About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Thursday, June 7, 2012

PHATIC THURSDAY





Very unusual image, this......



As I understand it, we are getting closer to communicating with these guys....



D-Day......personal sacrifice for the greater good...
Those men live (if they are lucky) today....


This is about the only way I'm getting back on another airplane....


More people would have prosthetic devices if they didn't charge an arm and a leg.




Best line in the series....


And now.....zombies! This is reminding me more and more of Lost....the worse part.....









When I buy new electronics, I put the box in front of my neighbor's house so I don't get robbed.


Do you know what these five people have in common?



If things get better with age, then I'm approaching magnificent.




Two gays ruining the sanctity of marriage...
I'm sorry. I thought this was America.


How....................embarrassing...............


My daughter came home from school one day and told me she got into trouble for saying "crap". I said, "Crap?! That's not even a fucking cuss word!"




And right smack in the middle of neverwhere....


I used to be a people person until people ruined it.




?????????????


TRUE: Man's cat gets run over by a truck. He has it stuffed in this position. He adds motors and propellers.


What if I'm the only person who can't read minds?





Got another spam in my comments to this blog. This was written followed by a website address for wedding gowns.
"No matter if some one searches for his required thing, thus he/she needs to be available that in detail, therefore that thing is maintained over here."
????????




I couldn't agree more....



Why the fuck didn't we Americans think of this when a storm knocks out electricity and nobody can pump gas out of the ground?


The perfect gift for dog lovers....
Truth be told, if it wasn't for dogs, god would have blown us up long ago.


Why you need editors.....




Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.




How I feel fucking a fat girl....

I was much more impressed with these before I found out that tourists get them done at trinket stalls for pennies...
Met a man last weekend who went to Egypt. He had a T-shirt with his name in hieroglyphics. I asked him how he knew that was his name and he said the T-shirt salesman told him it was.
Fool.



One of the most.....memorable scenes in all of moviedom...


I think seals are really mermaid dogs....


A Vegas hooker once told me that I was the "politest" client she'd ever had, and my mom never got to hear about it.




Okay....


I only talk to my computer when my refrigerator is mad at me.



I taught two twins. One was a hell raiser, but the other, according to his mother, acted like he wanted to crawl back in his mom's womb.
Well, in the first grade they swapped personalities. The doctor told the mother that it was not all that unusual.



If we ever travel thousands of light years to a planet inhabited by intelligent life, I think we should just make patterns in their crops and leave.




??????


My aunt has sever arthritis and for years she took gold shots. It was the only thing that reduced her pain.


"In yonder", "over yonder", and "out yonder"; it's important to know the difference.



HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!


Not again for over 100 years......


And right when I think I can't be more impressed, I come upon this....


"Ya'll" is singular and "all ya'll" is plural.




TWO OF MY VERY OWN.....


And lastly....
Public employees' unions bug me. First, do you really want your teachers, trash collectors, police and firefighters on strike? Let's think about that for a minute.
If I own a company and my employees are unionized, I have a choice between giving away more of my money or A) closing the doors, or B) moving my business overseas.
It costs a fortune to pack up and move to, say, China, but if the unions want so much that it becomes cheaper to move it abroad, then, as a reasonable person, I have to make the move....option A would still result in every worker losing their job, but with option B I can still make money.
Further, with public employees, the rules change. First, the mayor or governor is not going to go out of business if asked to fork over more money. He will just raise taxes. He has, more or less, unending funds; something the business man does not. Plus, if a tire company goes on strike we citizens can just buy tires from some other company. But if our house catches on fire, we have no options whatsoever....save a bucket brigade and/or garden hose.
Public employees (like teachers) don't get rich, but I had a premium health insurance and retirement plan to compensate.




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