One Of My Very Own
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EMAIL: ralh.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com
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LANGUAGE FOR ALL OCCASIONS
*MNBT
One of my novels involved a murderer brewing up a date rape drug to render his victims incapacitated. I found exactly how to brew it with one Google search.
We, humans, are so shortsighted.
I find it exceedingly cathartic.
I think that's called a weekend.
What do you mean by "we"? I did my part. I will be able to proudly relate to my grandchildren every single thing I did during the pandemic. How about you?
And now...
Well, I guess I'm safe.
Microwave: Would you like your food too hot or too cold?
Me: What if you cooked it just right?
Microwave: wHaT iF You COoKeD it JuST RiGht? Fucking Goldilocks.
A Gothic novel about a governess who works at the manor house of a mysterious man who spends a lot of time in his attic. She eventually discovers that he keeps his porn collection up there.
OBJECTS OF INTEREST
*MNBT
My smoking cessation is coming along nicely I'm proud to say.
Someone painted this picture and put it on the Internet for all to use for free. It was promptly stolen and put up for sale by more than one individual.
Something you don't see every day…
I've never understood the allure of soaring off in an unsteerable craft.
I'm starting to really like rocks.
Interesting use for old pallets...
I would like a rope tied to another tree that I could pull on to swing the bed.
We are on the cusp of considering the marijuana prohibition as insane as the alcohol prohibition.
That is an excellent idea for people living in the South where flying insects abound.
I like everything about it except the weight. I would prefer something as light as a bicycle that I could remove from the tracks with little effort.
Popup Book
“There’s no word that contains all the vowels in order”, I said facetiously.
*You heard it here first, folks.
Regaling my young bartender with tales of yore about the formality of landline phones and how, when the caller asked to speak to you by name, you’d have to say “This is he” or people would think you were raised by alley cats.
A HUMAN MENAGERIE
There is a special gel they use in movies that will burn without harming your skin. Maybe he used that gel and is just fucking with those people.
He's been waiting all year to release his rage...
And in every classroom, there's an asshole kid like that. And if the asshole kid moves away another kid will morph into an asshole to fill the void.
During Oktoberfest in Germany, every available space is converted into a bar. The place my friends and I hung out was a basement storage room. The owner crowed in several long tables all of which were offered some privacy by surrounding each table with lattice similar to this.
Well, when I started up the steep stairs I fell back just like the girl in the video. In so doing I pushed the lattice over onto the occupants of a table with me just sitting amongst them trying to apologize to all those people trapped in the lattice like a living Whack-A-Mole unable to move. We never went back...but it was not my choice to make.
I know what she's been doing. Do you know what she's been doing?
It was stated that neither one of those photographs had been retouched in any way.
*MNBT
When you forget your phone in your car in Alaska
She lives there BY CHOICE!
^^C8^^
The Helicopter Ride
Boy Meets Girl
Why’s it called casual sex? It’s not like people in relationships have sex in top hats…well not every time.
Actually nice guys get laid all the time. If you think women only date jerks you're probably just not as nice as you think.
PEOPLE WITH SPECIALIZED SKILLS
Sea Legs
He jumps extraordinarily high.
At one point his entire body was above the other guy's shoulders.
The Motorcycle Lift
Leg Day
An employee of the Month
The Stone Cutter
The Field Worker
Spill Removal
The Manueverer
The Pallet Guy
Slicin' and Dicin'
Mental illness?
3 comments:
Sweet justice, haha!
https://i.postimg.cc/YSCS4nXW/fuel.png
^^A12^^ I hope this guy has his life insurance paid up, and would caution him against going into any tall buildings. Anybody taking bets on when he shows up dead? This takes balls like nobody in the US Congress can even dream of having.
Puzzle: Triangle = 9
Circle = 5
Square = 2
Circle x Square - Triangle x Circle = Circle
5 x 2 -9 x 5 = 5
Raul
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