FOLIO OLIO: ADVENTURER’S LOG: EARTH CYCLE 23

SPRINGFIELD, MISSOURI

Where Elvis Presley slept at least once.

Woke up this morning and my wife presented me with this and asked if I knew what it was. I didn't.

Then she presented me with this...

That pretty much let's you know you are in the country.

I found this in the parking lot as we were packing my truck. 1955 International 100....beautiful...

The window to our room is the bottom floor, second from the right.....under the scaffold. The motel was being stuccoed and I learned a lot of new spanish curse words from the Mexican crew...

We had decided to take US 65 all the way to Springfield...

Four lanes, divided by huge median, well groomed. We hated it. I tagged this post only because it was the only wooden anything for an hour's driving...

So we decided to take the back roads even though it was a little bit out of our way...and cranked up Willy Nelson's "On The Road Again" and were happy...

The county roads in Missouri are lettered instead of numbered...

Most of the turns had no signs and Garmin didn't identify any of the towns, which explains the marks on the map. We spent more time lost than we did otherwise...but we LIKE getting lost on back roads.

Came to this and thought of doing something different...

Saw this and couldn't resist...

Running low on utensils, so didn't want to tag another sign.

Speaking of urine, I stopped here to pee also. It was a very beautiful spot, so it deserved a tag...

This is the knife's view for as long as it endures...

My wife and I were traveling somewhere with my daughter, when she looked out the window at a scene similar to this and snarled, "I hate black cows!" with enough venom to poison a whole division of Attila's Huns...

My wife and I exchanged looks, then I said, "Of all the things there are to hate - genocide, racism, childhood cancer, politicians - why would you settle on black cows?
Her reply: "I just do." Which, I guess, is reason enough.

Tonight we are staying in the "Best Western Route 66 Rail Haven". It has been opened since 1937 and has documentation that Elvis Presley did, in fact, stay here, but they don't know which room. So I could be staying in the same room as The King...which, as everybody knows, makes my dick get hard.
Here's a few random pics of the place...

This is our kind of place...

But who paints stone walls?

A couple of pictures in our room...

I want a toilet like this...

It has two buttons...one for number one and another for shit...

They have various 1950's cars sitting around...

When we came back from dinner, these identical bikes were parked near the front building....identical in every way. What's up with that?

Remember the roads being lettered instead of numbered? You can't imagine the confusion when, as a half deaf man, I hear Garmin's computer voice say, "Turn on highway H in 8 miles." The H and the 8 sound identical.

We've been Ruralized. We always waved back to waving passing motorists, but now we wave first and they never fail to return it. That's a good thing.

This is a printout of one man's arrest record...

The next time you take out a credit card, look at the hologram. I just met a guy who works for a company who makes all of them.

I know that Campbell's soup has four suppliers for their noodles in case one burns down or is swallowed by an earthquake, then the other three could pick up the slack, thus insuring supply. So I asked him about the credit card companies if his factory exploded.

He said they were required to have three months supply stored off-site. Plus in another facility they have the identical equipment just sitting there idle unless it is needed in an emergency.

I found that interesting, but if all the workers are killed in the explosion, I don't know what they would do....unless they have shifts, then they can't all be killed, can they.

This evening I got caught peeing in the motel swimming pool. The life guard yelled at me so loud I almost fell in.

Casket Barbi....

On the first night of our honeymoon, my wife suggested that whoever woke up first in the morning would wake the other one with oral sex, and I agreed. The next morning I woke up first, so I slowly pulled back the covers and stuck my dick in her mouth.

They have determined that the train wreck in Spain was human error...as was the last two plane crashes...

I walked in on my daughter masturbating one day. Luckily she was still too young to understand what I was doing.

The earthquake in China. Look at that face...

Note large crack...

Prince William revealed today that he changed his first diaper. Unfortunately, it was Queen Elizabeth's.

Our old friend irony...

Gelatin desserts are not hemorrhoid ointments.

Once the game is over, the king and the pawn go back into the same box.

(I like that very much)

These pricks put the "You" in Fuck You.

Is it possible to riot alone?

A mosquito landed on my wife's ass. Easiest decision of my life.

Notice the rubber gloves...

Well, this chick could carry the whole fucking shipment...

My wife told me that after dinner we were going to take a long walk through this small hamlet we find ourselves. But it started raining and I felt like the kid who didn't do his homework and the teacher is absent.

Things to get depressed about...