FOLIO OLIO: MONDAY #1788

My Gamecocks got beaten by a lesser team. If it were possible to suit up eleven pieces of dog shit, they would have played better than my Cocks.

A Taliban ban on vaccination is exacerbating a serious polio outbreak in Pakistan, threatening to derail dramatic progress made this year towards wiping out the disease worldwide, health officials say.

( can you spell collective insanity, boys and girls? )

Two contradicting quotes from the same article concerning Banksy's work...

"Graffiti does ruin people's property," Bloomberg said in a press conference Wednesday.

"Somebody offered me a million dollars if I took down the bricks," said Jose Goya, the manager of a Williamsburg, Brooklyn, building that Banksy spray-painted Wednesday night.

Let's fucking hope so, people...

I've often wondered how the government can build such things as these and not be sued to death over the certain injuries....

My good young buddy broke his collar bone doing that and still had to ride his bike back to the car like a thousand miles away.

This looks like Russia to me...

I personally think he didn't realize the window was up.

I wonder how many people had to fall off these things before the new handrails went up...

Always love a woman for her personality. They have like 10, so just take your pick.

Criminal charges considered for stupid assholes who destroyed 170-million-year-old Utah rock formation.
Did you hear about these pricks. They toppled those balanced rocks left over from the Ice Age.

I bet this could make taking blood a lot easier...

And another interesting recent headline:

"Francisco Rafael Arellano Felix, the eldest brother in Mexico's once-dominant Tijuana drug cartel, was shot to death by gunmen disguised as clowns at a children's party on Friday."

That reminds me of when I first started blogging and posted all those Danish cartoons that caused Muslims to kill a bunch of innocent people. My daughter was concerned that one of them my target me, and I said, "That would be great! Think of the story you would tell my grandchildren when they ask how their grandpa died."
And think of the great show and tell they could present with the crime scene photos of my beheading.

The beginning reminds me of a black hole...

I could play with that thing all day.

I always put the apostrophe in "ain't" to make sure I'm using proper improper grammar.
And remember, whenever you correct someone's grammar, nobody like you.

"Lucy in the sky with diamonds." - John Lennon, the world's worst Clue player.
(think about it)

Urban explorers...you got to love these guys...

"The waiter at Olive Garden has been grating my cheese for so long waiting for me to say when that customers are screaming and three people have died. I will not yield."

I am older than the internet.

That is true. Hundreds of people predict hundreds of different things, then when one on them lucks into it, he's remembered forever. Case in point are the prophets of the bible. Back then you couldn't throw a dead cat without hitting a prophet, but by picking and choosing they look like the real deal.

The judge died in this ensuing 1970 "Marin County Courthouse Incident"...

I bet the judge's widow thought it more than an incident.

What happens when its RPM governor fails during a storm...

It is very, very rare.

I'm not superstitious. It's bad luck to be superstitious.

Most black conservatives I know believe in two things that unite conservatives: personal responsibility for one's life, and a realization that government is not always the answer to your problems.

This is what Europeans think when they think of Americans...

And I would say they just about nailed it.

Last night I drank the exact right amount of beer......then I drank a whole lot more.

In a perfect world, bad movies would have bad trailers.

Children play in graveyard...

Adults play in graveyard...

The only Miley Cyrus quote you will ever read here:
"I don't just twerk and lick stuff. I sing a little, too."

There are people who refuse to believe this...

These are the same type of people who refused to believe that the earth was not the center of the universe until the evidence was overwhelming....then they gave god all the credit for "designing" it that way.

Yes, it's advertising a yard sale.

Kennedy's brains...

HERE'S A BIG SHOUT-OUT TO ALL THE PEOPLE WHO DON'T HEAR WELL.

There are people, contrary to evidence otherwise, who believe they can trust their government...

Think giving syphilis to blacks, the red menace of McCarthy and Nixon.

Did you notice that they blurred his face?

Lots of Christians wear crosses. Do they think that when Jesus comes back the first thing he wants to see is a thousand fucking cross?

I have the patience for like 7 shades of gray...tops.

What do these people have in common?

John Lennon, Dan Aykryod, Mick Jagger, Elvis Presley, Sigourney Weaver, Walter Cronkite, J. Edgar Hoover, General Douglas MacArthur, Stephen Hawking, Mikhail Gorbachev, Ronald Reagan, Jimmy Carter and Richard Nixon.

They all believe UFO’s have visited planet earth and many have witnessed said visitation.

World Cup qualifying games are going on right now. Mexico's national team, commonly referred to as "El Tri," has had a less-than-stellar qualifying performance. Seeing as how soccer is only second to God in terms of popularity in Mexico, this has many Mexican soccer fans... well... kinda pissed off. On Tuesday night, Mexico faced elimination from World Cup qualification unless they got either a win or a draw against Costa Rica.   They lost.   World Cup dreams over, right? Actually, no. As it turned out, Mexico had one last hope of going to the World Cup playoffs if the USMNT (United States Men’s National Team) could win or draw against Panama, whom El Tri had previously lost to.   Going into the final minute of regulation, the United States was losing 2-1 against Panama. Meanwhile, Mexico despaired. It looks as if their World Cup dreams were truly gone...  However, at the last possible moment, a miracle happened. Graham Zusi, midfielder for the United States, banged in an equalizer to tie the game up at 2-2. The voice in the above video is TV Azteca announcer Christian Martinoli's reaction to Zusi's improbable goal. To add insult to injury, the United States scored another goal less than a minute later to make it 3-2.   Overnight, Zusi has become a sensation in Mexico. Hailed as a savior of Mexico's World Cup hopes.

How could you possibly resist make a learning moment out of this...

I mean, the motherfucker is going to land on its feet anyway.

Mixed feelings about this. Zoos are a great way to teach children about loving animals, but the first thing that love should do is to keep them free where they belong...

An accidentally published, un-redacted document from a lawsuit against the TSA reveals that the Taking Shoes Away people believe that "terrorist threat groups present in the Homeland are not known to be actively plotting against civil aviation targets or airports." That is to say, there is no identifiable risk to America's skies -- and all of business with shoes and pornoscanners and horrible, abusive incidents involving toddlers, people with mental disabilities, cancer survivors, rape survivors, and the whole business of treating travelers like presumptive terrorists is all to prevent a problem that, to all intents and purposes, doesn't exist.