TUESDAY #2276

One Of My Very Own...

BOISE -- An Idaho lawmaker received a brief lesson on female anatomy after asking if a woman can swallow a small camera for doctors to conduct a remote gynecological exam. The question Monday from Republican Rep. Vito Barbieri came as the House State Affairs Committee heard nearly three hours of testimony on a bill that would ban doctors from prescribing abortion-inducing medication through telemedicine. He later claimed he "wasn't being serious" when he posed the question.  It's worth noting that he "sits on the board of a crisis pregnancy center in northern Idaho."

Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Climate Change Debate: 4 min
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cjuGCJJUGsg

I swear to god, if I ever decide to rob a bank, I'm going to get a getaway car the exact color of this fucking dress...

If you have no idea what I'm talking about, congradulations, you have an actual life that doesn't involve flowing electrons.

Guy had his bike stolen...

I don't know who was the most stupid. Look carefully.

Did you notice he left the combination on the back of the lock?

The Red-throated Caracara regularly kicks the shit out of wasp nests... check out the wasps scrambling to intercept!

My guess is that the wasps damaged the chicks. No word on the structure built over and under the wasp nest.

Today at the bar my Siri spoke up and says “Excuse me, Major Hugecock, my internet is not working.”

On March 12, you can bid on a vial of Winston Churchill's blood. Then all you'll need, ahem, is some toil, tears, and sweat! In 1962, a nurse at Middlesex Hospital in London, where Churchill was a patient, snagged it as a souvenir. The market value of the vial is a very difficult thing to estimate. Churchill’s cigar butts have been known to change hands for $773, but the blood sample is the closest you can get to Churchill. There is nothing to guide it, because nothing like it has ever come up to auction. Some say it's the most poignant and unique memorabilia ever auctioned.

Guess what?

 I apologize for that...but I find myself practicing for being a granddad.

I looked all over to find out what these are, but to no avail.

 Can anyone help me out with it?

I'm not sure what is going one here. I don't recall Elvis speaking about integration one way or the other...

An old guy at the gym told me I looked like his late wife. I'm hoping he meant while she was alive.

When you are finished with a corncob pipe, you can just feed it to a pig. The Lord is amazing.

What an unusual 3 minute clip of a Chinese subway station...
http://thisisnthappiness.com/post/112554568394/xidan-station-beijing

As one would expect, jokes about blood thirsty psychopaths are irresistible...

But there is one aspect of this that I feel uniquely qualified to address...

Nobody seems to know what to call them.

Well, at first they called themselves "Daesh", but now they will kill you for calling them that. You see, Daesh sounds a lot like Daess(?), which means something nasty, so the old name was dropped.

I say we should call these fuckers Daesh until the last one dies hiding in his cave.

This ended all different than I thought...

That looks like that helmet I posted several days ago...the one that would stop a bullet...

 Anyway, I bet he's glad he had it on.

Don't blame rats for the Black Death. Scientists now think it was Asian giant gerbils that carried the fleas that spread the plague.

What do you think made these tracks?

Seriously.

This is Rüdiger Weida, 63, aka Bruder Spaghettus, founder of a Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster congregation in the town of Templin, Germany. Public Radio International profiled Spaghettus and his push for legal recognition of the church. Ramen!

Homan Square is the Chicago Police Department's "secure site" where people as young as 15 are detained without charge and without access to counsel, subject to beatings that result in head wounds, and, in one case, death. People detained in Homan Square are not listed in any database and can't be located by lawyers or family members. 

At least one notorious Gitmo torturer, Richard Zuley, formerly worked at Homan Square for the Chicago PD. The guards who stand at the doors to Homan Square refuse to identify themselves. Although most of those detained and abused at Homan Square are poor people, mostly of color, it has also been used for political detention of protesters. 

You might want to do some research on that, especially you people who think if you do nothing wrong, you have nothing to fear from your government.

Beer...

 Not only is it #1, but it sells over twice as much as #2.

 Makes it sound like one caused the other.

Question:

 I get making the gun...but why TWO cartridge sizes?

More of these holes are showing up in Siberia...

This fascinates me.

To my wonderment, the things are so round. How in the world do they all end up round?

How many balloons do you think a 357 handgun will penetrate?

 4.

Now that pot is legal in Washington DC, there’s no limit to what won’t get done.

These are the contact lenses they use to keep your eyes closed after you die…

I could have gone all day without knowing that.

I'm a real fan of the VW Beetle. This is probably a late '40s model. You can tell by the split rear window.

And from that time until they were taken off the market, each year the brake light got bigger and bigger. 

When you’re trying to put it back in but it bends at some weird angle.

Google said those Blogger sites that continue to host pornography after March 23 will be made "private." That means the content will be allowed to remain up, but it will only be accessible to the site's owner and the people who the user directly shared the blog with. Google noted that it isn't completely banning nudity from being shown publicly on Blogger. The site will allow nudity "if the content offers a substantial public benefit, for example in artistic, educational, documentary, or scientific contexts." But it also puts Google in the position of deciding what is art and what is pornography

So, would this be pornography?

That's honey, by the way. 

White privilege is never having to spell your last name.

Why don’t humans have a mating season?

I’m not unreasonable. I don’t want to live forever. I just want to live longer than everyone else.

Sculpture moves by wind only...

I’ve got a couple of very provocative bartenders who have a look that says “Why are you looking at my eyes when my boobs are down here?”

I bet that motherfucker isn't very popular on the USO circuit.

It's nice to know it's not just humans that look like fools from time to time...

I like myself best when I remember to be kind to the prisoners.

My Final Word...