BAD MOON A'RISIN' SATURDAY

NEWSY BITS...

Just when you thought the investigation into Ferguson cop Darren Wilson's shooting of an unarmed black teen couldn't get any more fucked up, it gets even more fucked up....

Who sets a Little Caesars on fire? Seriously.

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My sweet wife got her picture in the newspaper again...

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I was sitting on my normal stool at the bar when I woman sat down next to me and ordered two slices of pizza...one with double cheese and one with normal cheese. When her meal was delivered she ate them both as if there was nothing unusual about it.
Think about that.
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Dear New Zealand,
I didn't make that shit up. I ran across it during my 23rd hour of browsing the internet yesterday...and quite honestly I don't care who or what you guys down there stick your dick in.....just sayin'. 
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My bartender told me a story today about her having to go inside a gas station to pay her tab due to a pump malfunction. As she entered the store she noticed a woman walking toward the door, but deemed her "out of range" to have to hold the door for her. We've all done that. We have to make a split second decision as to what will, and what will not be rude.
Well, the woman took GREAT offense and stormed through the door with every expletive that could be applied to such a slight. 
So, I gave it some thought...as is my habit, and I came up with a solution to such awkward moments that we all face.
The three point line on basketball courts (#4)...

...should be painted around every door in America. There should be extensive research conducted to find out EXACTLY where a person will feel slighted if the door is not held open for them, then you can open the door, look back, and if the person is outside the "three point" line, then you have no obligation to hold the door and they have no right to be offended.
Problem solved.
You're welcome.
(my wife says I overthink things)

************* For Abby...

I didn't make that up, I just thought of you, of course, when I saw it.
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I don't know how this ended up on a lame Saturday post, but here it is...a reference that gives quick answers to some very serious science questions. If you have kids, let them dance around this site for a while...
http://www.worldscienceu.com/science_unplugged/featured
In discussing string theory, the man said that if you enlarged an atom to the size of the universe, then one string would be about the size of a tree.
Now, I don't care who you are, that's pretty fucking small.
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Music to scroll by...

CLIPS AND PICS TO MAKE YOU FEEL LESS STUPID ABOUT YOURSELF....

 I watched that a dozen times and laughed every single time.

This guy tried to fuck with a cop with a magic trick involving a bag of weed...

Never fuck with an armed, bald, fat cop with sunglasses on his head.

And the drunk fat guy...

 ...nails it.

This fat drunk girl...

...nails her friend.

I wonder how much he makes a year...

Phrasing...

Oh, yeah, let's let our kids fuck with a caged beast...

He might as well kiss that sportsmanship award good bye.

That sort of reminds me of that bartender when I forgot to pay my bar tab.

All I can think of, is that if my wife had had a son, he would do shit like that.

Nice moves...

The old "Avoid Death Shuffle" at its best.

This is one of those birds, that if it was carrying a drink, could do that and not spill a drop....

Is that an anarchy shirt?

Because, fuck grandma, that's why....

Welcome home, bitch....

Smart guy...

 ...nobody wants to fight a naked guy.

Now that I've healed nicely, this is the only reason I still use a cane...