Woe, modern life...
And...
Archaeologists from Museum Lolland-Falster have found a
remarkably well-preserved axe with an intact shaft during their digs in
connection with the construction of the Femern Belt Fixed Link. The
narrow-necked flint axe is evaluated to be about 5,500 years old and was found
in what used to be the seabed during the Stone Age.
Due to "unique preservation conditions, we have found a lot of
organic material during the digs. We had also found several special items such
as an oar, two bows and 14 axe shafts."
(I don't know what unique preservation conditions" are)
A friend
of mine had to send his kid to counseling over his reaction to Sleeping
Beauty”…the “Corpse Bride.”
My wife
hasn’t eaten all day because she has the flue. I haven’t eaten all day because
my wife has the flu.
Brilliant!
I haven't posted one of these in a while...
I've also never understood parents teaching their children weird-ass name for their sexual organs. I taught mine vagina and penis and never regretted it....but, of course, I capitalized Penis.
Fuck
Plato.
A group of men watching a Home Depot demonstration of how to properly load a dishwasher...
I made that up and think it's pretty damn funny.
I’d like
to thank my teacher for defining the word “plethora” for me. It means a lot.
"I like them high and tight..."
Have you
ever noticed that girls who spend a lot of time with horses start to look like
horses?
Heart eating scene...
Japanese tire commercial...
I got
bitten by a gay guy this weekend. Nothing strange as happened yet, but on a
side note, I do feel fabulous.
My wife sent this to me...
“Pointless
Fact” backwards is “Tcaf Sseltniop.”
The
40,000-year-old mammoth, nicknamed "Buttercup," was found in
permafrost on the remote Siberian island of Maly Lyakhovsky. When scientists
cut into the carcass, its fresh-looking flesh oozed dark blood, raising hopes
that DNA could be extracted.
A real headline:
Plumber zapped on private parts before being impaled on
pipe says he now believes in God...
As good a reason as any other, I guess.
It worked on me...
9/11
jokes are never offensive. Use them often as they are hilarious to everyone.
How do I
know I live a boring life? I just had a full dream about me washing my own
truck, and it felt oddly satisfying.
One Of My Very Own...
It’s not
what you did that matters, it’s what you do now.
Looks kind of like OOMVO...
...even my kind of humor.
A couple of new studies of interest...
Just begging for photoshop...
Speaking of...
A fly in
your bong? Fuck it.
Shit you don't see every day...
One day's homeless public space shits to be exact.
I still find it odd that there are rules of what animals we can kill at will and animals who we protect with the rule of law.
Quality humor...it's like our motto here at Folio Olio...
Who put kale in the blunt. Serioulsy?
What could possibly go wrong....
I had a great friend who was the Assistant Secretary of Transportation during the Carter Administration and we talked a lot about highways...a subject that fascinates me...
People
say, “How can you laugh at a time like this?” And I say, “How could you not
laugh?”
More shit you don't see every day...
I was the
only kid in middle school with a black belt in masturbation.
This is that scene where Cameron Diaz fucks the windshield...
In Victorian times people didn’t call for the coroner
after a loved one died. THEY CALLED FOR THE PHOTOGRAPHER FIRST. Welcome to the
creepy yet fascinating world of Victorian Post Mortem photography – and, yes –
it’s EXACTLY what it sounds like:
This poor kid was propped up on a stand...
There is
nothing more disappointing that an otherwise nice person with no sense of
humor.
HAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAHHAHHA!
That "which" does not kill you will try again.
Parents,
it’s okay to say “no” to your children. They won’t explode. True story.
Amazing carved and painted wood sculptures from artist Tom Eckert.
You might want to Google that guy. He's amazing.
Suppose you work for a guy who is, say, an ultra-conservative and you want to give, say, $1,000 to a liberal candidate. But if he finds out, he could find grounds to fire you. Would you want to keep your contribution secret...just like your vote?
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