Just leave it in comments.

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Of course he did...those scientists that came up with the miracle drug had nothing to do with it...

Doctor Who?

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(after all that crap, they haven't lost their sense of humor)

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US Army testing remote controlled armored vehicle delivered to battlefield by remote controlled helicopter...

C’est la fuckin’ vie.

How will slum dwellers make money if drugs are legalized?

 "So let me get this straight. You pour out perfectly good water to raise money for charity?"

"I'll have some of what she had." 

I thought that was her job. 

Like extinct song birds? Get more cats...

...and kill song birds...by instinct.

Brunch is just a socially acceptable excuse for day drinking.

Who thought it would be a good idea to say "At the point in time" instead of "now"?

You know when you fart in your morning shower and it smells like eggs and it makes you hungry for breakfast.

Elephant Rock in Heimaey, Iceland

 I wonder how long it took them to find out what an elephant looked like.

During WWII, you getting sick was a really big deal...

If I was a criminal, I would make my nickname…AKA, just to fuck with the wanted poster writer.

That is what nearly 20 years of nuke testing did to a patch of desert in Nevada.

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.

You know what irritates me? When people say, "Not to mention...", then go right ahead and mention it.

Like: "Not to mention Obama, but he...."

 India's Forgotten Stepwells...

Some tattoos are a resignation letter you send to society every day for the rest of your life.

How would have thought....

Everyone has a 2am and a 2pm personality.

With shit like this I would start flying again...

Of course, knowing my nature, you know I would have bets laid.

A whole bunch of kick ass democracy...

 Norfolk, VA.

 Guy in mugshot wearing a picture of his first mugshot on his T-shirt for his second mugshot......

People spent more money at a restaurant when the menus didn't show currency symbols (like $), or when prices were listed as whole numbers (without decimal places).

The official symbol for people with lisps.

Somebody busier than you is giving their family quality time right now.

Read the spoiler alert...

Great mistakes in English medieval architecture

81% of overweight boys and 71% of overweight girls incorrectly believed they were at a healthy weight.

Truth is stranger than fiction, if you don’t read much.

Mount Rushmore as you've never seen it.

When I walk into a new restaurant or bar, I can smell the fast internet signal.

Some people say, “I couldn’t make this stuff up” and they really mean it.

Goalie Camo, taking every advantage you can get.

If you make a woman laugh, you can make her do anything.

Turn on the news. It’s white history month…again.

Though we’re not sure what John the Baptist was thinking in this 15th century painting, most people don’t like being alone with their thoughts...think sheep.

“Don’t kid yourself” would be a great slogan for birth control pills.

Something you don't see everyday...

That last one looks like they are scoring a suicide dive...I mean, they ARE New Yorkers.

Now shut up, it’s my turn to talk…

I had forgotten about this scene...

Technically, we are all half centaur.

I once got kicked out of a bar for pouring a beer on myself, like that’s something a drunk person would do.

“You’re too young to determine your sexuality,” said no one to the heterosexual teenager.

A fish cannon to get migrating fish over the dam...

 One Of My Very Own...

Sometimes I’ll drive like 10 miles with the emergency brake on. That doesn’t say a lot for me, but it really doesn’t say a lot for my emergency brake.

AND THEN THERE'S THIS...

Sir Tim Berners-Lee invented the World Wide Web 25 years ago. So it’s worth a listen when he warns us: There’s a battle ahead. Eroding net neutrality, filter bubbles and centralizing corporate control all threaten the web’s wide-open spaces. It’s up to users to fight for the right to access and openness. The question is, What kind of web do we want?

Got 6 minutes to listen to this guy. Check this out...
http://www.ted.com/talks/tim_berners_lee_a_magna_carta_for_the_web?utm_source=newsletter_weekly_2014-08-23&utm_campaign=newsletter_weekly&utm_medium=email&utm_content=bottom_right_button