One Of My Very Own
EMAIL: ralph.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com
NEWSY BITS
You may have guessed how I feel about the royal wedding.
Exactly.
I mean, this guy looks like a clown.
I watched a TV show that estimated that with salaries and security costs, etc, the monarchy costs the people 400 million US$ a year. But on the upside, it increases tourism by more than that. So basically, that smug motherfucker above is a tourist attraction.
So let's make fun of them.
Get it?
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Remember this asshole?
This is what greets him everytime he arrives or leaves his office.
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Damn.
EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED
I'm starting a candy company and it's going to be amazing.
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Bravo!
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I bet they are glad that happened BEFORE they lifted off.
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I once read a short story about a teenage girl writing about her dead grandfather. The man collected all kinds of string arranged in balls. And in his workshop was a box labeled "String too short to save."
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So it has begun.
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????
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Black magic fuckery
How the hell do you learn how to do that?
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My friend's dog did that; first over the 4' chainlink fence, then over a 6' chainlink fence, then over a 6' wooden privacy fence. Finally, he put an electric wire along the top of that fence and the dog just simply endured the shock and over it went.
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You finally get adopted, but this is your new owner.
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Shout out to the top 5 waters in the world: holy, tap, you can lead a horse to, baby with the bath and bridge over troubled.
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THINGS YOU MAY NOT KNOW
Saw that in a movie. It got me thinking about how mankind has been fighting erosion forever. Then I remembered those concrete pieces shaped like Jacks that someone invented.
They sort of fit together and most defuse the power of the waves.
Brilliant.
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Helicopter drill with tracers
How very, very accurate.
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This Visualized Design Shows You It's Impossible To Read All Term of Services of Your Social Apps.
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I assume necessary on grounds with sharp shards.
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Dutch ‘Boy Genius’ Who Said That He Could Get The Ocean To Clean Itself Proves That He’s Right.
He found that half the mass was nets or pieces of nets. There is a wonderful video in the site.
https://www.boredpanda.com/the-ocean-cleanup-project-boyan-slat/?cexp_id=9802&cexp_var=2&_f=featured
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My phone will never let me forget that I once texted "hahajaha".
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VINTAGE ADVERTISEMENTS
Why wouldn't he just stick them in his sock? That's what we did in the military.
But not all of them are benign.
And people actually believed that crap.
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If you've committed to pulling a door handle that clearly says push in front of people you must rip the handle completely off. You can't let a door own you.
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Joke: A guy was invited to rate the women passing by. The first rather attractive girl walked by and the guy said "7." The other guys rated 2, 3, and 3. The next girl was even better looking and the guy said, "9", and the other guys said 4, 4, 5. Finally the most beautiful woman any other them had ever seen walked by and the guy said, "10 and I would give her an 11 if I could." The other guys rated 6, 6, 7." The guy said, "What scale are you using if that woman only ranks a 6?" One of the other guys said, "We're using the Budweiser method." The guy asked what it was and was told: "We give the number of Clydesdales it would take to pull her off our face."
FUN WITH LANGUAGE
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FedEx would be a cool name for a restaurant for divorced couples.
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THE RAIN
Netflix movie I could tolerate. I'm thinking there is only one apocalypse script and they all just change the names and locations. There were so many things illogical in this movie that I felt I should share.
The rain is poison and kills you immediately. A scientist father gets his family to a bunker in the woods, then dons his hazmat suit and goes out to assist. He leaves his wife, teenage daughter and 10-year-old son with one paramount rule: to wit, NEVER OPEN THE DOOR!
He hadn't been gone 24 hours and the teenage girl opened the door resulting in the death of her mother.
While in the air-conditioned bunker they showered every day even though they weren't dirty.
But they always showered.
Once outside, they joined up with others and every single woman wore a bra; this after 6 years of living in the wilderness.
And even though there were bodies littering the landscape, they elected to bury their own dead.
Then there was the young kid who wore unadjusted braces on her teeth for all those years.
So with profound evidence that god hates us - 98% were dead - this jerk said
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Take your glasses off. Hold them up to a light to see if they're dirty. Now try to do it with your mouth closed.
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ART
Banksy x Basquiat
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Tape player, Aakash Nihalani
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Nice video:
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Remember the "Cross-Fold-Down Guy"?
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