About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

TUESDAY #3096

One Of My Very Own...


DOWN ON THE CORNER


It is becoming harder and harder to find anything approaching quality humor online these days...either that or my sense of humor has evolved. So do me a favor and send me anything that you come across online or in real life that made you smile. I would really appreciate it very much.

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Deep in a Canadian mine, already “the world’s deepest base metal mine below sea level,” scientists have found pools of water that date back not millions but billions of years.
Water this old could have traces of ancient organisms that could give scientists clues about how life on earth worked all those years ago. 


I LIKE THIS POST.

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In all the movies, Santa never goes to the house directly next door. He always gets in his sleigh, goes way up in the air, then fucks off like 20 miles east.


LANGUAGE CAN BE FUN


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Of course he is, Sweetie.

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(did you notice they misspelled chute?)

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(It was explained that the firemen did it as a joke during a training exercise.)

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Is anyone really confident with how they say "Worcester Sauce?"


PEOPLE COPING

Dude had to take the service elevator to a party honoring him because black people couldn't use the regular hotel elevators. 
You think his grandchildren could forgive us white people? Why should they?

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Bus seat
That's like 10 years of farts being released.

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Let's revisit this drunk sumbitch...
He thinks his own reflection is another shopper blocking his way down the reflected aisle.

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I have observed that humans are very hard to kill.
Dress for the slide, not the ride.
But in his defense, the weird wind coming around that big rig may have pushed him over the line.

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A bus passing through a dangerous area in Rio, Brazil.
There are areas in Miami, Chicago, Detroit and LA where I would do the same thing.

Personal note:
"When you commute in the morning and see all those other people, do they look happy to you? Well, I make it a point to look happy every fucking minute because I am. No need to rob those people of a hint of what is possible." - RH

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Please watch this until the end...
God he hates that bitch with every fiber of his being.

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Best beer chair ever!
I'm thinking it would be fun on a cruise ship, also.

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In Russia firemen burn you.
Hello darkness my old friend.

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What happens when you bring a utility pole to a gun fight.
Is the inept shooter being left behind?
But just remember what I said about humans being pretty damn hard to kill.

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This is called a figure 8 race and I haven't see one in years.

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Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never quite describe the pain.


SCIENCE AND NATURE

I heard once that tornadoes are formed horizontally as hot air rolls over cooler air, then it drops down to vertical. This seems to show precisely that.
Anybody know anything about such things?

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Self-Launching Erection Devices (SLEDs) are capable of erecting 750 ton segments in under one hour. After the segment is secured, the SLED can launch itself to the next lifting position. A total of 452 segments were erected.
Yeah it looks cool, but it can only be used for four hours before they have to stop and consult a doctor.
Seriously, do you think trains travel in the middle of that thing, and if not, why not?
Also, notice that the new section does not match the existing sections of the curved part.

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Humans do shit like this all the time and I don't think we give it the appreciation it deserves.
Seriously, we drive in terrain never before possible and complain about delays due to maintenance. Shame, shame.

Speaking of snake shaped things...
A snake regurgitates large live snake.
The guy filming this frightened the snake and it had to void his stomach in order to flee...or so says the filmmaker. In the longer version the regurgitated snake lived, but I don't know for how long what with all the digestive acids and shit.

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How very wonderful.

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Server Room With A Seismic Isolation Floor During An Earthquake.
Did you notice the guy back there not giving a shit?

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A new study shows that 100% of criminals were once children.


ISRAEL



And guess why the Jews picked those areas to build the illegal settlements. That's where the water is. I think the Palestinians have every right to be pissed off. It reminds me of the US and Native Americans...placate them with treaties, then break the treaties.

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When I say I'm not doing anything, it means I have specifically put time aside to do nothing. Now go away.


ART


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I love B movies with monsters like this.

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Photoshop creativity


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How very magnificent.
If it's real.

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A great video from the Islamic world to spread a peaceful message and how their terror is not what God wants, or anyone wants. Really recommend watching it, it's only 3 minutes:

Please watch that.

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You never get the stalkers you want.

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“If at the end of a war story you feel uplifted, or if you feel that some small bit of rectitude has been salvaged from the larger waste, then you have been made the victim of a very old and terrible lie.” 

- Tim O'Brien, The Things They Carried

"The following is a list of troops I have known who are having a beer for us in Valhalla:"
SSgt Jeffrey Bray
SrA Mark Forester
Cpl. Sheldon Steele 
SSgt Jordan Lewis 
SrA Brad Smith 
SFC Wyatt Goldsmith 
SFC Benjamin Wise 
SSgt Matthew Pucino 
Cpl David O'Connor 

And for what?

Shirtless Anti-War protester Frank C. Plada will later die in Vietnam.

And he was right!! Anybody with a brain knew we couldn't win because the Viet Cong didn't mind dying for their cause...same as in Middle East today. We can't win, yet we have been fighting and dying on and off since 2001.

Today there isn't anyone who thinks there is a victory to be found in the Middle East. You know it. I know it. The generals know it. So why are our young men and women STILL FUCKING DYING?


There are unbelievably huge profits to be made in warfare. Look it up.

Unless you are this prick.
“Attempt to learn as much as you can. It will make no difference in the end.”

Well, shit.

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