FOLIO OLIO: WEDNESDAY #1891

Wife's being a real trooper through this latest ordeal.

The thing that amazes me most is that I hadn't had any alcohol in four days. Bad shit seems to happen to me when I'm sober.

Things progressing nicely...getting more and more mobile, but will never be able to walk without a walker or a cane. I know I can work my way off this walker, but I'm not much of a cane guy...I thinking walking stick instead. Check this out...

I might even carve my own.

My nephew emailed me that a guy in his office wanted to send me a comment to say: “If he had a cat instead of a dog he probably wouldn’t have tripped”.

Well, I wanted very much to respond to that and requested that it be posted, but then he tamed it all up and made it all nice-nice: "You know, if you had a cat there this accident may have been avoidable. With a cat you would have either stepped down or kicked it out of the way instead of potentially shifting your weight in an attempt to avoid hurting the dog."

This guy, knowing I don't like cats, made a u-turn and ended up on my nice list. He is a smart man.

Thinking of kicking the cat out of the way, let's look at the accident this way...if you are walking down the sidewalk and the toe of your shoe catches on a root, then by reflex you lift that shoe higher, then speed up the forward progress of the shoe and continue walking with only a little hiccup in your journey. Now let's suppose that the root is a big black dog. When your shoe makes contact with the dog, it has the exact same reflexes, but this "root" rises up and tries to run off - leaving you with nary a non-moving surface to plant your foot....hopelessly at gravity's cold mercy with the colder concrete slab rushing up to leave you a permanent reminder of your folly.

Now back to the reason I wanted the comment posted.

I thought the guy was a cat person and was taking a cut at an non-cat guy...me....the old cats are better because angle. I has forming thoughts about my reply centered around taking advantage of a newly traumatized person just to make your stupid little point. I was going to suggest where he could go and what he could say and do to further such cruelness:

-The VA Hospital and remind all those guys that it probably wouldn't have happened if they had joined the Navy.

-Hang around the chain-link fence at juvenile detention and remind each kid they wouldn't be there is they had studied harder in school.

-The Vet's kill room and remind all pet owners whose pet is about to be put down that it probably wouldn't happen if all animals were spayed or neutered.

-Walk through the childhood Leukemia ward at your local hospital and tell the kids that it probably wouldn't have happened if they had prayed more.

-A Neo-Nazi rally to ask them why? They are still so stupid as to invade Russia in the winter.

WARNING: A few times I have made jokes on this blog that people took way, way to personally. That last one has all the earmarkings. I assure you my heart is in the right place.

The closest I've come to porn lately was watching my wife push a plug into a particularly stubborn wall outlet.

One of the saddest things I can imagine are those African kids watching Gatorade get dumped on a winning coach.

This guy does this evil shit as like a hobby!!!

I've always been skeptical of the concept "Too Big to Fail". Have you seen my wife's family? And they fail constantly.

OOMVO...

Masturbation is a form of cardiovascular exercise.

Rare view of Hoover damn from the lake side...

There's something very satisfying about buying office supplies...but I'm not quite sure how to explain that feeling.......the illusion of productivity?

My proctologist seemed a bit uneasy when I slid my finger in along side his.

Thanks, Carl...not bad yourself.

So many things to see here...

Her wearing prison stripes in an old prison,

Her looking quite hot,

Boy noticing his mom's ass for the first time,

Hole in wall???

That's what he said...

Can you imagine how many times a goldfish in a bowl experiences Deja vu?

Does Canada even have a president or is it just whichever moose has the strongest antlers?

By owning a Chinese Restaurant, everyday is Bring Your Child To Work Day.

I hope this kid looks good in prison orange, cause he seems to have a larceny bent....

Those are Tic-Tacs with which he is trying to fool the Tooth Fairy.

Words are just that...words. Okay, you do all that stuff and miracles happen...show me one. Show me something that happened to you that transcended chance and was a true miracle.

Bill Nye's Debate Of Creationist Ken Ham Has Some Scientists Bothered

People who hold marginal positions love debates because it makes their position seem credible -- after all we wouldn't be debating this question if it wasn't a real question would we? We wouldn't "defend" evolution unless it needed defending would we?

(Well, I disagree. Debate is what we need more of. Had Dr. Nye refused the debate, Ham could also that Nye knew evolution couldn't be defended. btw...I plan on posting the entire event)

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