FUN WITH LANGUAGE

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NIGHTMARE FUEL

...your tank is full.

( Scratching the eight ball three times in the gene pool game )

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You're telepathic? he asked.

Yes, she answers.

Wh-

You were about to ask me what you are thinking.

Th-

And now you were about to tell me that you were not planning to ask me that.

You-

No, I'm not crazy...........Wisconsin...........And now you are staring at my boobs.

Ha! I was staring at them all along!

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Misspellings can make me smile....but not always...so just one example...

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Did you know Alaska buys more sex toys per capita than any other state? Or that Mississippi buys more anal sex toys per capita? I did. But I did not know the world's largest dildo

available retail

is the 'Great American Challenge', at 14.5" long and 8.75" around.

( My God, you could drive a truck through that vagina! And not an F-150 either, I'm talking something with at least six wheels. Plus mud-flaps. Towing a mobile home. )

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HAHAHAHAHAHAAH!!!!

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TRUE: Rapper "C-Murder" has been convicted of murder after shooting a fan.

( Coincidence? I think not.)

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I beg to differ... *****

I think purposely scarring yourself and poking large holes in your flesh are great ideas.........makes it easier to spot the truly freaky among us.

***** ...but we're still not sorry.

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Congratulations to Spain for winning the World Cup, or as it was announced in North Korea, Congratulations to North Korea for winning the World Cup.

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Some people just try to make your day a little bit less boring...I offer two...

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And not a single fuck was given all day.

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Not only is it an interesting concept, but the headline is brilliant... *****

If I choose not to decide, have I made a decision?

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Those zany foreigners without an English dictionary... *****

What is the difference between a successful illusion and the truth?

Nothing.

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Why are dogs better than women? Dogs don't mind if you sell their children for extra beer money.

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OR

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I was looking up fetish porn on the internet and there was a tab for Downs Syndrome porn. I was like DAMN, that's just fucking retarded.

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We've all wanted one of these signs from time to time, haven't we... *****

If all the people in China stood on a chair and jumped off at exactly the same time, would it knock the earth off its axis?

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Today I found a ring tone for my phone called Ninja. I changed it, of course, but a few minutes later I heard it ring, but couldn't find it. Well played Ninja ring tone...well played.

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The not funny part... Be very afraid, my friend, be very afraid. This could only happen if someone divided by zero in a black hole. But on the bright side, only about half of us are paying taxes.

Jeeeeeez.

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These next two made me think of just how many times this had to happen to warrant the posting of the sign...

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This young man kept a diary of his airplane trip. I thought these three rather clever...

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FACT: One nuclear submarine can hold more destructive power than all of the bombs ever dropped.

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WOW!....Get it? Just plain wow in the MaysMode.

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And meanwhile at the school for children in the witness protection program... *****

I am of the opinion that Jesus wasn't technically "killed". Not because he became alive again (and killed denotes permanence ), but rather that he committed suicide. *****

How in the world can you explain this? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

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You might want to enlarge this...some of them surprised me. *****

Life is short. Break the rules. Forgive quickly. Kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably. And never regret anything that made you smile.

Life may not to be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we should dance .

( I'm still working on the "Forgive quickly" part )

***** HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAAHAH!!!!

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One of my very own...that is kind of about language.

Mujaddara or moujadara^[1] (Arabic: مجدرة‎; Hebrew: מג'דרה; Cypriot Greek:Μουκ̌έντρα; Turkish: müceddere), also known as mejadra, mudardara, or megadarra, consists of cooked lentils together with groats, wheat or rice, garnished with roasted onions that have been sauteed in vegetable oil. Yummy!

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A late arrival...

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