SATURDAY #1807

SOMEWHAT TOPICAL

It was said that this might be the most powerful hurricane ever.

JOKES
I tried to tell this joke to a male bartender today, but a female bartender walked over at the same time:
"I went to Lowe's today for an artificial Christmas tree and the guy said, 'Are you going to put it up yourself?' I said, 'NO! That's gross! I'm going to put it in the living room.'"
The male bartender laughed. The young female bartender asked, "How much are those artificial trees, anyway?"
.......................I weep for the future.

 We spend so much money, but I doubt a Chinese sub could make it to east coast without a US attack sub on its ass.

Once I gave my daughter milk with a little whiskey to sleep better but she just stayed up late telling me how great friends we were & how much she woved me.

Never really thought about Mr. and Mrs. Noah and their family having to look out over millions of floating fellow humans...

 Shit like that would fuck up normal folks' minds.

“Those who prefer their principles over their happiness, they refuse to be happy outside the conditions they seem to have attached to their happiness.” — Albert Camus

These things are all over the world. I think of them often...

Love to see this at shrine in Mecca...

 Not to blow up the rock, but pyrotechnics just to add a little pizzazz.

A 14 year old kid with a toy like this shot by cop who thought it was real....

OOMVO...

HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHHAHAAA!!!

If you stop, you owe the man a buck...period.

So, there....

A generous man is never alone...

This is a new sport. The sled and road are decked out in powerful microphones to record the decibel level of bone breakage...

LET'S DO PARENTING

Is this cruel parenting?

I think not.

Inside, I laugh at new parents who try to explain how they will just teach their child not to touch valuable stuff around the house...

Wait for it....twice...

OOMVO...

Dudeism...

Come join the slowest-growing religion in the world – Dudeism. An ancient philosophy that preaches non-preachiness, practices as little as possible, and above all, uh…lost my train of thought there. Anyway, if you’d like to find peace on earth and goodwill, man, we’ll help you get started. Right after a little nap.

Me and daughter have different views on atomic energy...

Fireplaces, coal mines, etc, all cause death and/or illness. I just wish they would move the nukes out away from people and find a foolproof design.

Java light house built to the same height as the 1868 tsunami...

 The tsunami, of course, swamped the whole island...

But back then there were only two people living there...a guy named Floyd and his wife, Hereboy; both disgustingly obese, thus amazingly buoyant, which saved their lives....until the diabetes kicked in.

Two men dress as portals….

Poor people do what poor people have always done...

And during the Vietnam War just about every fighter jet had these to increase flying time, then dropped them into the jungle when unneeded.

Bad neighborhood?

Poor people do what poor people have always done...American style...

At least he's trying to find the truth with experimentation...

 Then we started lining up just like they British did.
Never understood that.

Some Facebook comments are better than others...

 Assuming this could recharge is cell phone in the middle of the fucking desert.

Silly, but unexpected...

The real reason women like mirrors on the ceiling...

Oh, my...

I had surgery once wherein four different people asked me which side would be affected and each marked it with a different color pen...