FOLIO OLIO: SATURDAY #3810

One Of My Very Own

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EMAIL:

ralh.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com

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Liverpool/Tottenham today. My money is on Liverpool.
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PEOPLE NOT LIKE YOU AND ME

"It's not a flamethrower, it's a roofing torch with an air rifle casing around it. In fact, it even says on it 'not a flamethrower'."
- Elon Musk.
^^A1^^

^^A2^^

^^A3^^

Never go full Australian.
^^A4^^

^^A5^^

Watch how his mood changes when the ice cold water reaches his balls...

^^A6^^

So far this year is like trying a new wine in a bar and you hate it, but the bartender asks you to try it one more time and give it a chance, so you do and you still hate it, then the bartender hits you in the teeth with an ashtray.

SOCIAL CONCERNS

During our last roadtrip, we had to go through Baltimore. It looked like a fortified medieval city. There were bars on even the church windows including the stained glass.
Upon returning I told a guy I was afraid my car would break down and I would surely be mugged. He asked if it was just because they were black and I said, "No, every time I would pass a group of young men they would scream, 'If yo car breaks down, white boy, I'm gonna mug yo ass!'"
^^B1^^

Rape is so common on trains in India that special cars are set aside just for women.

That's the same place where mother's drown female babies.
I believe that the punishment for getting caught raping a woman must be far too lenient.
^^B2^^

I will never understand this country's fear of that weed. I would venture to say that every single lawmaker smoked weed in college. I personally don't know one single person who hasn't smoked it.
And it's not like the bible forbids it. I just don't get it.
^^B3^^

With funny kids like that, there is hope for the future.
^^B4^^

On his wedding day, I asked my soon to be son in law if they sold men's shirts where he bought the one he was wearing. He laughed and said that my ex-wife bought it for him, then he showed me that he was wearing two different cuff links out of defiance.
^^B5^^

Tesla's 'Sentry Mode' captures two pricks keying and denting his car.

Can I assume it is motion activated?
^^B6^^

This truck made it under all the signs with only inches to spare. What amazed me was that NOT ONE of the cars tried to warn him even though many passed him.
^^B7^^

I get really offended when people tell me I'm going to hell for being an atheist because they're overlooking all the perfectly valid reasons I'm going to hell.

SHIT YOU DON'T COME ACROSS OFTEN

Oh my.
^^C1^^

^^C2^^

A guy was asked what the weirdest thing to happen to him during sex...

^^C3^^

"The force is strong with this one, Luke."

^^C4^^

Monkey see, monkey do...grand theft auto...

^^C5^^

Do you think that snail can actually see that far?
^^C6^^

^^C7^^

Must be El Chapo's kids...

^^C8^^

The picture fucked me up for a second.

^^C9^^

Looks a little fake to me...interesting but fake.

*MNBT

^^C10^^

What Are These Shoes Made Of?

A. Metal
B. Endangered Species
C. Human Flesh
D. Foreskin

^^C11^^

The best part of hand washing dishes is jerking off the silverware.

STEM MATTERS

^^D1^^

And that is why students in elementary school are turned on to games early on.
^^D2^^

[verification needed]
^^D3^^

That's scary as hell.
^^D4^^

If you were applying for a job a NASA would you admit that you thought the following is factual?

When it comes to genocide, god makes that bitch on GoT look like a lightweight. But the point is, would you ever talk to your scientist co-workers about 600-year-old people and all the other weird shit your parents told you were true? Start off with your undying belief that there was once...and only once, a talking snake who fucked it up for the rest of us. Go ahead. I dare you.
^^D5^^

A woman in Whole Foods asked how I was and I said okay how are you and she said, "It is beautiful in my soul today." And that is why I never go to Whole Foods.