THURSDAY #5223

 One Of My Very Own

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EMAIL: 

ralh.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com

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NOTE: I really like this post.

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FUN WITH LANGUAGE

^^A1^^

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My wife and I have both lived within walking distance of our jobs all of our lives.

^^A4^^

Childhood leukemia? Fuck you.

^^A5^^

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*MNBT

^^A7^^

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What do you call a doctor who graduates at the bottom of his class? Doctor.

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*I LOVE absurdity like that!

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It was a bright cold day in April and the clocks were striking thirteen.

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FOR AMUSEMENT ONLY

Be like that guy. The world needs as much sunshine as it can get.

^^B1^^

Titanic Kerioake

^^B2^^

Geography For The Rest Of Us

^^B3^^

Let's play a game.

Can the car pull the tablecloth out without toppling the glasses?

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No.

^^B5^^

A Moment of Clarity

^^B6^^

Dog In Car

^^B7^^

Finding Your Girlfriend

^^B8^^

For Danny

^^B9^^

Language Barrier

^^B10^^

Lie Detector

God, I hate it when that happens to me.

^^B11^^

Maria

^^B12^^

Monkeying Around

^^B13^^

Run For Your Life

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Traffic Mishap

Question: Do you think that was staged?

^^B15^^

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Do you think you can hurt my feelings? I used to hold a flashlight for my dad while he worked on the car.

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Lurk. Laugh. Loathe.

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PEOPLE NOT LIKE THE REST OF US

Public Proposal

^^C1^^

Miss RoboCop

^^C2^^

I am so fortunate that my #1 Advisor is a real scientist. She has forgotten more about climate change than you will ever know. And I trust her more than anyone on Earth. And she says we are fucked.

^^C3^^

Futility Illustrated

^^C4^^

Healing Monk

*Verification Requested

^^C5^^

Let's play another game.

An obvious insurance fraud but what absurdity happens next?

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Hell, I would give her a settlement on her acting ability alone.

Did you notice the ambulance just going 'fuck this shit'.

^^C6^^

Historical Events

I've been giving that a lot of thought. The problem with the things I would like to witness is that they all occur gradually. Like early man controlling fire, or the invention of the wheel. But if I had to pick one moment in time to revisit I would want to see the look on the face of the first person to taste a chocolate chip cookie.

^^C7^^

The Slide Mishap

Why is he screaming like a snake bit a little girl if he was ready to slide down anyway?

^^C8^^

Coast Guard Uber

Did you notice how close to the water his tail was?

^^C9^^

Grandma Gone Wild

That was either factual or they are damn good actors.

^^C10^^

Dance Steps

Can you imagine white men trying to do that?

^^C11^^

Wild Cat Release

That she has a tool made specifically for that tells me it happens often.

^^C12^^

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The most dangerous kind of canoes is volcanoes.

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"You can't find a wife on Tinder."

"Buddy, I found your wife on Tinder."

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ON THE NAUGHTY BITS

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"My eyes are up here."

"Well, my dick is down here, and bet if half of it was hanging out you would stare at it too."

^^D6^^

Prostitution is interesting in that it is illegal to charge for something that is legal to give away.

^^D7^^

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A problem as old as time...

^^D9^^

Fireworks my ass

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I can never see a garter belt that I don't think about the time my wife and I were sitting in the dark balcony at an opera and my wife slid my hand...oh, never mind.

^^D17^^

The Screw

There's another honeymoon story in there somewhere.

Overenthusiasm will do that.

^^D18^^

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