About Me

My photo
I'm an artist, educator, militant anti-theist , and I write. I gamble on just about anything. And I like beer...but I love my wife. This blog contains observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while.

Wednesday, July 21, 2021


One Of My Very Own


EMAIL: ralh.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com




I once got a role in a porno. 

I was the spouse at work.




*viewer contribution


                      *viewer contribution


How to know your child watches too many serial killer movies...


*And that one prick said I wasn't near clever enough...HA!


*I am assuming that is a joke.


This guy's toast was burned even though he had bought his mother a toaster and he needed an explanation...


Well, that was unexpected...


I haven't a clue.


That's actually not a bad idea.


The mishap transcends ethnicity.

Remember this?

Well, it is far from rare.



Watch very carefully.

Would someone like to try explaining that to me?

Maybe a haunted house? That would explain the camera.



Willy Wonka was the original Hunger Games.



At least it was a quick death.


Do you remember me asking you to invent a country from scratch? Well, let's revisit that.

Would your invented country operate like that?

Let me put it to you real simple:

What say you?


I say that if your wages are so low that your workers qualify for food stamps then the cost of those food stamps ought to be taken out of corporate profits.


I'm thinking various dots on the top or bottom or both could multiply each number by a factor of ten.


This from a nurse: "It gets worse than that. The same unvaccinated people scream at us for not giving them the same treatments Trump got until they die."

Only an idiot would refuse life-saving treatment. There are 75 million idiots in this country, officially as of 2021.

Well, those dead unvaccinated people got covid from someone just as stupid as they. At this point it's not suicide - it's also murder.



This is a craftsman in every sense of the word...


You do remember this...well...cunt...


A beehive replaces the statue's head...

[verification needed]



Artesania en madera



Where do you think this would be necessary?

This keyed switch is being installed in a new school so kids can't turn lights on and off.


Different channels showing different advertisements.

[verification needed]


Does anybody know why cops touch cars when they approach?

There were two theories in the comments: to get rid of static electricity and to put fingerprints on the vehicle to identify it if things go south.

That is the perfect segue to the next section.



Arugula is a superfood because it's delicious, good for your bones, and reminds me of an old-fashioned car horn.



If I'm not mistaken this is illegal and for just cause.


Never in the history of bumper stickers has anyone anywhere read one and changed their minds. But that doesn't seem to matter.

^^C 2-3^^


Is there an OSHA for livestock?


When The Traffic Jam Is Actually A Parked Car

That happens much more often than I would have thought possible. Who do you blame?


Russian man sneaking out police van.

If I had written that scene in one of my novels I would have had him crawl up under the van then when the cops went to look for him he would have gotten in the van and driven away.


Your license should be immediately suspended if you get run over by your own car.


"God, give me a sign..."

It could have been worse.














I painted my first large-scale mural in 1976. It was partially paid for by an NEA grant that was voted on by Gregory Peck.

It depicts old people and young people, men and women, and black people and white people all walking forward together.

Each of those people lived in that town. I photographed them as they walked across the street on the way to the post office. When the white man on the extreme right saw that I placed him next to a black woman he threatened to sue me. I went back at night and added several inches of fat to his belly.

I made a small mock-up of each person and later framed them. 

I still have one in my home.

But wait, there's more...

Directly around the corner of the building, I painted the entire city block. Moving from left to right it depicts the youngest citizen (photographed in the delivery room days before) through the life stages to end up with the oldest citizen photographed in a retirement home.

Before beginning, I went to a trusted paint store and asked them for any and all advice they could give me. After me describing what I had to do they suggested I buy the best cut brushes money could buy. A cut brush is used to get a crisp edge to the shapes painted. After 45 years I still have a dozen or so of those brushes.

What makes them so good is their "exploded tip" that has each fiber split into three or four strands right at the end - like split ends in women's hair.

They also strongly urged me to buy two 2-gallon plastic buckets. I have used them for 45 years also.

But the best tip they gave me concerned these hooks to attach a bucket to the ladder. You simply can't paint murals without these hooks.

After 30 years the town called me back to refurbish that first mural. This time I stipulated that I be provided with a motorized lift and with it, my crew and I finished in a weekend what originally took months.



Anonymous said...

Puzzle time: I'm going to guess it's 4:00 p.m.
60 - 8 = 52. 52 / 4 = 13
13 hours past midnight equal 1:00 pm. 1 + 3 = 4

ponder said...

Different channels showing different advertisements.
[verification needed]


Robin said...

C2 - Can't help but notice that the guy with the Fluoride bumper sticker is smoking a cigarette - wonder if he knows about the poisons in those things?

Anonymous said...

B3: dots would only complicate this system. It's the most simplified symbol system I've ever seen. There are only nine root symbols. Then each symbol is easily increased by a factor of 10 by simply moving the tag to the upper left, lower right or lower left, in that order, for a tens, 100s, 1000s magnitude.

Interesting though, although not needed to represent any number greater than zero, I saw no symbol to represent zero. I suppose there's no real need to represent something that doesn't exist.

Anonymous said...

C5: did you notice the pile of shit on the bumper?

Anonymous said...

B13: new light switch for school phase two - remove and ban all paper clips from every school, as educators realize their students are smart enough to bend wire.

D'Ascoyne said...


Gee. I always thought it was the "top" that is supposed to do the flogging.

Anonymous said...

B9: True, apparently. At the de Young Museum in San Franscisco


Dr. WeTodd said...

C2-Although fluoride is used industrially in a fluorine compound, the manufacture of ceramics, pesticides, aerosol propellants, refrigerants, glassware, and Teflon cookware, it is a generally unwanted byproduct of aluminium, fertilizer, and iron ore manufacture.Oct 22, 2013
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov › pmc

Ralph Henry said...

C2, Dear Dr., I was told that fluoride occurred naturally in well water and was the reason country children had fewer cavities than city dwellers.

D'Ascoyne said...

I'm told that was an "old school" trick that was more prevalent 50 years ago. Most cops don't do that today but, as y I u can see, some still do. It's mainly for two reasons - yes, to put fingerprints on the trunk but also to make sure the trunk is closed.

Random Post

Random Posts Widget

Blog Archive