About Me

My photo
I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Tuesday, May 1, 2018

TUESDAY #3414

One Of My Very Own

EMAIL: ralph.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com



SHIT I DIDN'T KNOW YESTERDAY

Innovation at its finest.
I didn't even know that was an option.

===0===

Ok, a show of hands: who here's been eaten by a hippo? Anyone? No? Then you'll want to keep reading because Chris Broughton has and his story is frigging horrific.

===0===

What I've never understood is voting in a communist government whose first order of business is to abolish free and open elections.

===0===

I would use that hole to zip tie it up under the car.

===0===

Why Do Many Historic Buildings in The UK Have Bricked Up Windows?
There was a time in Great Britain when having windows in homes and buildings were prohibitively expensive. That time began in 1696 with the introduction of the much-despised window tax, that levied a tax on property owners based on the number of windows or window-like openings the property had. The details of the tax kept changing with time, but the basic premise was that the more windows the house had, the more tax the owner had to pay. In the eyes of the legislature, the window tax was a brilliant way to put the burden of tax on the shoulder of the upper class. The rich usually had larger houses with more windows, and so were liable to pay more taxes. Poor people, on the other hand, lived in smaller houses and so paid less. To make the system even more attractive to the poorer class, those houses with fewer than ten windows were exempted from the window tax altogether.

This may not be the best image to illustrate this, but they also used to tax the square footage of the house, so many times the upper floors were larger.

<>
Women keep a special corner of their hearts for sins they have never committed.

<>


SHOW BUSINESS

I read that this is just another example of intellecturally funny British TV programs.
And here in America we have Honey Booboo, Duck Dynasty, and the Kardashians.

===0===

Some people get on a stage and demonstrate strange abilities such as this.
Question: Do you suppose he has backup snakes in case one gets ill or eaten by a cat or something?

===0===

 Comedian who's a dead ringer for televangelist Joel Osteen makes the most of his curse.

I've always hated him.
I'm on record despising him.

===0===

The new Lost In Space...I like it.
Rather good acting.
And I absolutely love telling people my daughter is a rocket scientist.
But then there's this prick.
Oh, he's doing a good job in the acting, but his character must have been modeled after Carl in Walking Dead. To get him to for sure do A just tell him he is strictly forbidden to do A. I've watched a whole year worth of series and he has NEVER obeyed ANY instruction.

Of course the star of the show is the robot and it is pretty badass.

It is a repentant assasin and, well, it gets complicated.

And mutually shared international gesture is now interplanetary.

===0===

How the hell do you practice something like that?

Speaking of vehicles...


<>
When you wish upon a star, your dreams do come true, but because of the distance, not for millions of years.

<>


VARIOUS VEHICLES

Those rovers in Lost In Space are great!
Oh, I know the body is just fiberglass, but who cares. I would love to have one.
They have a dozen or so in the movie, all of the same design and wonderful.

===0===

Well hell, if you have one guy per job, it ought to be fast.

===0===

Man solved the problem for, like, a dollar.

===0===

I think this is a great idea.
They have a divided highway in South Carolina that has had an old nonoperative police car parked in the median for twenty years.

===0===

I'll bet money this was "acquired" through civil forfeiture.

===0===

 Holy shit that looks fun.

===0===

I guess I'm allowed to call that a vehicle...
Something about teaching an old dog.

<>
I went to a Job Fair one time and had zero rides and some kind of World's Saddest Man exhibit.

<>



THE WORLD IS FULL OF ODDITIES


===0===

Fast ain't it?

===0===

At first, I thought that was four black men.

===0===

The main takeaway from this is that we all laugh in the same language.

===0===


===0===

I have never seen this before.
Do you think the dog is starving or is it trained to doo that?

===0===

Ukrainian parliament golden ratio.
One would think with all their problems, they could work together. That really disappoints me.

===0===

Every man in America is thinking the exact same thing I'm thinking right now.

===0===

Sammy Sosa really living his life as a one-man Neapolitan Ice Cream.
Speaking of white people...


<>
Ever wiped your ass with your shirttail so that your wife would be the one to discover the empty toilet paper roll and replace it?

<>



SERIOUSLY, IS THERE ANY HOPE FOR WHITE PEOPLE?


But wait, there's more...

===0===

 Under no circumstances can you be seen asking for directions: Man Rule #41.

===0===

Jesus.

===0===

Watch his facial expression.

===0===


===0===


===0===

"Just showing off" means something entirely different to white people.

===0===


===0===


===0===

===0===



<>
I always walk my dog very early in the morning to increase my chances of being the one to discover a dead body.

<>


<>

===0===

GYM EDITION


===0===


===0===


===0===



===0===


===0===


===0===


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Any chance you could give us a listing of all the rules? Like Rule #39, #41, etc.

If you’ve actually thought them all up that’d make a great post. If not... then why the heck not?

Keep it up, the good work.
-Paul



-Paul

Random Post

Random Posts Widget

Blog Archive