About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Sunday, November 20, 2016

SUNDAY #2890

One Of My Very Own…


EMAIL: ralph.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com




drop kick me Jesus...because it's Sunday.

This next one is a test load...

Today in History: November 18th 1978
This is what happens when you are not allowed to ask the tough questions.
Like: Can you prove it?
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I'm so disgusted with people just making shit up to make their point.

That never happened.
And...

Laughable, but some people forward shit like that.

But there is plenty of information with the real news.

That's true, by the way.

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Today at my bar the bartender told me that there was a guy who, because of complications of throat cancer, had to fed himself through a tube directly in his stomach. He ordered a beer and a shot glass, then using the shot glass proceeded to pour a little beer in a cup on the end of his stomach tube. I said that I would have put the beer in my mouth, swirl it around, spit it in the shot glass, THEN pour it directly in my stomach. My bartender told me that he, in fact, took a taste from time to time. Then I said, Hell, he could drink the cheapest skankiest beer and it would make no difference. She laughed and said he had already had four Heinekens.
I found that funny.
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Crossword clue: Lamb or Bacon piece
I'll give you the answer after you have mulled it over for a while.



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Is a person diagnosed with a Multiple Personality Disorder able to get a group rate from their therapist? Just asking for some friends.

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It don't get more Southern than this.
This is the way it is presented...


Then it is served like an old fashion pig pickin'...


The reason it was curled up was so it could fit on the grill.

And just in case you have never tasted Gator, it's delicious. Tastes like chicken if a chicken was a reptile.

Speaking of meal preparation...


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Crossword clue: Lamb or Bacon piece
Answer: Essay.
I got it early only because I already had the second letter as S.

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You give the internet one piece of raw meat and it will chew it to death...


No genre seems immune...


Then there's the guy that dressed the neighborhood kids up like the cast from Walking Dead.


Cute.


So very cute.


But then it got ugly...


So very, very ugly...


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OUR WORLD GOING TO SHIT
These are our allies in the fight against the most evil group of people since the Nazis and Pol Pot.


Iraqi special forces soldier trying to locate a sniper...


Then there's this bitch.

I read that the reason that we don't just kill this motherfucker is that China won't let us. They (China) have enough problems without millions of North Koreans pouring over the border just to get something to eat.

PAY ATTENTION: Nationwide child sex trafficking sting.

Operation Cross Country is part of the FBI’s Innocence Lost National Initiative. Since its creation in 2003, the program has resulted in the identification and recovery of more than 6,000 children from child sex trafficking.
The FBI says 239 child-sex traffickers and their associates were arrested and 82 children were rescued from Oct. 13 to 16 as part of Operation Cross Country X.
A personal observation: If it is that hard to catch those monsters in America where 99.99% of the people would rat out someone they suspected of that, then how hard must it be elsewhere where a whole lot of people profit from it?

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LANGUAGE



Colorized and restored photo from WW1


Abode-challenged man = homeless guy.





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COMMENT SENT TO FOLIO OLIO
A perfect job for anyone who hates people, is designing automated phone systems. Ideally the 'customer' should have to wait in a queue whilst all of their phone credit expires; have to listen to a monotone voice tell them how IMPORTANT their call is; have to listen to 20 options, none of which covers their problem; and finally, get cut off 30 seconds after finally getting to speak to a human being.

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SO, WHAT HAVE ARTISTS BEEN UP TO LATELY?




And yes, today I will call photoshoppers artists...


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SO, WHAT HAVE THE SCIENTISTS BEEN UP TO LATELY?
Selfie with a James Webb Space Telescope lens panel.


Finally got the gif to load of the brick-laying robot...


Fishbots.


This is a flash light from hell, that when on maximum setting will set fires...


Or cook eggs.


Mammoth footprints found in the dried up lakebed of St Mary's reservoir in Alberta, Canada.


This guy is not a scientist, but it fits here so well.
A Siberian man harvests mammoth tusks from the permafrost where layers are newly exposed by arctic waves.


I have the strangest feeling I've asked this before, but even if it is a repost I didn't receive a reply the first time.
This was posted as a job because the gel farts after being shot.

What I want to know is if that small explosion at the end is a caused by compression like that fancy fire starter.

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RANDOM SOCIAL CONCERNS
Protesting bunnies.


Why didn't those women just start their own mansion?


How is this a bad thing? So once a slum always a slum?! Please.


Welcome to America. Need proof? Read on.


Apparently, it’s a tradition at Harvard for the guys on the soccer team to rank female soccer players on how hot they are. For this, Harvard President ended their season, forfeiting their remaining games.




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THINGS I HAVE HAD PERSONAL EXPERIENCES WITH
I have been very poor before. When both my wife and I were in college and had a child, we had to save up for months in order to buy a used washing machine. Then after a couple of months, it just stopped.

I knew nothing about washing machines, but I turned it around and took a look at intake and exhaust hose and finally identified the pump. I took it apart and found a tiny baby sock. Removed it, replaced the pump and it worked for years.

I always nap with the TV on some science show, then as I'm falling asleep I mute it.

But sometimes I hit the wrong button and it fucks everything up. I'm thinking of doing the above to mine remote.

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One Minute Time Machine

It is an excellent 5 minutes video about a guy who creates the machine and tries to pick up a woman.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vBkBS4O3yvY

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"We've been 99 cents for more than 15 years now," said a spokesman for the family-owned and -operated company. "It's a big part of our overall strategy, and our business model is such that we don't advertise for example, and we put those costs towards giving our consumer the value they want and expect."

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NATURE

Giant balls of ice formed naturally when small pieces of arctic ice are affected by wind and waves.


Wow!


Let me go ahead and express my thanks to Sir David Attenborough while he is still alive.

I've learned so much from that guy. He threw around the word evolution when it was not a widely accepted theory. He turned my life around.

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SHIT YOU DON'T SEE EVERY DAMN DAY
Sometimes people invent things that don't need inventing...



That doesn't really fit in this section, but what the hell.

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October's cool because you can buy 60 Snickers, 48 beers, a hockey mask, chainsaw, 30 leaf bags and the cashier won't even acknowledge it.

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2 comments:

simon beer said...

The "colorised and restored" photograph from WW1 is actually a publicity shot from the brilliant BBC tv show "Blackadder". Specifically the final series "Blachadder Goes Forth" which aired in 1989. it is a historical sit-com, the final series being set in the First World War. The show mocks the stupidity of the First World War and the officer class specifically "Lions lead by donkeys" etc. I strongly recommend that you watch it. Whilst it is entertaining and very funny, I garuntee you will be moved by the ending of the last episode. Enjoy

Donk said...

The colorized WWI photo is actually from the British sitcom Blackadder Goes Forth. Second from right is actor Rowan Atkinson, and I believe Hugh Laurie is on the far right.

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