About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Monday, March 27, 2017

MONDAY #3018

One Of My Very Own...


Lollypop Lorry - I Won't Let You Go



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14 black females have just vanished in a span of two weeks. What is going on and why is this happening to black females in Washington DC? No one seems to know, and the media has absolutely no interest in finding out why either.

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This has been dubbed the Ghost Goal for very good reason.

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The contestants on the show try to complete a task with zero outside assistance or contact with the outside world for one year. But here’s the kicker. There were 23 contestants that started. 13 quit and 10 finished the show, only there was one small problem. By the time the 10 surviving contestants came back, the show had already been cancelled for 7 months. 

There’s a British reality show by the name of Eden that many of us have never heard of, and now never will.  It was Survivor type of show where contestants are left in a very remote spot in Scotland to fend for themselves.  Their task is to try and start this weird society, hence the title Eden.

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My wonderful wife had her head shaved to make money for her new friends.

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We all boo all pizza commercials when watching a game at Dano's.  And Sunday afternoon the place was packed for my Gamecocks attempt to get in the final four by beating our arch enemy Florida. We did and the place went, literally, wild.
In our Five Points area the fans poured out of the bars and climbed trees and frolicked in the giant fountain. A good time was had by all.



Our Gamecock girls play tomorrow night and it will be equally exciting.
Baseball team won series with Alabama.
It's a good time to be a Gamecock.


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I lost a young, very close friend, and drinking buddy last week. He got his finger caught in a wedding ring.


THINGS THAT IMPRESS ME

I would suck a dick for a gun like that.

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Ruins of Leptis Magna, Libya.
These sprawling ruins, with their colonnades, triumphal arches, and amphitheater, display some of the most delicate and intricately carved motifs left to us from the Romans.
How the hell did such delicacy last all these years without someone fucking them up?

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People who make things with their hands impress me, especially if the thing they are making is difficult to make.
I approve, generally, in hobbies that produce heirlooms. Just something a great-great-grandchild can take to show-and-tell and say, "My Big Diddy made this."

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I was once invited to the Red Baron Auction in Atlanta. I saw dozens of items like this.
There were dozens of complete bars dismantled and shipped to America...mostly from Ireland and England.

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The juxtaposition of old and new technology. 

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Chapelle St-Michel d’Aiguilhe, France.

Towering high over the surrounding town of Le-Puy-en-Velay, this stunning chapel dates back over 2,000 years.
Think about the struggle it must have been to get the building materials up to the top.

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I wonder how long it took early man before one of them said, "Hey, I have an idea," and did that.

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Adorned beautiful women's feet impresses me.

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That the Left Bank in Paris hasn't much changed in 200 years impresses me.

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Speaking of creating heirlooms...

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Adam Fisher is the master of making hedge mazes.
He's designed more than 700 mazes in 40 countries. If Jack Torrance ever chases me, I'm calling Fisher for help.

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People who think deep thoughts impress me.
Interesting talk:

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Homeowner turned his sprinklers on before leaving to escape a Kansas wildfire. He came home to this.

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Futuracha, a beautiful, ornamental typeface that magically adjusts as you type.
It can be downloaded.

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I would NOT actually suck a dick for that rifle.

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Gonna make a bumper sticker for my car that says "MY KID IS SMARTER THAN YOU'RE KID" just to troll the grammar nazis behind me.


PET PEEVES

Where is your god now?
People who screw around with perfectly good food pisses me off. 

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People who just make shit up to improve their argument piss me off.

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I guess it's the artist in me, or maybe something else, but I cringe every time I see something like that. A capital P, A and N, juxtaposed with a lower case L.
Tsk, tsk. 

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People who believe in ghosts piss me off.
And, in America anyway, there is a huge percentage of us who do.

Then there's the "nothing just happens...it's all part of a plan." If only. But the real universe doesn't work like that.
The last time someone asked what religion I was, I said "Non-delusional."

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Manufacturer used a bullshit pseudo-antenna for sales purposes.

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In Los Angeles, people convicted of crimes can sometimes pay extra money to stay in comfortable city jails, like the Beverly Hills City Jail, instead of crowded, dangerous county jails. The LA Times reports that "allowing some defendants to avoid the region’s notoriously dangerous county jails has long rankled some in law enforcement who believe it runs counter to the spirit of equal justice.
And during one of my run-ins with the law I was offered $57 or 57 days. OF COURSE I went with the fine, but there were many in the same courtroom with me who didn't have the money, so they ended up with jail time...on their record...forever. These people, on that day anyway, were always black.

The other day when a guy drove home, he saw a suspicious guy on his porch. Not wanting to confront the guy, he drove around the block and called the police to remove suspicious person from his porch. Cop gets there and phones him to say there is no suspicious person, only some white guy. The guy said that it was indeed the white guy he wanted removed.
That story is rather telling I would say.

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You leave one letter out of a line of code and...
The amount of time people waste playing silly games pisses me off.

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Things that have probably never been said: "I'll give you 10 seconds to take back what you said about my wind chimes."


PEOPLE NOT LIKE ME AND YOU


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Rush Sturges and Ben Marr decided they needed a more exciting way to risk their lives than mere rapids. So they dragged a tandem kayak up to the top of a drainage ditch in the woods, and then hopped in for a ride back down.

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RUSSIANS ALL

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You foreigners will hear Americans say "There were a ton of people there last night." Yeah, well over here that means like 6 1/3 people.


FUNNIES


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Not everyone prays the same way.
"The exorcism of Ameenah Raj"?
Those zany Muslims. 

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What you doing?
Just lion around. 

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I stay in shape by drinking lots of beer until bedtime, and exercising by walking to and from the bathroom forty times at night.


ART AND ARTISTS


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Artist Hank Schmidt travels to scenic locations only to paint the pattern on his own shirt.
I have toted canvases that large out into the forest when I fancied myself an expressionist. I really liked it.

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How I wish that is a living thing.

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The website to print out your own:

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In phone books, "assisted living" is next to "assassin", so be more careful than I was, hiring someone to 'take care of grandma'.


THINGS I LEARNED TODAY

There is such a thing as this half plastic bottle/pop-top can...

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[verification needed]

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1980: average parent ; 4 kids
2016: average kid ; 4 parents

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Judge me by the people I avoid.



1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I dont believe heterosexuality exists. You should suck a dick Ralph its quite fun.

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