One Of My Very Own
When the pirate is about to cum...
That hospital dictates what clothing its employees can and can not wear, they can prohibit perfumes, they forbad them from smoking...the list goes on. This last insistence is just one more.
THOUGHTS ON MINIMUM WAGE
Many languages—including Turkish, Finnish, Estonian, Hungarian, Basque, Armenian, Bengali, and Tagalog—have no gendered pronouns.
I once opened my bank statement and discovered that someone had deposited $10,000 into my account and it sure as shit wasn't me. A few days later I get a call from my father asking if his deposit had been deposited into my account. I confessed that it had been. When he called the bank the manager suggested I just write my father a check for the amount of the error. My father insisted that since it was the bank's fault then the bank must fix it. So my father and I sat in the branch manager's office when he brought in the corrected statements. After examining it carefully my father said, "Now I would like to close my account."
Did you notice her coworker freaking out with her best impersonation of the Wicked Witch of the West?
When my father was a baby all babies were dress-like gowns. When my grandmother needed to go outside for something she would lift a leg of the bad, place the hem of the baby's gown under it, put some molasses on his fingertips, and hand him a small feather. The baby would spend many minutes trying to get rid of that feather.
His mustache looks like two capybaras kissing...
*He's an easy man to hate.
Stocking a grocery store taught me to always try to kick a dropped item sideways to avoid breakage. I saved many a glass jar that way. Unfortunately, the habit kicked in when I dropped a box cutter but luckily the blade that penetrated my sneakers ended up between my toes, and no damage was incurred.
I bet the death rate of those pilots is horrendous.
Plausible Scenario: She found an air conditioner unit on the side of the road. She wanted to take it home to see if it worked but it was too heavy to carry.
Why do elementary schools just occasionally bring in a guy with a big snake? Who is the man? What are his credentials?
Street food is the best food.
How very wonderful.
Our state had a spate of converter thefts so they passed a law that any purchase or sale had to be accompanied by all the appropriate paperwork. Smart that.
Pink Floyd Concert, Venice, Italy 1989
An ancient Maya statue deep within the jungles of Honduras (1885)
Explorers in the 19th century, such as Frederick Catherwood, Alfred Maudslay, were the first ones to have a graphic record of the old Mayan cities through drawings and black and white photos.
*How could he resist sitting on it?
I talked to a puppeteer from England who was turning a castle's gatehouse into a theater. I asked if there were heritage restrictions and he said, "No, of course not. It's only 300 years old."
Anyone who drinks coffee in the morning is psychotic. They know the reality of what is in store for them and still insists on being wide awake for their daily nightmare.
This guy mounted strings of lights under the lip of the treads...
I implore you all to do whatever you have to do to curtail your cat's murderous tendencies.
This is an Echidna.
This is Echidna's penis.
I've taught my students' pop-up card making for decades but never thought of that.
That makes my dick tingle.
I honestly think the automatic ice maker in the door is the greatest invention of all time.
Little fuckers employ teamwork...
I've never met an amber story I didn't like.
I was asked to paint a mural inside a restaurant called "The Side Porch". I designed this and used my parents as models.
It technically wasn't a mural but a painting on canvas but I'm a muralist so it's a mural.
Soon after it was installed my parents visited the restaurant and several people recognized them from the painting - which, of course, thrilled them.
Thirty years later and it's still there.
BTW: The white streaks are reflections of the clear two-part epoxy coating used to facilitate cleaning.