About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Monday, June 11, 2012

MONDAY'S ALTILOQUENT



For the second consecutive weekend, I lost money in a poker game. That is all.

My generation didn't give a shit about the war, we only cared that we may have been asked to fight it...


I try to learn something from my TV every day.
While putting this blog together, I have the TV on the History, Science, Military, Discovery or The Learning Channel. Lately, however, on these channels is nothing but rednecks, repairers, ghost hunters, UFO nuts and prisoners.
It's a sad, sad day in America when a toothless man hunting alligators trumps Steven Hawking.


I will state again, I think that 75% of the opposition to Obama is pure racism.....


Something you don't see every day....


Before giving me anesthesia, my dentist always takes a hit himself.





At your desire.....



Have you ever had to go outside to get something out of the fridge?





This is about the coolest invention I've seen in a while.
The first one I saw had an air inlet that went almost to the floor.
You do understand that once the air is heated over the black collector plate, it must rise and be replaced by the cooler air lower in the room.
Instant heater with no moving parts to break.

Battle of the bands just got real....

Got this yesterday in my email.....TRUE.....


Another page from a Chinese English text book....



Can you name the movies?


Mt. McKinley casting it's shadow on the clouds....


Remember the kid growing up who would say "One!" every time you told him to wait a sec?
I hope he's dead now.





Three of the greatest things about summer....


Avoid all women who write your name on their leg....
with a knife.




Not sure if good news or bad news....


I know I'm old fashion, but if you go out with me, I will ask you to put your device away so we can talk....


That awkward moment when you make eye contact with the person next to you at the red light.



ONE OF MY VERY OWN...


What do you mean by "Five cups of coffee and a Mound's bar isn't a good breakfast?!"





Yo mama is soooo fat........


Cut, paste, cut, paste....

ANOTHER OF MY VERY OWN...
My daughter called today to ask me what those little dotted lines were on my pictures (above). Well, they showed up on my power point and I'm too stupid to know how to get rid of them.



The man who said it can't be done....
should not interrupt the woman doing it.





I feel sorry for kids nowadays, when they see a computer game on TV they want but cannot have because their parents have to be 18 years old to order it.



Korean holiday ad.....
Clever, that.

See thousands of these a week....this one made the cut...


Hey, art major, good luck in your job search. Too bad the only forklift experience you have is at the dinner table.



If you don't know why this is funny, it's okay...it really is...

Do you recognize this woman?
 Hint: She has eight children...all born at once.



Once while I was working in the nuclear weapons compound, I was asked to escort the German guy who had come to fill up the tanks for the furnace. As I stood there I heard someone screaming, looked up and an Air Police was running in my direction with his loaded weapon. When I glanced over, the German was smoking a cigarette directly over the hole in the ground whence thousands of gallons of fuel was stored. I got in trouble for not escorting properly.


No fucking comment....


Another reason I don't ride public transportation....


Don't you just hate it when you're in prison and you don't drop the soap and you still get raped?




And not a nigger in the photograph.....


Condos right on the golf course.
Nursing homes right in the graveyard.
(I wish I knew who wrote that....the first time)





What's going to happen to all the NASA scientists and engineers?


I've got a thing for horses. Second only to dogs....
They actually like us.


Watching porn I assume....


Would someone explain to me what this means...


Or too Le Drunk to know the difference.....


I've arranged a direct deposit of my check straight to Green's Package Store.




World map of dominating websites....

Oh, look what the interweb did....


They gave it a name?!?!?!


Some days it's best just to leave the map in the glove box.






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