FRIDAY #1546

KIND OF NEWSY THINGS...

For Aaron...

Couple of pics from German flooding...

Is this a moveable levee? Never seen such a thing...

I bet this got A LOT of attention floating down the river...

This terrifying motherfucker is deep in the forrest along a hiking trail in Florida...

 It's fiberglass.

 This was the headline...

 I thought everybody knew they were doing this...I did or at least assumed so.

 From TV: 30 dead? On GoT that's called a wedding.

"Only 7% of couples who met online and subsequently married have so far separated or divorced, according to a study published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. The divorce rate overall is 40-50 percent."

Fucker broke the law to do this...

"The DHS has responded to a Freedom of Information Act request filed by the ACLU asking when and how it decides whose laptop to search at the border. It explained its legal rationale for conducting these searches with a blank page."

Why isn't this considered under the search and seizure clause and need a warrant? Is this what freedom is supposed to look like?

"I did not have sexual relations with that woman."

 Yes....yes you did.

Four billion tons of food are grown and raised worldwide every year. About 25% of that goes to waste. The good news is that there is near 100% utilization of doughnuts, bacon and chips.

Bacon: the gateway drug for former vegetarians.

UK health care system is a real mess. I won't take time to give details...might want to do some research to see what ours will soon become.

Hard to read, but worth the read...

(for Lara....and Bruce)

If this doesn't impress you...

...you are on the wrong blog.

A nose fixer...reduce your Ugly Tax...

Shit you just don't find on most humor sites...

Know who this is?

 Lenin without a beard.

Using their compact mirrors to better view the queen. Oh, my...

Fuck the queen.

This man looked so obviously confused...but no...

Indian-American artist Natvar Bhavsar is pictured on Wednesday with a selection of his work at his exhibition titled ‘Energy of Color’ at the FreedmanArt gallery on the Upper East Side.

It is not possible to tell you how much I love good bread...

 The article said the size differences and randomness of the holes is an indication that this is very good bread.

This child is wearing a South Park religious thingy....

Speaking of...

Egg Nog: Because milk isn't gross enough.

Oh, the irony...

Seat belt bottle opener...handy thing to know...

I don't know why this upsets me so much, but it does...

"How was the concert?"
"I don't know, but I got some great pictures."

On a related matter, I may have to stop wearing my new flip flops. The problem is, I forgot just how beautiful my feet are. I'm always being asked to stop so that passersby can photograph them. During lunch, one lady asked if I would put my foot on the table. I'm just not used to such attention.

That these nipples being allowed and her own nipples being taboo ought to really upset more people...

Really?

I've never skydived before, but I have zoomed in on Google Maps real fast.

IDF.

Winnie the Pooh and Jack the Ripper have the same middle name. Coincidence? I think not.

Know who this is?

 Mark Hamill.

I'd like to see that motherfucker fly across the room now.

This guy nails it every time!

One small painted gray shape and wa-la...

You might want to write this shit down:
It's easy to ignore sexism, racism and all the other isms when it works in your favor.
(just because I give you advice doesn't mean I'm smarter than you. It just means I've had more time to do more stupid shit)

How come nobody at Hogwarts got pregnant?


A bet that let's me know they think I'm bluffing...

A rather impressive Then And Now photographs...

Some times I'm not sure if I should take a nap or just bitch about how tired I am.

I so hope this is true...

One of my very own...

I hear yoga does amazing things for people who incessantly glorify yoga.

 HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Guys, don't even try to use Michael Douglas' cancer as an excuse for not going down on your woman.

Sweden?

My deodorant ran out mid application and my spare was a different scent. Now I have one armpit that smells like Sport and one that smells like Rainfall. I don't even know who I am anymore.
My wife accused me of being bi-scentual. 

I've done years of research on these, and this one is a 9.3...

Another OOMVO...

That caption won out over her saying: "Am I dating? Yes. I'm dating my vibrator and I think I'm in love."

My inner voice is giving me the silent treatment....which is not entirely a bad thing.

Situational awareness...Level: Novice....

I'm having phantom pains in my dignity.

Wrong place, wrong time...

 That would be really cool in 3D.

Pangea by the country...(Pangaea?)...

WTD (write this down):
The main goal in life is not to be found dead with money in your pocket.

THERE WILL BE A SHITTY POST TOMORROW.