About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Tuesday, January 24, 2017

TUESDAY #2956

One Of My Very Own...

That was awful. Give me another chance...
That is rather subtle. Think probation.

EMAIL: 


A few protest signs you may like...
And my favorite...

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I'm getting pretty damn sick of celebrity's opinions given more weight that the average citizen's...

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Someone, somewhere is busy making rules for tasteful ridicule...

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This guy is a real piece of work...
I have no idea what that means, but it seems funny.

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There are so many things to abhor, why make shit up?

Picking out one photo out of thousands to find condemnation is just petty.

Oh, no, he covered up the Lincoln Memorial!!!
No he didn't.

You don't have to do this unless they are playing the National Anthem.
They weren't playing the National Anthem.

Trump's cake looks like Obama's cake!!!
SO FUCKING WHAT?!?!

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This is what I try to explain to my wife.


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And this from elsewhere...
I'm all for it.


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Have you ever faked a seizure at a party just so you could go home early?


CLEVER CAPTIONS

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I would have worded the caption: "AGAIN?"

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Couldn't possibly have anything to do with the creepy fact that she keeps them all in the curio. 
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I talked to my kids about drugs. Found out my weed guy had been overcharging me for years.


Simple test I took concerning old words in English. This was my rating...


I think I'm just a good guesser.


I hope everyone doesn't get the same score like the internet version of a participation ribbon.

Anyway here's the link:


NOTABLE INDIVIDUALS

They make some pretty babies...

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This is Nils Bohlin. The inventor of the seat belt.
Oh, the lives he most surely saved.

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The flip-flops are the final touch of fierceness.

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What she lacks in looks she makeups for.

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Rosalia Lombardo was only two years old when she died from pneumonia in 1920. Her premature death left her father so heartbroken that he approached the noted embalmer, Alfredo Salafia, and asked him to preserve Rosalia’s body.

Visitors who come to see her in the catacombs swear that the little girl actually blinks here eyes. These sequence of pictures show her eyelids eerily opening and closing by a fraction of an inch.

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I trying not to take my dog's sighing personally.


IMAGES THAT SPEAK FOR THEMSELVES


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I found my perfect job.

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I used to assume most people were bright, kind, and at least somewhat informed. Then internet was invented.


THINGS I MIGHT NOT HAVE KNOWN ABOUT YESTERDAY

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Surfers, 1922.

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I found out how they do this...

After placing the air tight cube on the stand, you use a Shop Vac to suck out all the air from the top.

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100 Years Ago Someone Lost Their Coin Purse.

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Berlin's solidarity with the Israeli terror victims.

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[verification needed]

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Since the pharmacy keeps making it harder to buy decongestants, I've just started making them at home from crystal meth.


ADVICE YOU CAN TAKE OR LEAVE

I agree.

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Go to the pound and avoid birth defects of pure breeds, plus you shut down inhumane puppy mills. That what we in the pet business call a win/win.

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I've always hated the term Big Bang. To me it just sounds trivial and childish, like the guy that coined it up explained the singularity and its rapid expansion to his 3 years old daughter and she blurted out "Big bang, daddy, big bang." 

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What must the world think of us.

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That woman has the perfect grasp of relationships.

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I don't know what the cartoonist meant by that, but here's my take. If you tell me that I should do this or that because everybody else is, then I am automatically suspect. Being completely free of trends, fashion or fads is truly liberating. You might want to try it one day.

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I listened to a Ted Talk about the millennial generation what with the ribbons for everyone and parents demanding their kid be put in advanced classes and such. The guy was a college professor and said he even got calls from parents of his students to demand a change in grade. 
Pity that. But these are the same people who faint over seeing a Trump sign and want the language changed to pacify their sensibilities.

Speaking of such, is there an email list I can get on to be informed about what words I am allowed to use on any given day? I also need to know what words are perfect acceptable for one group but unacceptable for me to utter, write or think about. 

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(My wife was not surveyed.)

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Every person knows they, and they alone, are the only one capable of navigating a super market cart properly.

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This took me much longer than it should have.

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Way ahead of you, "cashless society."

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This deserves to be posted again. 

If you are on a phone and this is too small, it reads: Percentage of people who say it is "essential" to live in a democracy.
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LET'S JUST GET IT RIGHT OUT THERE ON THE TABLE WITH A LITTLE "THEY SAID - I SAID." 

You can't use he or she. You must use ze.
Fuck you.

We can say the N word but you can't.
Fuck you.

You can never assume someone's sexuality.
Fuck you.

You shouldn't say anything that upsets me.
Fuck you.

Animal life is just as important as human life.
Fuck you.

Eating meat is immoral.
Fuck you.

All (blanks) are (blank).
Fuck you.

God told me gays shouldn't marry.
Fuck you.

All world views have to be respected.
Fuck you.

May I talk to you about Jesus Christ?
Fuck you.

What's your sign?
Fuck you.

(With me, Fuck You is a term of endearment.)



8 comments:

Anonymous said...

So your point with the Brendan O'Neill post was that the people who voted to end America did so because they felt that America had ended?

Anonymous said...

Caitlyn Jenner is beautiful...

Ralph Henry said...

Of course he is.

Anonymous said...

Be better Ralph

Ralph Henry said...

I'm trying, but to make him Woman of the Year just made me laugh what with all the other deserving women out there who had worked their whole lives. And further, I loathe anybody associated with that tv show. So, that's the best I can do.

riley said...

I understand. I think she deserved woman of the year. Coming out as trans is already hard. Doing it while the whole world watched and you can get on folio olio and see your identity invalidated, doubly hard. I think she deserved it. Part of the reason I think she deserved it is you.

Spider Borland said...

"I'm getting pretty damn sick of celebrity's opinions given more weight that the average citizen's..."

*cough cough* DONALD TRUMP *cough cough*

Ninja Grrrl said...

I'm afraid I'm one of the people who disagree with you strongly about whether or not transgender women are women. You must understand what that costs a person, to live out an unpopular truth. It can get you killed. When those people talk and tell me what would make their lives easier, and it's just changing a pronoun, I'm gonna do it.

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