About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Saturday, June 23, 2012

A RARE SATURDAY POST



I've had several people tell me that there was a void in their day on Saturday because there was no Folio Olio.
I think I know what they mean. 
I can't guarantee anything, but I will do what I can to solve the problem....might be less dialogue, but.........


As per my post concerning my affinity to weapons, I've been asked what I'm afraid of and I always say..."Nothing."
(think about that a moment)

There are some rather odd images in today's post. You might want to slow down a bit and go with the flow.



When I was growing up, a little girl and I played doctor. Too bad she wanted to be a proctologist.




You think the heights of the hat are indicative of anything?


DO. WANT.


All I ask is for a chance to prove that winning the lottery won't make me a bad person.





If you don't recognize this guy, it's okay....it really is...


I like this....
When was the last time you had a truly original thought?

Getting dressed or undressed, don't matter.....this gal ain't wearin' no panties.......not that there's anything wrong with that....


Giving birth....Asian style....I read The Good Earth...I know....

A piece of hail with a frog in it.....
 I know how this happens...the same way it rains fish. A tornado passes over a pond, sucks up some water and whatever is in the water, then it falls to earth somewhere else.


You used to be able to order an entire house from Sears&Roebuck......every nail, every brick, every screw...


I just hope room G 2.243 is on the ground floor...


Ouch!

I read this one differently.....
 I read it as the first day a goose lands in prison and the goose on the right is asking the question: "Guess which one is the wife?".

I got my Father's Day wish....


If you are going to be able to look back on something and laugh about it, you might as well laugh about it now.





No matter how low the volume is, porn is always too loud.




Guess what?


There is so very much wrong with that picture, I don't even know where to start.

 Gravity will soon become her worst enemy....

In America in 5......4......3.....



This guy "paints" objects to make them seem transparent...


This has got to be the greatest idea I have ever heard of....


Welcome to the Landmineistan........
population 8,836,763 1/2....


Need your own space on the subway?
But what the fuck's with the bag of money?

Feel compelled to repeat a true story. I was once asked to be the emcee at my school's 5th grade graduation. I handed out dozens of awards until I came to the perfect attendance award. I called the child's named three times before someone in the audience shouted that she was absent that day. Well, I got so tickled that I couldn't continue. Every time I thought I was under control, I would look up and see one of my fellow teacher's shoulders shaking in silent laughter and it was hopeless.

Do. Want.
But, how do you get in?

Yes, that's her....

I will admit...I've watched this a hundred times....
 That is one sleepy dog.



You think that is the kid's dad? Nah, me neither.


This is what the last minutes on US soil looks like to a whole bunch of our boys...



I'm actually not funny. I'm just really mean and people think I'm joking.



 Do you really need anymore facts?

Fuck the UN.

Maybe this is the reason they are the most religious people in America....


Voyager I and II are still working well after nearly 35 years. They are still sending back data from 10 billion miles away, at the very edge of the solar system.




You might want to look at this carefully...
I find that fucking hilarious.
(pun intended)

Speaking of....


I had a girlfriend when I went off to serve my country in the military. We broke up while I was deployed. When I returned she was driving a GTO and it was a blow to my ego that took some getting over....

Just taking a break on the ISS.....


Seriously, can't we just experience something...anything nowadays? Can't my memories of an event suffice without documentation? Must you interfere with my experience with a hundred flashes? Stop it, ya'll.  99.99% of you will never need documentation of every event in your life.


One of my very own...


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH!!!!



If you didn't see this...it's okay....it really is.....


Power went out yesterday and I lost internet. I looked around and there was a person in my house, then I remembered I was married.





Another of my very own....


I'm sort of like a stay at home mom without the children.




(I warned you that there were some very strange images)


 I can't help it. Dicks are everywhere.

Coming to the South? Might want to read this....

And then there's this...
"Taking a message to Garcia" used to be a common expression meaning to undertake a difficult task.
I speak daily to a colonel in the army, wounded twice, who has officers assigned to him read the story of Rowan, the man who took the message to Garcia.
During the Spanish/American war, the president had to get a message to the rebel commander, Garcia. It was suggested that a man by the name of Rowan could get him that message. Here is what was said about this extraordinary man:



"Rowan was sent for and given a letter to be delivered to Garcia. How “the fellow by the name of Rowan” took the letter, sealed it up in an oil-skin pouch, strapped it over his heart, in four days landed by night off the coast of Cuba from an open boat, disappeared into the jungle, & in three weeks came out on the other side of the Island, having traversed a hostile country on foot, and delivered his letter to Garcia, are things I have no special desire now to tell in detail."


My colonel friend has his subordinates read the book because Rowan never asked where Garcia was; what was in the message; how he was supposed to find him; or any other inquiry. He simply took the message and, indeed, delivered it to Garcia.


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