PLETHORIC FRIDAY POST

FIRST, THE NEWS....

This is exactly what many people are secretly thinking...

And a good time was had by all...

Did you notice that the logo is not that of Mickey Mouse?

Well, it looks like they are ready...

That was all what the internet has to say about NK, but the "new" information that they "may" be able to deliver a nuke on a missile that was "accidentally" "released" from secret US documents should scare the holy fuck out of you. It's called propaganda, people, and we've seen this shit before.

Have you heard much about this? No? Me neither...

Well, it seems like there are threatened lawsuits for anyone who gets close enough to document it...including fly-overs by aircraft.


And this on the Iron Lady...

As I understand it, Thatcher broke up the labor unions who were choking the country to death. She made a lot of enemies.

MY WIFE HAS A PICTURE OF HER LAST BOYFRIEND AS HER SCREEN SAVER. WHEN I TOLD HER IT HURT MY FEELINGS, SHE SAID, “DON’T BE SILLY.”

A JOKE:
The American educational system.

Once, a lady in a bar yelled "Anyone know CPR?"

I yelled, "Hell, I know the WHOLE alphabet", and everyone laughed except that one guy...

 We all feel so sorry for the dog, then it dawns on us that people live there, too...

The divorce rate among my socks is truly astonishing.

Never use the fake illness of a child as an excuse to get out of something.

Most people are better at doing something if no one is watching.

 Oh, look, here are some boobs now...

All restaurants are drive-thru with enough horsepower.

The first time I got my nipple pierced, I was just trying to put on a nametag.

A bike you can drive in water...

At least once, I guess we’ve all stuck our dick up through the bottom of a popcorn box in a theater. I did it just once, cause my mom was appalled!

"This time I mean it."

How to burn 2000 calories in 30 minutes...

HA! This looks EXACTLY like that pizza I ordered in Germany. I asked for everything and it came with LETTUCE and EGGS!!!

Rule #1: If you HAVE to fight, punch first and punch hard.

(write that shit down...it's important)

 This 7-11 posts pictures of you if you steal from them...

Stand up to bullies. You’ll only have to do it once.

(see Rule #1 above)

 Somebody, some place found the porn that was ordered from inside the Vatican. And there was a lot of it.
I would love to tell you that it involved young boys, but I saw no evidence of that.

I would have said, "...put your penis in something..."
And I'm still having trouble remembering anything I haven't stuck my dick in.

A hammock is like a giant net for catching lazy people.

This is what happens when you blow bubbles in very cold weather...

MATH:
Billy has 32 pieces of bacon. He eats 28. What does he have now?
Happiness.
Billy has happiness.

Did you know that San Pedro, Honduras is the world's most dangerous city? I didn't. It's all gang related. This guy was shot, then set upon with machetes and STILL lived...

This is a fish that traveled all the way to California in the hull of a boat washed here after the tsunami...

If a street performer makes you stop walking, you owe him a buck.

You only get one chance to notice a new haircut.

This is Bo Diddley and he once stood at the urinal next to mine....and that awesome shit is true...

Let's do dogs....

At the beginning of time, right at the moment the big bang initiated, for the briefest of time, all energy, thus all matter was in the same place. Including my testicles.

One of my very own...

Watched "Inseparable", a Japanese movie starring Kevin Spacey in a very unusual role...

 Here's one of the more humorous subtitles...

That makes no sense. 

These ladies collected this from the beach in one day...

The harm this stuff does to marine life is astronomical.

I wonder how many of these South Korea has pointed toward the north...

There is a time and place for vegetarian meals.
The time is never and the place is in the trash.


I bet only 10% of Americans would understand this...

Never lie to your doctor. Never. Ever.

Men, read this shit...

As a father of two daughters, that sickens me.
28% of FEMALES think it's okay if she lets him touch her above the waist and 31% if she changes her mind. 

I liked this movie...especially her...

Don’t mention sunburns. Believe me, they know.

OOMV0...

If you have the right of way, TAKE IT.

When opening presents, no one likes a good guesser.

 Scientology, not even once...

Never fake a limp.

This is the way I look when someone takes my bet just a little too quickly...

I've been chatting online with this 13 year old girl. She's funny, flirty and sexy. Now she told me she's an undercover cop. How cool is that for someone her age?

Tears in weightlessness...

This is really not that dangerous. I've done it more than once...just ask Billy....

Always address everyone who carries a firearm professionally.

Whenever I watch a movie with Morgan Freeman and he's married and they show his wife, I always think she's not good enough for him.

I HAVE A "WITHOUT WORDS" POST TOMORROW...WHICH MEANS IT'S ONLY PICTURES FOR YOU PEOPLE TOO STUPID TO FIGURE THAT OUT ON YOUR OWN.