FRIDAY #1875

I didn't know this...

 But why?

The 1950's was such a great time to grow up...unless you were a black person.
But you know, we are still using that model to educate our children...the one the 50's people followed from the 1850's people.
You take children of the same age, put them in a classroom and expect them to progress at equal speeds in each subject. 
Sad that.

MESSAGES ON WALLS

You don't know who's naked until the tide goes out.

Wife found an old newspaper photo of me painting a mural...

Contrary to what you may have heard from the sociologists, the human mortality rate is still 100 percent.

Seduction is giving permission to someone to do what they secretly already want to do.

Am I the only one who has fallen asleep on the toilet?

OOMVO...

HUSBAND TIP #546:
If your wife asks you if she is getting fat, just say, "You're still my dreamboat even if you displace more water than you used to."
You're welcome.

Think you are a real man because you skydive or climb mountains? Well, when my last wipe comes back clean, I blow my nose with it.


SYDSE...

Everyone you know has a personality disorder

And these are the good guys...

They feel threatened.....????....

Democracy would work a whole lot better if we weren’t so, you know, human.

This looks as fake as it can get...

 ...but it's a man cleaning a photo back drop.

Is this true....

I am sooooo ready for the World Cup...

Still a virgin...only seven little dents...

Sometimes governments give indigenous people sovereignty rights, but it’s usually by accident.

Mag-fucking-nificent....

You think in an alternative universe a dog husband asks his wife to wear a pants leg costume?
(that's a visual joke...I like visual jokes very much)

Anne Frank and Martin Luther King were both born in 1929. Hardly anyone knows that.

Dear Joey,

Don't do this...

You want religion in schools?

All religions or just yours?

Uncle Ralph says...

Ben and Jerry's sells these stamps. I want them.

 By the way, it's legal to do that.

Had to capture this from a movie I watched last night...for Abby, my favorite server...

Whenever you get sad, imagine Dennis Rodman doing long division.

Philippines is spelled with a ph.
Filipino is spelled with an f.
There is no god.

Deep down aren't we all just a little proud of ourselves when our poop clogs a toilet?

An assemblage...

I like them very much.

People who live on a tropical atoll give directions as if they live on a tropical atoll.

College students like to binge drink, unless they are busy.

 Did you notice that he was blown halfway across the street?

People are willing to pay other people to vibrate little flaps of tissue in my throat because it sounds nice.