THURSDAY #1798

My wife has entered a fund raiser and will shave her head if there are $2000 in donations. It just started and she's already got $600.

Last Halloween posts...I promise...

It looks like he as two magnets on the front of his pants to hold the tail.

 "Pup Fiction"

Yeah, they have Halloween in war zones...

Does anybody know which Obamacare death panel killed Lou Reed?

Son-in-law went to Kenya. Bedbugs causing them to put everything in freezer...even his computer.

Crossword: Babe's hangout.
_ _ _
[ STY ]

 On more than one occasion, I've needed to get onto a construction site to look at a wall for a mural. My partner and I would don matching hard hats and carry clips boards. You can get onto ANY construction site with a hard hat and a clip board.
By the way, today I'm going to meet with a man to sell a mural. He owns a bar and I will take half my pay in barter for his....wares. Wish me luck.

I walk around in awe of this every second of every day...

Giving family members of 9/11 victims a say in designing the replacement building makes about as much sense as giving family members of slain soldiers a say in designing an aircraft carrier.

There’s a very thin line between confidence and cockiness.

Laughed when I saw this...

 Somewhere in my bio for this blog it asked for my hobby or some such shit and I put 'Breather".

I simply don't get this....anybody?

 He iced it??

I loathe fake reality shows....and they all are...

It's like they are connected in some weird Human Centipede sort of way...

This is cultural insanity...

Every time I wait on the cable guy I hope when he arrives he doesn't try to have anal sex with me like I saw happen in that web documentary.

?????

Arturo Vidal wanted a penalty for this fake ass shit....

My wife could win American Idol if she were allowed to take her shower on stage.

This is me when my wife comes home early and interrupts me doing something so vulgar, so vile, so depraved as to embarrass a New Orleans pimp...

Never lie. She always catches you anyway.

 Well, it looks like somebody has used up two of their three wishes.

If the temperature is less than my age I don’t get out of bed.

 I had my dog tags made and on the religion line I had them put "Hedonism".

This is how a parachute rip cord works...

Kid with LED costume...

Solar power melts steel like butter....

My wife asked me to see things from her point of view.
I looked out the kitchen window.

A very lucky guy...

 My buddy, Rupert, was twirling his keyring in the elevator and dropped his keys all the way into the basement. He had to get the building supervisor to help him get them.

Guy texted his boss that he would be late to work because he had a flat tire...sent this pic...

Guilt. How could we do this to children and not call it abuse?

India. What can I say?

Got any idea what these people are holding?

 Their own hearts.

What do you call the phobia of chainsaws?
Common sense.
(For Mel)

True.

I was always under the impression was that humans were the only animals to have sex face to face...

...I bet some twisted zoo attendant taught him that.

"I know they are filthy, Hillary, but I brought a box of wet wipes. Now climb your ass up there we're losing the light."

"Good. Now look comfortable."

I read about this woman in Indiana who married the man she donated a kidney to....or as he's also called, a man who will NEVER win an argument. "I kinda like the blue one..." "Well, I kinda liked my kidney, too...."


Oh, my....

This is learning how to walk again from 1909 and for some reason I found it funny...

I am not proud that I jacked off to this...

...but she seems to enjoy that way too much.

This is a Wendy's promotion. Saddest thing I've ever seen...

...and to think she has to do that for minimum wage.

Speaking of staying in school...
When there are 30 seconds left to get to class on time, a high school plays Jeopardy music. No yelling. No hassle...and it puts a smile on everyone's face.
Which, of course, reminds me of a story.
When I was in the military we used to practice for conventional and gas attacks on the base. The warning for a conventional attack was the Lone Ranger theme song played on huge outdoor speakers. For a gas attack they played Louie Armstrong singing Hello Dolly.
And that shit is true.

This is what passes as logic in some circles...

 Does anyone else but me find it ridiculous that the creator of the universe could order us to fix a body he designed?

 But seriously, people were cutting off their babies' dicks BEFORE Abraham and the invention of the god who commanded it.

Well, he works in mysterious ways.
The ultimate fall back position for a closed mind.