FOLIO OLIO: WEDNESDAY #3968

One Of My Very Own

EMAIL:

ralh.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com

FUN WITH LANGUAGE

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*MNBT
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How many times do I use the wrong response gif?

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"You know what I can't stand?"

The importance of punctuation.

"You know what, I can't stand.
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Me at the grocery store on the phone with my pregnant wife: So, do we still have to buy milk or what the fucks going on with them titties of yours?

"HEY, Y'ALL, WATCH THIS!"

Amazing times two!

I wonder how many 1.5 backflips it took until he managed 2.
But don't his house look sturdy.
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In Jellyfish Culture This Is Considered A Dick Move

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So, let me get this straight - she has never had instructions or even watched another person shoot a rifle?
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Soon There Will A Dangerous Incident. What Causes it?

A. A falling limb
B. A dog
C. A purse snatcher
D. Gravity
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D. Gravity
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This is the way it is supposed to be done.

Here's how not to do it.

The instructions weren't clear.

But that is the perfect segue into the next section.
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My neighbor got busted for growing weed today. Turns out my property line isn't anywhere near where I thought it was.

KARMA FOR EVERY OCCASSION

She must have just remembered that time he fucked her sister.
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There is much talk about how large that man's penis is, but I believe that he has taken so many steroids, and steroids shrink manhoods.
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Sorry, kid, but your parent was too busy filming to protect you from all those large rocks littering your landing zone.
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I like to think his phone was packed with child porn.

But the look on his face.

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The old blender to the face trick works every time.
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Cheating on girlfriend prank reveals girlfriend is a ninja!

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This Congressman’s phone password is 111111.

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Speaking of...

I'm sure it was justified.
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Next level guardian angel...

Karma tells me that the cyclist is on the way to donate blood or volunteer at a soup kitchen or attended an anti-Trump rally.
Did you notice the camera flash? That will be Exhibit A,
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And lastly, sometimes you just accept karma...

And sometimes you make your own.
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No language should be mocked...other than French. But I must admit that when I found out that the French word for vegan cheese is "fauxmage" it delighted me.

ALL THINGS KAREN

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Why is there a coyote on the bus?

Probably because they can't fucking drive, Karen.
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Those are napkins.
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*gold* plated
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If I was a hamster and I met a female hamster I liked I would say, "Hey, girl, are you from Holland cause Hamster Damn!"

S.T.E.M. MATTERS

At first, I thought it said "stuck a plunger up its butt."
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Want to guess what this is?

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The inside of a Pine Cone
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This flashlight...

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No humans live on Mullion Island off the coast of Cornwall in Britain. No humans are even allowed to set foot on the remote island without a permit. Mullion Island is a protected sanctuary for seabirds - and yet conservationists kept finding thousands of rubber bands there.

Apparently, the gulls who brought them from the mainland thinking them worms.
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I'm thinking they shaped it like a pile of shit so the elephants would avoid stepping on it.
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This Simple Process Can Turn Water Into an Environmentally Friendly Disinfectant, Hydrogen Peroxide.