FOLIO OLIO: SUNDAY #3549

One Of My Very Own

EMAIL: ralph.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com

Well, we here in South Carolina are going to survive yet another disaster.

I did lose my over/under death toll bet at 5 1/2. There are now 6, but one is a heart attack that I am protesting.

Then there's this bitch.

Why is he doing that? Standing in the middle of a fucking hurricane telling everyone else they must evacuate. Anyway, we know what high winds and rain looks like, Jim. Just shoot out the window and stay safe.

Then there this bitchiest move on TV.

This is why everyone should have trust issues with the media. If you can't trust the fucking weather channel you can't trust anyone.

People coming to pick up foster dogs for the weekend so coastal shelters can evacuate.

Well, damn. But, that's just what somebody who saw aliens would say.

FUN WITH LANGUAGE

So wrong on so many levels.

=1=

Taught a class of "damaged" children who were absolutely vicious. One sharpened a stolen pencil then got a running start and stabbed another student right between the shoulder blades. Freaked me the fuck out.

=2=

Well, of course, it does.

=3=

=4=

=5=

=6=

Crude but true.

=7=

=8=

=9=

It does? Then how could there be four or five "real" Jesuses in the insane asylum?

=10=

Asking a gay couple who the man and woman are in their relationship is like asking a vegetarian which vegetable in their salad is the meat.

"I'm sorry sir, but I'll need to refer you to the branch manager."

THE ANIMAL KINGDOM

=11=

Fucking pervert.

=12=

=13=

=14=

Interesting how it leaves a visible trail in the road.

=15=

On a related note...

I read that all tornados form horizontally as warm air rolls over cooler air. That seems to confirm that.

=16=

=17=

Pulling power of a Belgian draft horse against 18 men.

=18=

Speaking of...

That 90-degree turn seems to aid the lion.

=19=

Who knew.

=20=

Watch closely.

From such a lifetime of nightmares are born.

=21=

=22=

BOSS: I want that report on my desk by Friday.

[1 a.m. Thursday night]

ME (typing frantically): the surface is smooth, polished mahogany. Top left drawer sticks a bit. Corner is a little chipped.

MACHINES, DEVICES, AND GIZMOS

In Germany, they have no round doorknobs. Their lever style can be opened with any part of the body and it doesn't matter if your hands are oily. Round is just stupid unless it's a child barrier.

=23=

Nice for airports and such.

=24=

Let's take another look at this marvel.

I'm assuming it is a fishing rod.

=25=

Wait for it...

=26=

I've had one of these.

I found that it was much slower than just holding the nail with you fingers and being careful.

=27=

Now they have an auto-load hammer.

But look how he has that sissy grip on it. Jeez.

=28=

Neato.

=29=

This guy lifted his leaky-hose with balloons. He and another guy on the other side of the field just walk it along.

=30=

Can you even call yourself a family if you’re not making at least one person upset with what you’re serving for dinner?

PEOPLE NOT LIKE YOU AND ME

Holy fucking shit!

=31=

Being overweight should not be normalized in any society.

This post is not to judge anyone. But with all these "acceptance" movements cropping up, I have noticed a trend to normalize obesity (particularly in young children). Now if an adult wants to put on as much weight as humanly possible, more power to them (just means there will be more social security available for my daughter when she retires). But what I find pretty scary are the rising obesity rates in young people (which should be a crime against the parents if you ask me) and the bid to somewhat normalize it. It's unhealthy. . . and kills.

But then there's this: