One Of My Very Own
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EMAIL: ralh.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com
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THE STRONGBOX
A couple of weeks ago I posted this image and said that it gave me an idea for a new box.
And I knew just how to duplicate it...
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Prior to that, I came across a discarded child's bed composed of dozens of oak slats similar to this.
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After a design idea solidified in my brain I knew that I couldn't use recycled wood for the box because of all its usual warpage. So I bought new wood to make the box.
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I used a 30-inch piano hinge in the back.
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I hardly ever use spray paint anything but I spray painted all the slats a medium brown.
All of the hardware going onto the box I spray painted gloss black.
I painted the box a wine red to ensure otherness from the slats.
Then very carefully I laid out the grid where the slats would be placed.
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Considering that each piece of the slats would have to be cut and predrilled individually I positioned my drill press, my chop saw, and my chair so that I had easy access to everything I needed.
Once all the slats were in place I super glued all of the fake rivets into place.
Next, I spent days filling in cracks and holes with wood filler and sanding smooth.
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Then I painted all of the rivet caps black.
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After attaching all of the hardware, the box was complete.
Each end has a heavy-duty lift handle.
The back has three gigantic strap hinges.
The front has a lift handle and two hasps complete with two massive locks.
All of those add-ons were handmade out of wood.
I placed the finish box on my screened-in porch so that I could look at it every time I went into and out of my house. Due to the interior of my house being so full of art, there's no room for it there.
I didn't like how it was backlit all the time so the next day I moved it to the other side.
But here's the clincher – the box does not open where it gives every indication it should. The lid is on the top.
More people should try trick-or-treating on Thanksgiving. Several people just assumed I was mentally ill and humored me. I came home with six cans of cranberry sauce.
I still remember that single mom at that birthday party who finished her Capri Sun and one suck.
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Indeed.
One reason I've never gotten into hard drugs is the fear of what they might contain other than the narcotics. I mean I wouldn't buy hot tamales out of somebody's trunk. I would never drink liquor that somebody made in his barn. I wouldn't even take the vitamins that somebody concocted in their own kitchen. Then why would I trust somebody who is making an illegal drug?
Dear Mr. Biden, I am waiting. We are all waiting.
*Viewer contribution
Fuck you dehumanizing bastards.
Our long-term mailman tells us that service has never been so bad at the post office and morale has never been so low.
I still find it extraordinary that in one generation the attitude concerning college education went from "To ensure the long-term success of our country as many people as possible should have a degree" to "Oh hell, AC repairmen make good money so you don't really need a degree anyway."
Orgasms or one of the healthiest forms of stress release. So when I tell you to go fuck yourself it's because I care.
Tip for telemarketing calls: "I plan on masturbating through this entire phone call, I hope that's alright with you."
ASSORTED BODY PARTS
Of course, it does, Sweetie.
I haven't a clue what he is doing or why he is doing it.
I'm keeping myself sharp by regularly asking myself tough questions like "What happened yesterday" and "What was I planning on doing just now?"
Why is it called "coming out of the closet"? It could be coming out of anything. What a waste of potential.
FOR AMUSEMENT ONLY
I'm gonna make something like that for my grandson and I had to do with the beach.
This is one of my favorite cartoons.
Cunt is the favorite word of my friend in London.
And I bet immediately afterward he asked for donations.
The internet had a lot to say about this debacle.
Sliced bread has had its time. Let's start saying the best thing since "skip intro".
Today at the supermarket I heard a woman tell her child "Stay right here and talk to the lobsters" and I must admit that it's not the worst advice I've ever heard.
WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT
That was the building that looked like a picnic basket.
I bet the first phone call he made was to his insurance agent.
I like it but I wonder why he painted the young man in black and white.
I mentioned months ago that small areas like those around those trees in my neighborhood were filled in by a company that guaranteed their product for life. It consisted of shredded car tires that look like mulch suspended and some sort of a rubbery plastic adhesive. They have been there for 10 years and look brand new. My question is why can't we come up with a new road surface that will last forever?
Close but no cigar. He should've moved a few degrees to one side to make the building look straight.
That reminds me of the art museum in Paris that moved all of their sewage, water, electricity, air conditioning, etc. to the outside of the building to make more room for the yard on the interior.
2000-year-old marble thrones at the ancient theatre of Amphiareion of Oropos, Greece.
Surprise motherfucker...
Man booby-trapped his truck with a flash-bang grenade and… it worked!
I think with a little effort they could've gotten the truck closer to the door.
That's a hagfish. They are scavengers that can absorb nutrients through their skin. It was sitting in a rotting fish just vibing.
They must sell for a fortune to warrant all that effort and time.
6 comments:
Your box seems to beg for Harry Houdini. I like the design, I'm not sure about the colors - but hey, it is your box. Good on you.
^^D5^^ The Romans seem to have done a pretty good job of building roads that last for fiucking ever. They used stone, and dirt.
Dear D5 Anon, Yeah, and it worked great at horse walking speed. But what about 70mph highway speed?
RH
Nice job on the box. Clever.
Raul
D4: He's black and white because he's plain and is trying to cover up the beauty of nature.
The nature is painted vibrant greens to match the true surroundings. He is the villain hiding it behind a wall.
B11 Harvest festival - Orthodox Jewish celebration.
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