TUESDAY #1357

Most folks don't know the great deals they get at Credit Unions. These are locals who will learn your name.

First, I've never understood why some people want to take the risk of jail just to fuck with my computer. I'm not talking about embedding ads and such...I can understand that, I'm talking about what I call cyber vandals.
Anyway, the same thing goes for such as this...

I have no idea whether the caption is true or not, but those are not 1895 cars. Would someone try to explain to me what this person's motivation was?
And in the same vane, I have no idea whether Mr. Crystal said this.

It was just a cool thing to say, no matter who said it.

A lot of people say I look like him...

I hate being an adult. When did that happen?
How do we make it stop?

Research shows that clowns are not, by nature, cannibals, but they think about it more than is socially acceptable.

I saw a great wedding invitation. For the RSVP it offered two options: "Yes, we will be there," and "No, we will toast from afar."
Then below that it had several lines and, "List any songs that will get you out on the dance floor."

"I've come to ask for your daughter's hand in marriage," said young Mr. Potato Head and nobody thought it was funny.


1000 words...

Did you ever notice that when you pick up food that is so hot you have to toss it from hand to hand, the first thing you can think to do is pop it in your mouth.

In theory, they could get pregnant and have the child in the time they are in space.

WORDS OF WISDOM: The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is only one cure for curiosity.....religion.


There's a contest to name P5, a moon of Pluto...

By the way, Charon was the boatman who ferries souls across the River Styx.

Did you ever notice that when you have Monday off, you hate Tuesday.

The boy is quickly getting too big for the stores. The rule is that once he gets mobile, he has to go to day care.

He will be sorely missed.

I once took Dayquil and Nyquil at the same time just to see what would happen.

This woman was arrested for fucking her pit bull in her back yard...

The Libertarian in me says, "Why is it anybody's business if a woman wants to fuck her goddamned dog?!?!"

TRUE: Finally, after all these months, there was a car coming up my road when I tried to back my new cart out of my drive. I find that amazing.

I was turned on to House of Cards recently, a Netflix produced drama. I strongly recommend it. I've watched 12 episode in two days.
Anyway, being modern times, everyone is always getting texts and this is the way they treat them. I like it....

If I'm alone, I always try to fart in the elevator right before I get off. I once had the Department of Motor Vehicles checking for dead animals.

 BAR...Browning Automatic Rifle.

Daryl of Walking Dead...

Oh, and here's his super-model girlfriend...

And who knew?

Once when my young daughter got in the car she asked, "What does shit mean?"
That's an interesting moment, because she heard it and I had to explain it, but I also had to be honest.
So I said, "Well, honey, shit is a word that some people use to describe your gymnastic performance today. Sorry I shouted that, but you're almost six...pull it together!"

Remember what I've always said about lazy writing? Well, if Harry had an invisibility cloak, the first thing he and Ron would think to do would be go into the girl's shower.


Women Who Look Like Sluts, but probably aren't...

I don't have Facebook or a Twitter account, so I just run around screaming out what I'm doing at random times. So far I have three followers, but I think two are cops.

Two very weak ones of my very own...

1950 White House renovation...

It's not a drug problem until you run out of money.

1000 words....

Textures...yeah, they are important.

And....AND the little motherfucker bites the orca on the nose!!!!

I find shit like this fascinating...

I love everything there is love about this car....except the unibody, but let's not dwell on it...

What you may not know is that after about 1950, each model year had a slightly larger tail light, until of the last ones were as large as a dinner plate. This bibelot looks to be a '55 or so.

Now let's revisit this post from yesterday. 

Makes you think, don't it?
That may tell us that Buddhism has legs, so to speak.

As a father of two daughters, I take this shit very, very seriously...

If this is true, I would like to relate an observation.

I watched a documentary about serial killers and it was stated that almost without fail, they all had suffered from some kind of brain damage as a child. Maybe babies born in the icy month of November were more likely to be slammed onto the sidewalk when their mom's fall.

Oh, my....

You call it cute....they call it lunch...

AND THEN THERE'S THIS....

I assume you all know that we Americans are being watched and listened to at a pace that would make our founding fathers puke. Almost to a man, their biggest fear was a tyrannical government running rough shod over the people.

Now, this true story.

My wife and I were sitting at our favorite bar for lunch. She had some texts to send, or some such shit, and then she laid her phone on the bar. Then we had a short (20 second) conversation. When it was over, she picked her phone up and gasped.

There on the screen was every fucking word we had said....hers and mine.

She didn't even know she had that feature, but it bothered me. Here is a phone sitting on a bar and it's microphone picks up every fucking word we say?!?!

So now, not only does the government read our emails and listen to our phone calls, they MUST have access to that little microphone in that device almost every American has in their pockets.

If that doesn't bother you..........