About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Monday, April 18, 2016

MONDAY #2676

One Of My Very Own…
 


ralph.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com 



Just found out that University of California(Davis) has tried to pay $175000 for this image to not appear when you search it on google.


Just a reminder of the fun the world had at this jerks expense.







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POLITICS






That would be me.

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Every time somebody has said to me, "I don't really worry about invasions of privacy because I don't have anything to hide," I always say the same thing to them. I get out a pen, I write down my email address. I say, "Here's my email address. What I want you to do when you get home is email me the passwords to all of your email accounts, not just the nice, respectable work one in your name, but all of them, because I want to be able to just troll through what it is you're doing online, read what I want to read and publish whatever I find interesting. After all, if you're not a bad person, if you're doing nothing wrong, you should have nothing to hide. Not a single person has taken me up on that offer."


 - Glenn Greenwald, Why privacy matters
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How come I didn't make this connection?


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A huge landslide collapsed the bank of a river and sent water flooding down the hillside in Kumamoto, Japan
Have you seen the scale of the land displacements there? That earthquake was equal to that quake in Alaska that was...I mean...damn!


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I had a long talk with a dear young friend today who just returned from her honeymoon. There seems to be real assholes in every family. Her's being her husband's sister who is a real bitch. I have a person like that in my extended family. She fucks up every situation in which she participates. I find that rather sad. But I still hate her.




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Babies are the most helpless and vulnerable of humans, it's fucked up that they're the only humans you're allowed to just throw into the air.


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Let’s start with car stuff.
 The People’s Car was designed in WWII Germany. Just about every part of the car can be replaced by the owner, including: the engine which only has four bolts; the fenders has a few screws; and the bumpers are a breeze. The down side is its uni-body, which has a habit of rusting out and can’t be replaced.


This was the caption for this image:


“I researched this car for a while, but couldn't find anything. Any European have any idea?”


When I lived in Germany the highway patrol drove Porches with a large sunroof. The story I was told was that since there were no speed limits, their primary job was to get to accident sites and direct traffic (through the sunroof) until the ambulance got there.
That looks like something with a similar agenda.



And the next time you feel stupid, remember this guy...

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Opportunity saw a dust devil in Endeavor Crater on Mars




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Yes, life is meaningless, but some of the food is decent.


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This is Cecilia Payne-Gaposchkin.


Since her death in 1979, the woman who discovered what the universe is made of has not so much as received a memorial plaque or obituaries mention her greatest discovery…Everyone knows Charles Darwin discovered evolution and Albert Einstein discovered the relativity of time. But when it comes to the composition of our universe, textbooks simply say the most abundant atom in the universe is hydrogen. And no one ever wonders how we know? Cecilia Payne-Gaposchkin, a truly extraordinary woman.


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A little fun with language.


That says No Step On Snake…I think.



Yeah, right…


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[god creating an pigeon] What if I gave this piece of shit wings?


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Remember this stupid bastard?



Well, the internet remembers him…
 
 


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This zany bastard…


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When her hand game is weak…





“Remember, ladies, practice, practice, practice.”



Speaking of the almighty penis…


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I'd rather have a crying baby on my flight than a white dude who just did a trip to Thailand and won't stop talking about it.


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About aliens…



This is exactly what I think will happen when we find intelligent life in the universe.

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Ladies, god thinks you are second class citizens.


From a bible site:
Q: What reason do you see for why God created woman?
A: It was not good for man to be alone. God created us to be man's helper, to meet his every need, body mind and soul, that we might grow together in spirit and in truth, that we might encourage one another and spur one another on in all things. And that we might more fully in our finite minds understand the inner workings of God and His role in our lives. In women, we see humanity in its weak form, easily misled and beguiled, in man; we see God's strength and unswerving authority. We need man's headship and guidance to keep ourselves from falling away, and man needs God's headship and guidance to show them how to lead us in all truth and righteousness.


Have those people never heard of Margaret Thatcher?




Yeah, I guess suppressing an entire gender is a thorn.



And we wonder why we have misogamy like this....


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When you really, really want somebody dead…


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Parents abandoned him because they thought he was a witch. White lady took him in like a stray dog.
 
 

Speaking of...

Orangutan saves baby bird.

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Take my wife…..please.




My wife once applied to Bonwit Teller for a salesclerk job and after her interview she was hired to head the largest department in the store.



The other day the wife and I were eating a chili cheese burger at a hundred year old bar that is going out of business soon. Someone said something to me but I didn’t hear, but I did hear my wife say, “He can’t hear a damn thing I say.”
So I looked at the bar owner and said, “That’s because I’ve already heard everything the bitch has to say…..twice. Wife threw a french fry at me.


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A couple of things I know about fighting dogs.
 I was told by actual dog fighters that there were three types of fighting dogs. The leg dog immediately goes for its opponent’s legs, a break would leave the dog helpless to further attacks. Then there is the throat dog, which is rather self-explanatory. You can see those two traits illustrated in the dogs’ behavior above. The third kind of dog that bites anywhere on the body, clamps down and simply won’t let go until its opponent exhausts himself trying to free himself. I think the white dog is such a dog.

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 I have a new label I’ve been pasting all over town. It says: QUIT WHINING.


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Shit you don’t see every day…



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Somewhere in Italy…


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A repost worth seeing again…


That is one really, really pissed off monkey.


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While memes are a great gateway to wasting your life away online, they're not for everyone. Ask your doctor if memes are right for you.

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