WEDNESDAY #2019

FIRST, THE GOOD NEWS...

SOCCER

 Boy, that hit close to home.

I can only assume that this old fart invented that.

Where's Waldo nightmare...

I thought this was a foul...

 Remember this red card?

 Now it has come down to this...

 Arguably the dumbest thing ever done on a World Cup soccer pitch since the aforementioned idiocy.

I did win a chunk of change on NASCAR...more than enough to pay my Ghana loses. And, yes, I bet against the USA...but cheered just as loud as anyone else when they scored.

What if the World Cup was played with a 6-foot helium filled ball?

GAME OF THRONES...

LASTLY, THE BAD NEWS...

Huge twins are very rare. There was one in, I think, Nebraska lately. As I understand it, the experts can't even figure out the physics that could make this even possible.

LATE ENTRIES:
With the World Cup schedule being what it is, I spend just about all day in a bar. This afternoon I faced this challenge - Russia was an overwhelming favorite to win over South Korea. I took the bet to all comers with this caveat - a tie and I win also. The game ended in a tie and a cleaned up.
I love gambling. My phrase of choice for the two hours was, "Fuck Putin." By the way, the bar was packed, but when Russia scored late, my opponents were the ONLY ones to cheer....it was surreal.
On a side note, one guy bet big that Brazil would not tie...not with me, but with another patron. It was money the young man did not have, but he was confident because Brazil had never tied in a World Cup in the last five thousand years....or so. He lost. The lesson is my old friend The Due Factor. I have deduced that anytime a bet relies on words like NEVER, then they are due to break the streak. It doesn't always work, of course, but when it does, it is sweet....real sweet.

It was an honor to watch this young man work.

I have also entered a very strange pool I invented myself. The TV sets in my bar are state of the art. The resolution is so good that I laid money on which close-ups of the crowd would reveal the most facial moles on the female fans. I picked Colombia and am way ahead of the field. For what reason I can't discern...maybe it's something in the water, but those women are eat up with them...even the pretty ones...of which there are few.

People got married in a hot air balloon even back then...

Your momma is so ugly it damages her self-esteem.

I find this very depressing...

 So much time spent just getting to work. Why not just live closer to your job?

An old bullfighting poster...check out his face...

I will never tire of watching this payback....NEVER...

My right leg fell asleep and my left leg drew dicks all over it with a Sharpie.

Her face speaks volumes...

I'm planning on purchasing a Med-Alert bracelet that says "allergic to gluten free".......just in case.

 And Tesla won.

Were the tables turned...

Oh, look, they DID turn the tables...

One Of My Very Own...

The fact that there are gay people born in Alabama is all the proof you will ever need that homosexuality is not a choice.

Yoga and Yoghurt are actually not the same thing.

When the wife says, "We need to talk."

My wife’s bra is more of a cross-your-waist.

OOMVO...

That was not funny....sorry.

I posit that humans are born rule breakers...

 Check out their eyes...

...if you know what I mean.

What a wonderful idea...

 A mirror to show them what they look like.

And, if you ask me, it seems to work...

What kind of  army advertising is this decal?

 "Join the army and get your leg blown off?"

Doing this at the wrong time and place can get you thrown in jail...

 It is so arbitrary.

This is a great idea...

 A cap with Velcro so you can change the logo without having to buy a new cap.

How.....convenient.

This guy put it rather well...

Every religion is debunked....sooner or later. There are no gods living on Mount Olympus. The god does not live in the volcano demanding virgins. God does not ride across the sky on the sun. Etc, etc, etc, etc. They all were created to answer questions and explanations were invented that made absolute sense to the people of the time. Yet knowing that thousands of beliefs have come and gone, people still cling to the latest superstitious fad. 
Mind boggling.

What is the difference between being naïve and having faith?

As we change the diaper, the diaper also changes us.

I so want to believe...

Make awkward sexual advances, not war.

And a good time was had by all...

Got this from a woman who seemed to know - Evening is between 5:00p.m. and 8:00p.m.  Night is after 8:00p.m.

The son of a bitch really gets around...

This was the lead for an article explaining how the moon landing could not possibly have been faked...

 Can you believe we STILL feel compelled to discuss this?

The orange ball does not actually change size...

My vocabulary far exceeds my spelling abilities.