About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Monday, May 2, 2016

MONDAY #2689

One Of My Very Own…





ralph.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com



My good friend, Tommy, got his truck broken into. The cops said it looked like they were trying to steal it, since they damaged the ignition switch. His daughter sent me Tommy's solution.



By the way, a big diesel in that model truck makes it worth about what he paid for it new.

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If you look at the debt before Obama took office and after he took office, the debt went up $7.7 trillion on his watch. And he didn't even have to pay for two wars.

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Wife bought me this.



She knows me pretty well. I wore it in the bar for several long minutes and nobody noticed. That should tell you something.

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Finally got a Mail Packet returned in the manner it was designed to do. When all the way to Wyoming and back to my home, but one one packet does not a display make.



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The day his son denied being the Zodiac Killer.








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What if your dog just randomly said, "Nobody is going to believe you," and never spoke again.

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"Yo....Dawg!"



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Just remember this when you think that our government doesn't lie to us.



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I think we should all be reminded from time to time that this power is in the hands of the batshit craziest motherfucker the world has ever created in North Korea.



But I'll be ready because I practiced in school...



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Blind snake?



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Trains are just very boring roller coasters.

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Wait for it...





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This guy is pretty fucking cool...




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How day do dat?



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A Little Girl Wrote A Letter To God About Her Dead Dog







Disgruntled? You bet. That's the feeling I got when my packets were returned with snarky comments.

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Guy drives at a huge tornado and tornado moves out of his way.



How do you fuck up that badly and not pay for it?

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I think he might have broken his ankle.



And exactly how does he extricate himself?

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Yes, that is a giant cheese wheel used as a mixing bowl for hot noodles.



I'm not all that into pasta, but that looks good.

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J. D. Salinger, author of Catcher In The Rye.



When I used to write I would drive to a place that looked similar to an important scene in my book. There I could just look around, smell, listen, and it helped me very much.

But J.D. isn't all by himself. Somebody had to drive that other car and take the photo. Boy, would I like to know the details of that. And the cheap dime store flip flops is the perfect touch.

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This is not a prank. This is a cruel trick that demands retribution.



I would set that motherfucker's bed on fire while he was in it.

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When I ask my wife if I can order one more beer after she has already indicated that she is ready to go.



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Almost put this in the shit you don't see every day' file, but...



Speaking of such things...



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What a clever idea...



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Just another reason not to go to the gym...



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And we never thank them...



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And...



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Every parent I have ever known...



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How to piss off a surfer...



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No photo trick this, just a simple illusion...




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Look at that magnificent creature!


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A group has made experimental models of the universe in an attempt to understand the relationship between galaxies and how they form.



You can interact with it and change variables here : http://cosmicweb.barabasilab.com/viz/#1



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God only knows what would have happened if this thing had been let loose with only one side functional.



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The phrase 'Don't you dare' is actually 'Do not you dare' and that confuses me.

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3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm relieved to see that you have covered senders name and address this time. Even I was able to find out your real name and address last time...
If it weren't that far from here I'd like to come over for a beer and a chat though!

Cheers,
Burkhard

Ninja Grrrl said...

Same. What a party would that be, if we all showed up at his bar one day? No matter what happened next, it would be interesting.

Fardygardy said...

Theft-proofing that truck reminded me of my uncle when I was a kid. Someone broke into his home and stole the family console Television - you know, those huge wood box TVs that sat on the floor like a piece of furniture. Anyway, he was so pissed, when he bought a replacement, he took out his woodworking router and engraved "Property of (his name, complete with middle initial)" right into the top of the TV. It was awesome. no one stole that one.

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