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I'm an artist, educator, militant anti-theist , and I write. I gamble on just about anything. And I like beer...but I love my wife. This blog contains observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while.

Thursday, July 2, 2020


One Of My Very Own





I would have liked to have seen that. 







Are we not gonna talk about how Edward Scissorhands’ mom had sex with a cutlery drawer?




Petrified wood containing turquoise opal found in Queensland, Australia
 [verification needed]

Large candles have a minimum first burn time to prevent tunneling. The first burn is the most important. Candles should burn one hour for every 1 inch in diameter of the actual candle size. Therefore, a 4-inch diameter candle should burn for a minimum of 4 hours to liquefy the entire top layer of wax. If the wax is not allowed to liquefy or to melt from edge to edge of the jar or tumbler, it will create a 'memory ring,' especially if this is the first time the candle is lit. Once a candle has this 'memory ring,' it will continue to tunnel and to burn that way for the life of the candle. 




Day hike in the Temperate rainforest in Quinault, Wa. Olympic national forest.



The first selfie from 1839 brought to life by neural networks
Cornelius's 1839 photograph of himself. The back reads, "The first light picture ever taken". The Cornelius portrait is the first known photographic portrait. 


Type VIIC U-boat U-977 cut in half by a torpedo from USS Atule (SS-403) off Cape Cod on November 13th 1946

[wife looking at credit card statement] Did you buy a “talk like Lil Jon” audiobook?



A Future President
"On June 14, 1862, Brigadier General James A. Garfield was in the field in Alabama with the Union Army of Ohio. Garfield was vocally anti-slavery and was frustrated that the Union Army was not permitted to liberate enslaved men, women, and children. He wrote a letter to his wife, Lucretia, that read in part:
"No one who sees the splendor and luxury of these wealthy planters' homes can fail to see that the 'Peculiar Institution' has great charms for the rich, and yet no one can fail to see that it is the poor man's bane. We pass these fine plantations and see the slaves toiling for masters and masters' sons who are in the rebel army fighting us, and we let them stay at their toil...
I could chill your blood with the recital of horrors that have resulted in slaves from their expectation of deliverance and they're being abandoned to death at the hands of their overseers. But I have not time nor heart to write these things."
Garfield correctly believed that slavery was the root cause of the war and wanted the abolition of slavery to be a stated goal of the Union as soon as the war began. Not until President Abraham Lincoln issued the Preliminary Emancipation Proclamation on September 22, 1862, however, did that become the case." 

She must be a men's soccer coach. 





Pouring and serving five cups of şerbet at once(Not to be confused with sorbet).

Hong Kong protesters remove barricades for an ambulance.


How fast was Mike Tyson? Fast.

- Dad probably
With hilarious sound: 




If there has ever been a reasonable case for a plea of insanity, maybe it's this one.
Andrew Gilbertson is charged with robbing a Bank of America in October 2013 - which is perhaps the first bullet point in an insane person. I mean come on, there are SO many easier illegal ways to get money in 2015. While taking the stand this Wednesday, he reached into his pants to grab his own personal brand for a snack, as instructed to him by the Virgin Mary herself.
Unsurprisingly, the court was called into a recess, where a mental health expert was called in to analyze Gilbertson's behavior. 


“and it goes without saying…”
*proceeds to say it*





 Try to guess what these are before scrolling down...
There's a type of fungus called "Dead Man's Toes"
The guy's dentures fell in the toilet.
Question: Would you put them back in your mouth?



Player three has entered the game...


He refuses to go home from his walk. 



 This dog is trained to sniff out people wasting time on Folio Olio.











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