About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Tuesday, August 16, 2016


One Of My Very Own…



How 'bout those Cubs? I've been dragged kicking and screaming into the Cubs Fandom and finally, this year, we could actually do...what every Cubs fan says every year.
On a related note, I have an old friend with whom I place an over/under bet on how many games our
Gamecocks will win this year. The line is 5 1/2 and I took over. Wish me luck.
Imagine living your peak years in your field with a Bolt or a Phelps or an Ali to compete against. No matter that you are better than other past competitors in your field...you just didn't win.

And now this...
In an American city. Think about that.
All for the shooting of an armed fleeing felon.
Finally a worse love story than Twilight

Kurdish peshmerga soldier carrying a child away from ISIS.

This is awesome! Wait for it to load if need be...The gravity-defying physics of Simone Biles

On my last flight I watched a woman in front of me pull out her hair and eat it until I fell asleep. Can't do that in first class.


I was told ever since I can remember that I should quit asking so many questions.

I've been asked more than once why I give a shit what people believe and just leave them alone. Well, that would be a lot easier if they would just leave me alone and stop fucking with me. But further, some parents spend good money for a therapist to get their child to stop believing in his imaginary friend, that it is a waste of the child's mind, etc. Well, just consider me one of society's therapists and I'm free.


You know, nobody sits at home and says, "Hey, let's char some marshmallows in the oven." Yet it's almost irresistible when camping. What's up with that?

Writing Prompt:
In a time when self-driving cars become a standard thing, suddenly all of them start heading to the same destination.



I really like this one...

The Snake River and canyon near Twin Falls, Idaho

Leaves me in awe...still.

Something you don't see every day...

Girl: Gonna keep having sex with this guy until he changes for me.
Guy: Can't believe she keeps having sex with me. I better not change a thing.



The genetic diversity of the English bulldog is so low that cross-breeding is recommended to reverse the various health issues associated with the breed, according to a new study.
I could say that about a lot of breeds. I call it cruel.

Nuts are a good source of protein.

I'll see your girlie balls and raise you these...

Looks rather shopped, don't it...

A crocodile at a zoo in the southern Taiwan city of Kaohsiung holds the forearm of a zoo veterinarian in its teeth, April 2007. Surgeons in Taiwan have reattached a vet's arm, after it was bitten off by a crocodile as he tried to give it an anesthetic injection. His attacker is one of a pair of Nile crocodiles kept at Shoushan zoo. Nile crocodiles are known to be man-eaters, but are also listed as an endangered species.
(please don't tell me that's not true and that is not a croc but an alligator)

Then there's these sadistic assholes...

They do that just for fun.
And don't even think about defending the murdering bastards by reminding us that they also murder pests...

That's like saying Jeffrey Dahmer wasn't that bad because he was doing his part for population control.


WASHINGTON—In what experts are describing as the most marked improvement in American academic performance in decades, a study released Friday by the U.S. Department of Education has found that the majority of the nation’s students have attained the skills necessary to recognize math.


Curiosity has gotten smarter: the Mars rover now has the capability to select ChemCam laser targets autonomously, allowing the four year-old prospector to choose its own targets for remote evaluation.

Israel Proves the Desalination Era is Here

One of the driest countries on earth now makes more freshwater than it needs. The turnaround started in 2007, when low-flow toilets and shower heads were installed nationwide and the national water authority built innovative water treatment systems that recapture 86 percent of the water that goes down the drain and use it for irrigation.

A single asteroid can contain US$20 trillion worth of metals.

These include gold, iridium, silver, osmium, palladium, platinum, rhenium, rhodium, ruthenium and tungsten for transport back to Earth; iron, cobalt, manganese, molybdenum, nickel, aluminum, and titanium for construction; water and oxygen to sustain astronauts; as well as hydrogen, ammonia, and oxygen for use as rocket propellant.

Temporary Olympic-sized, above-ground swimming pool being installed in a stadium in Omaha

The problem some people don't seem to understand is that standing really high up makes many people (me) dizzy.

A couple of silly things...

A sign of the times...

There are no atheists in parking lots where you've dropped your phone face down on the asphalt.



If you enjoy waking up and checking to see what died, get a fish tank.



Stranger Things Parody

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition.

If you don't like Stranger Things, then...

Torn this election season. I think it would be awesome to have the first woman president. But I'm also curious about the Trumpocalypse.



simon beer said...

Wasn't it St Augustine of Hippo who first asked what God had been doing before the divine creation? Stephen Hawking, maybe - but some considerable time later?

Ralph Henry said...

I have no idea. I just thought it was a cool thing to say.

Ninja Grrrl said...

Mr.Beer,regarding your profile pic, it must be said - you give good head.Respect.

simon beer said...

Thanks Ninja Grrrl I'll get around to updating my website soon so you can see some images of recent artwork (www.simonbeer.net)

It is a pretty cool question - I think I'd like to ask God how long it took for him (her,it) to finish the design stages and decide that it would be a good idea to move the project forwards into production and is it finished yet? Almost everything in the universe / multiverse seems to be in a state of flux: entropy, evolution etc so clearly nothing has been made perfect - or it wouldn't need to keep changing errr would it?

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