One Of My Very Own
EMAIL: ralph.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com
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BUY RALPH A BEER
Dano's Pizza
3008 Rosewood Drive
Columbia, SC 29205
HUMOROUS LANGUAGE
Look carefully...
I know that is silly but I like the look on his face.
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Uh....okay.
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I notice ackward wording like this all the time.
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When you just give up...
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*MNBT
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Which of the f's in 'Jeff' is silent?
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THOUGHT PROVOKING LANGUAGE
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Why don't we demand that?
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I assume we have all done that.
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True Story
In an anti-drug workshop in elementary school, a child said that her parents grew weed in their backyard. After the teacher called the parents the child showed them what she meant.
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I am of the opinion that if most of your students fail your class, it is the teacher's fault.
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Here's why:
A famous artist once said that the problem with poverty is that it takes all your time.
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You guys, I checked. Wolves can't blow houses down, even if they are just made of straw and sticks. It's all anti-wolf propaganda started by Big Pork.
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INTERNATIONAL OBSERVATIONS
Peak view of the Mount Everest.
The mountain is a trash dump and it's those people's fault.
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One of the biggest miscalculations of all time.
It's called fighting the present war with the tactics of the last war.
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Union of Soviet Socialist Republics, a former communist country in eastern Europe and northern Asia; established in 1922; included Russia and 14 other soviet socialist republics; officially dissolved 31 December 1991.
Communism and socialism are economic and political structures that promote equality and seek to eliminate social classes. The two are interchangeable in some ways but different in others. In a communist society, the working class owns everything, and everyone works toward the same communal goal.
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Think of what the other people thought when the first person to ever dance just started doing it?
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STUPID PEOPLE AND ONE ANIMAL
Could that possibly be her first time to pump gas?
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Have you ever been in this much of a hurry?
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Wait for it....
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That's called gay. You are gay.
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"Thank you for letting me sleep with your sister."
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An example of believing your own bullshit.
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Why two?
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It doesn't know how to drink milk.
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Me after learning something literally 5 min ago: Everybody else who doesn’t know this thing is an idiot.
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IMPRESSIVE PEOPLE AND THINGS
Adrian Cronauer was a United States Air Force sergeant and radio personality whose experiences as an innovative disc jockey on American Forces Network during the Vietnam War inspired the 1987 film Good Morning, Vietnam. Yesterday he died at the age of 79.
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I watched this movie.
It had a Cracker Jack cast.
And this was in the closing credits.
The film did not impress me.
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Feeling too good about yourself and need something to worry about?
Putin and Trump are in control of thousands of those. Sleep tight.
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"I love car chase action scenes."
- Said no moviegoer ever...except when watching Blues Brother.
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THINGS I HAVE LEARNED RECENTLY
When a crab or lobster dies, the bacteria that helps it digest starts working its way out of the digestive system and into the meat. This doesn't happen right away, but it makes the raw meat turn rancid very quickly. Cooking them live ensures you kill that bacteria at the same time you kill the crustacean.
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Blackjack is the only game that when you learn how to play they won't let you in the game.
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Ladies, write that shit down!
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Do you think they meant to do that?
The way the middle guy almost lost the top of his skull I doubt it.
The way the middle guy almost lost the top of his skull I doubt it.
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[ ALFALFA ]
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