TUESDAY #2221

The cause of the fall, by $40 a barrel, in petroleum prices since last summer is almost completely on the demand side. Asian economies, especially China, are dramatically slowing, and won’t be requiring as much petroleum to fuel trucks, trains and cars to deliver people and goods around the country. Most petroleum is used to fuel transport. US journalists seem to feel it obligatory to mention US shale oil production as a contributor to the price fall, since prices are a matter of supply and demand, and US supply has increased by a couple million barrels a day. But frankly that is a minor increase in world terms– global production is roughly 90 million barrels a day. Between Iran, Iraq (Kirkuk), Libya and Syria, enough oil has gone out of production to more than offset the additional American oil. It isn’t that there is more oil being pumped, it is that the world doesn’t want it as much because of cooling economies.

LET'S START OFF WITH A FEW BOOK I DIDN'T KNOW EXISTED

That one had an interesting disclaimer...

 I saw a demonstration by Vincent Price of all people of how to cook fish in a dishwasher.

You don't have to listen to all of this to catch the drift...

Moving on...

The hardest part about being a vegan is having to wake up a 5am to milk all the almonds.

Anthony Hopkins Tried On Many Masks Before He Found The Lecter Look...

You’ll turn out ordinary if you’re not careful.

How to know for a fact that you have too much money...

(Except Obama didn't, couldn't, do all those things)

How wonderful...

Don’t believe people when they ask you to be honest with then.

Well, that ought to do it...

Guy's son gets head stuck in gate...

 He lifts it up to the top, but can't get it through...

 He lowers it to the bottom and still can't get it out...

 After several attempts, the guy turns his back and his son...

 ...just steps through the bars.

 Which is probably how he got in that fix to begin with.

One Of My Very Own...

My daughters are only 15 months apart, so with only a few months left before the second was due, my wife said that we should potty train the first so she wouldn't have two kids in diapers at the same time. So we bought a little kiddy potty and put it in the bathroom. It wasn't long before my child asked what it was, so I said, "It's for you to use when you want to go to the bathroom like a big kid." Hours later she pulled own her own diaper and peed int the potty. My ex-wife and I started cheering and dancing, more or less congratulating ourselves. Then we looked down at my terrified daughter. I deduced that from her perspective her peeing in that potty had made her parents go completely insane and....she never sat on it again for one year. You new parents should be very careful when it comes to such things.

Edge-on view of a galaxy far, far away...

It’s hard to talk shit without any teeth.

When I ask my wife for sex, she pulls on my dick one time for yes and 300 times for no.

Photography...

Try this: Walk up behind someone you don’t know and say, “You smell like your house.”

Having cats is like having a pack of tiny, clumsy, asshole, ninjas running around your house destroying everything and constantly trying to trip and kill you.

If there are two girls in the profile picture, the account belongs to the ugly one.

 I spent a few months in Labrador; Goose Bay to be exact...

The Air Force had sent me there erroneously. Upon arrival we were all herded into a giant airplane hangar and one by one a sponsor would find a new arrival and lead them off to where they were supposed to go. It was -56 below zero...or so I was told. Anyway, after a while I was the only one standing in the hangar. Finally I walked up to an office and suggested I had been forgotten. He asked what unit I was assigned and I told him. He then said, "That's impossible. The 59th moved out of here three months ago." I asked, "Are there any nuclear weapons on the base?" And he said, "Nope." That's when I began to dance...knowing I would soon be shipped out to a base that did have nuclear weapons. That soon turned out to be 3 months...the most miserable time of my life.

I think, as a people, we can all agree that our 2015 resolution should be to keep a better eye on our airplanes.

Drinking and walking...

I have been known to drive a vehicle after a few beers. I only have six blocks to go and I NEVER get in a hurry, obey the traffic laws and won't allow myself to get distracted. What worries me is that some idiot (see above) will cause an accident and I will get busted for something that was not my fault.

 Looks like somebody blew a seal...