About Me

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I'm an artist, educator, militant anti-theist , and I write. I gamble on just about anything. And I like beer...but I love my wife. This blog contains observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while.

Monday, August 10, 2020

MONDAY #4247

One Of My Very Own



That's a correlation/causation fallacy.
They once proved that children who had an electric frying pan in their house did better at school. Of course, all it proved was that family with enough discretionary income to buy that frying pan also had the money for books, trips to museums, etc.

But much later they did the same thing with laptop computers. At first blush, I would dismiss it as a correlation, but it is very much causation.


The only thing that would limit its use in combat is that he can't shoot back. 


Supersonic Onyx anti-ship cruise missile takeoff.

Range up to 300km with a high-low trajectory, or 120km with a low-low flight trajectory. Speeds up to 3186kmh.
As an old missileman, I like the stabilizing rockets that first knock it over horizontal.
 Then the opposite rockets stop its rotation.
 Then those rockets are jettisoned.

You can see where the rocket pack landed...
 Right there...

The universe loves circles...

And spheres, of course.

Before airplanes were invented, it took approximately a week to feed babies because the parents had to walk the spoon into their mouths.




I feel sorry for the fish. It was just being friendly. 


There are two kinds of dogs.

This tells me one thing...
The dog is not hungry.


Not a dog.

When I die I wanna come back as a gerbil because they’re so cuddly and are notoriously vindictive, grudge-holding creatures.



Same girl. Same bike. 71 years later.
And the same house. 
And if anyone notices the kickstand is down don't say anything - we don't need that kind of negativity.


I think about food often.

Oh, I don't eat that much, I think about all the people who invented my favorite foods...and I don't even know their name.

The KING of burger... Chicken not so much.

The Dolomites, Italy

Do you think that ridge is actually that steep or is it a trick of the camera lens?

You do remember what happened in France in 1790?

My niece wrote:
"Three different times lately a snake was curled up around our door.
 We like to think it was the universe’s way of telling us to stay the heck inside." 

 I never let peer pressure get to me.
My self worth index is platinum.

I was a junior in college and so fucking poor I couldn't afford that.

It was stated that the guy did not die.

Me: This recipe calls for one red onion.
Onion: Seize the means of production!
Me: Close enough.



 The reference:



Try to read the titles from left to right top to bottom.




Think Monte Python




 You've been meatballed!


Gay Agenda Chem Trails
I put non-maskers in the same league as the chemtrails, flat earth, fake moon landing, and anti-vax morons.

PC Wallpaper


How wonderful.


But wait. I was going to comment on the strange leg then I came upon this:
What's up with that?


Those are her fake rubber butt pads.

High school talent show
And the crowd went wild.


Notice anything odd?

The window crank handle is electrified.

Me going down on my wife after she gets out of the shower. 











Anonymous said...

Puzzle time: I found more than 21.

June only has 30 days
Calendar starts with Wednesday
No year on Calendar (might not be a mistake)
Carrots on bush
Daytime out door but nighttime out window
Mountains in view out door but not out window (not necessarily a mistake)
Either door is missing or the latch for the door is missing
Rather odd to have a lounge chair in the kitchen
Chair missing wheel
Kid wearing mismatched shoes
Kid's pants legs don't match
Woman sleeves don't match
Woman cleaning carpet with floor buffer
Woman's shoes are not appropriate for cleaning
No power cord for floor buffer
Clock is jacked up
Counter doesn't run length of cabinet
Books under the sink (no plumbing)
Food under sink (odd)
Open cabinet door has handle on wrong side
Closed cabinet door has no handle
Fridge contains cleaning supplies
Two hot water spigots (they are both red)
Curtains on outside of sash

weaponoffishdestruction@gmail.com said...

practically everything is wrong with that puzzle picture.

Anonymous said...

1 Calendar has 31 days in June
2 Numbers on the clock are backward
3 Refrigerator door has key and lock
4 Refrigerator has brooms in it.
5 Books under sink
6 Items on top shelf under sink are too high for a sink basin to exist.
7 Handle of the door under sink is on the inside.
8 Night out of window and day out of door
9 Curtain on outside of window.
10. Carrots growing on tree outside.
11 Girl’s sleeves are different.
12 Boy’s shoes are different.
13 Counter does not cover the cabinets under calendar
14 Using a floor scrubber on a rug.
15 No electrical line from floor cleaner to an outlet.
16. Days of week on calendar not in correct order.
17 Front right wheel(castor)missing on chair.
18. Book has title on front page but not on spine.
19 Cabinet doors under sink do not align correctly. The open door is too narrow to close across the space, and the door next to it doesn’t have a cross member for the open door to attach its hinges to.
20 No handle on the cabinet door on the far right.
21 Green stripes on wall at window are darker than those on wall at door.
22 Rug pattern does not match on the ends.

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