About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Friday, November 25, 2016

FRIDAY #2895

One Of My Very Own...


EMAIL: ralph.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com

The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald

Hopefully one of those will load properly.






Thanksgiving Day Parade in Arkansas

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The investigation confirms the probe misinterpreted sensor data, which made it think it was below ground level, when in reality the module was still at an altitude of around 3.7km.
This prompted Schiaparelli to jettison its parachute too early and to fire its landing rockets for just three seconds.
These actions put the probe into a free-fall that led to its destruction.
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California's perma-drought has led to the death of more that 102 million trees (1/3 of the state's trees) in the last six years.



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America is considered the greatest country in the world by people who haven't travelled much.

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2016 FAREWELLS


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I found this accurate...

Can you think of that many? I could not.

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Want to guess what these are before you scroll lower?

Fully inflated horse lungs.

Speaking of horses...


Speaking of warriors...
Like riddles? Think about this counter-intuitive fact:


I was brought up to respect warriors...and I still do.


I have owned several great military weapons, like this German bayonet...

It had a metal sheath and it sounded so cool when you pulled it out.

But my upbringing may not have been in the best interest of the world at large.
This is called the Shroud. Bristol UK. The 19,240 individually hand stitched shroud bodies each represent one of the lives lost on just the first day of the Somme.


The FIRST DAY! 19,240 !!!!

And losses were much greater in other countries...


We all know how war can heighten our excitement and make us feel like we have to prove something...

But what if....what if dead warriors were not considered heroes? What if they were considered mere dupes of the ruling class who were getting filthy rich off of every meal you ate in the field, every bullet you fired, and ever aircraft that went down in flame.
One of my only trusted truisms is: If there was no profit in war, there would be no war.

Answer to the helmet riddle: This is because more people survived a head injury to report it!

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FOOD MATTERS
This is a modern German street vendor.


Back in the late 60s in Germany, they just put them in a sliced bun, but I have often said that if it weren't for them I would have starved to death. Back then they cost a quarter (one mark-same thing...same as a beer.)
But my vendor meal of choice was the Currywurst.

I have eaten gallons of that very meal. And yes the French fries came with mayonaise and believe it or not, it is wonderful.

Here in America a guy swears this is the only way to eat hotdogs...


Hot dogs cut this way cook perfectly straight, has crevices for condiments, get done fast...plus it looks cool. The trick is to put a kabob stick through it first and after spiral cutting you slide it out.

After showing you what an automatic could do to a wiener, here's what a revolver can do...


You want food advice? I got food advice...


Can't end this topic yet...


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My daughter licked a frog once. She didn't turn into a princess but she did turn into an ambulance ride.

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THINGS FOR CHILDREN

You can't imagine how I learned to change my voice for all the characters in that book. But then I just started to make up my own stories and ran into a problem. Let's just say I have...two very different daughters. One would love the stories and the other would find the flaws in the plot.
Welcome to fatherhood.

Yeah, I would buy this for my kid, then take it in my office and never get any work done...


I don't know if this is appropriate for kids, but this guy commutes 5 miles every day and has attached a pool noodle to his bike to remind drives to give him so room.


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So, if he gets divorced for the third time...Does Melania get to keep the White House?

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VARIOUS MAPS

The wonderful couple across the street - both school teachers - have been trying for years to adopt a child...any gender, any race, even handicapped, and they still haven't been allowed. Nobody can figure it out, but I have a very cynical theory. If the placement people are not very bright people and they have no incentive whatsoever to place all the kids...otherwise they are out of a job. There is also the race thing. Black people don't want to give black kids to white parents...or that's my read from where I sit.

Look at this and tell me what you would do with this information.


Here is more detail...

Here's my take: The building code should be drastically different in each region, especially mobile homes. Tornados don't target mobile home parks; mobile homes just allow air under them, which is lethal.

I know I have discussed this ad nauseam...


But talking about it has taught me something.

There are so many people that think they have it all figured out. I know I do not. I welcome criticism as long as it is logical and well thought out. The "arguments" over electoral college pros and cons has taught me one thing: NOBODY KNOWS.

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THINGS TO THINK ABOUT

I'll even go farther; why is it forbidden to release the "victim's" name and not the "accused" (innocent until proven guilty) prep? That ain't right.
I am against the death penalty for many reasons, but the main one is that we know 10% of the judged guilty are, in fact, innocent. About the same percentage holds up in claim of rape, yet we don't hesitate to release the guys name, but never the girls. Help me out here, Gentle Reader. One of you may have experiences that I do not.



When I tell my doctor I drink at least 6 beers a day they seem stunned. None of them seem to understand (even after I explain) that I drink the absolute lowest alcohol content beer shy of alcohol-free. Whatever.





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COINS

God only knows how long this took...



And...


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Drugs are never the answer kids. Unless the question is "Why have you been checking under the carpet for lizards for 3 days straight?"

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HEADLINES YOU MAY HAVE MISSED





The best teacher I ever had was a big fat guy who wore shoes when in the school, but nowhere else. When I got a job in the grocery store I would see him in there barefoot when there was snow on the ground. I loved that guy.




Speaking of...


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Now it's the scientists' turn to hide and the Higgs boson has to find them.

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SHIT YOU PROBABLY DIDN'T KNOW




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People being silly...


People being very serious...

New Zealand high school students treat their retiring teacher to intense traditional Haka farewell.
I find that very moving.

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Laziness is the mother of all bad habits, but ultimately she is a mother and should be respected.

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And believers see no illogic in that. Pity.

1 comment:

Ninja Grrrl said...

I don't know if it's still true, but I know some about how adoption used to work. Generally speaking, babies were in high demand, period. I am guessing your chart shows all children in need of a family.

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