One Of My Very Own
*I put the chickens on their plates myself just to make Danny proud of me.
FUN WITH LANGUAGE
And...
????
I once told the woman in the drive-thru that I wanted a double hamburger with as much mustard and onions as she could legally put on a burger. She heard the word "legally" and freaked. I did end up with a great burger, however.
Humor is an excellent way to get your message across.
I used to hang out in a German bar/dance club called the Wilhelmshöhe. We all called it The Shoe. It was open 24 hours a day and some wild shit went on there. One morning my friend and I were eating breakfast with several German friends including two of the Shoe's bouncers - one of which was the ex-middle weight boxing champion when one of the men was called to the phone. When he came back to the table all he said was, "Trouble at the Shoe" and everyone got up and left. My friend and I followed the Germans to the Shoe where we found the bar filled with drunk French rugby players. We all spread out, a Frenchman grabbed a waitress' ass, she screamed, and then all hell broke loose. Within minutes the Frenchmen were herded toward the front door. I ended up standing there with a chair leg in my hand. Then the cops arrived.
That one event permanently endeared me to all those fellow combatants. After that, I could do no wrong. I was like a made man in the Mafia.
What an interesting segue...
Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
Excellent Life Hack: When you get our age have your wife sunbath naked in the back yard and you get a free privacy fence paid for by your neighbors.
PEOPLE
That is one of the most stupid things I have ever heard. I will assure you that this young warrior could kick his ass.
But remember, the same people said black people would ruin the military, then it was women, then it was gay people and now we have the most lethal military the world has ever known.
He is not a very observant man...
Indeed.
"Don't touch the trigger. Don't touch the trigger. Okay, I'll just rest my finger right here..."
What do you think is going on there?
Yes, I appraise just about every woman's butt I see.
The PE teacher and I were standing outside our school when a young mother walked by. I am white, he was black. I said that the woman had a perfect butt but he scoffed that it was much too small and that "I would hurt a woman with a butt that small". I did not ask for clarification.
But I do find it interesting that the notion of the ideal butt has grown in recent years.
What really confuses me is how women fake the crease between their butt and thigh with their fingers.
That reminds me of young men using their fingers to push up their biceps from the inside.
But if you want to show off a body part, do I have an idea for you...
Customer service can not be overstated to get return business.
I bought a cart for $1000 on Overstock.com. It wouldn't charge and the key wouldn't ever turn in the starter. I called them and a wonderful young lady gave me a full refund and told me to dispose of it as I wished. I gave it to a young friend who replaced the key starter with a toggle switch, charged it up, sold it for $600 then gave me half.
He met a Victoria’s Secret model at the airport. Perfect day to be wearing that shirt.
*OSIT
Let me ask you a question: If you won $1 million, would you still walk into a convenience store and buy lottery tickets? I would like to think I would be much too busy to deal with that.
Scooter Ace
But I'm sure the ER staff will find his pants festive.
We know that humans do not always act responsibly.
Knowing that people are often irresponsible, why would anyone in their right mind put that lever within reason of a passenger?
The answer may not be at the bottom of a margarita glass but you should at least check.
When I say, "Call me if you need anything", I'm referring to hugs, words of encouragement, etc, - you know, the free shit.
PLACES
When my wife and I toured Europe we only had the clothes we wore and one changing. When needed we just stopped at a laundromat. What I found interesting was that many fellow travelers did the same thing and often you would find young people sitting in the laundromats in only their underwear.
^^C1^^
I only had to live in one house with two flights of stairs leading to the front door and a kitchen on the rear of the house away from the door to convince me that I would never live in a house thus configured. My house now has the kitchen three (3) feet from the driveway with only one small step up.
I seem to remember that the face had to be recessed because they discovered cracks.
There are true believers but most people just go along to get along. You are probably one of those people.
Sometimes you not only have to put your camera in the right place but you have to do it at the right time of day.
I wonder why they did it that way.
SOME AIRPORTS ARE MORE INTERESTING THAN OTHERS
At this airport, luggage comes out of the car trunk
At this airport, they have a machine that will print off free short stories for you to read while you wait!
“Clean” my shower? Then what? Give my car a ride into town? Grow up.
Can we get some a.i. to pick plastic out of the ocean or do ALL the robots need to be artists and screenwriters?
THINGS
Does that remind you of anything I make? Hint: they have hinges.
I wonder how long that took them.
People with huge dogs have a huge responsibility and one of those is to teach them not to jump up on people.
15 Minute DIY Corsi–Rosenthal Box
My grandson makes one of those for each room of his house. He's seven.
BTW you don't need a stand. Just sit it on the floor.
It kind of reminds me of this...
Here are some over-detailed instructions:
Can you spell "whiplash", boys and girls?
Tell me again how it's not a cult.
How would you spell this?
5 comments:
Your nasty comments on the Titanic rescue firmly establish you as an adherent of the politics of envy.
^^B11^ Buying scratch tickets is like an addiction. (I know.) People who buy them on the regular just do it automatically. Also, a million dollars (after taxes) doesn't go as far as you might think, if you're spending it on cigs and beer and dope. Plus, all your "friends" want to help you spend it.
^^C6^^ maybe it's a bus stop?
^^D2^^ I think they ruined it with the labels.
Dear Billr,
But look how the bench is mounted. It makes no sense.
RH
Dear Mike,
You caught me. And I thought I was hiding it so well.
Why don't you start your own blog so I can learn how a non-envious person does it? I would comment on that sumbitch every day.
Have a blessed day.
RH
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