One Of My Very Own
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EMAIL: ralh.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com
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PEOPLE
Do you remember the Left Shark at the Super Bowl Halftime?
That is the first time I've seen it juxtaposed next to the right shark who knows the routine.
Even my most loyal followers are probably getting tired of me posting items concerning healthcare, climate change, Nazis, anti-science idiots, gay people, student debt, etc, etc. But the suffering of the common man really affects me and I feel I must voice my displeasure at their plight. And yes, I know I'm probably preaching to the choir on one hand and on the other hand have no chance of convincing the money lovers that there are other considerations in life. But this is the only voice I have and I feel that remaining quiet is the same thing as complicity.
Ladies and gentlemen, I present a divorced man...
I commend his gallantry but that looks rather dangerous to me.
Before you Trumpists send me a comment that these women are sent from the devil to steal our souls or some such shit, I want specific examples of mistakes they have made - otherwise, you are just whining.
The question begs - how do they retrieve it after they have gotten in the truck?
We've all wanted to do that haven't we?
One morning I went into my daughters' bedroom and found the youngest one (who slept in a crib) in bed with the older one (who slept in a bed). That night after we put them down for the night I spied through a crack in the door and watched my youngest daughter stand up in her crib with her hands grabbing the top of the railing, then she started to jump up and down, higher and higher, until she could leap up and out of the crib and crash to the oak floor. Then she crawled over and wrestled herself onto her sister's bed.
If you hate a person for what he wants to do with his dick then you need to talk to a therapist.
One of my favorite jokes:
Arab man: Honey! I've invented the zero!!
His wife: What, dear?
Arab man: Nothing. Nothing.
I have drank more before noon than most people have drank in total. But not anymore and I don't miss it at all.
My wife has picked out her obituary photo.
When I was about to post something...unflattering about my wife I used to ask for her permission. Then she told me I didn't have to because nobody believed me anyway.
I had forgotten the nap on the boat story.
If I were a tank
Tankers
Kelly's Heroes is a great movie!
That's what happens when you don't pay attention in science class.
Tradition is just peer pressure from dead people. I prefer to chart my own course.
Wait for it...
Trump will not, can not, and should not see the inside of a jail cell. I predict that when convicted his sentence will be that he not run for office again and probation for life. Any prison time will be commuted by whoever the president is at the time...Democrat or Republican.
There is no rule in any of the codexes that state you can't play with your Warhammer minis like Barbie Dolls. I rest my case.
*I haven't a clue as to what that means. I just like the way the words were put together.
Post-nut clarity is just cumming to your senses.
PLACES
Old world meets new world...
The dentist's office terrifies me.
That device would be pure torture to me.
I would be the one who wanted to have sex as soon as it got dark.
Those men are literally standing over the void.
Have you ever considered just how much effort humans spend on ways to get from one place to another?
That's what happens when you build it right.
As a lover of truly unique things, I would go completely insane living here.
Scientists Are Perplexed by Mysterious Holes They Keep Finding on The Ocean Floor
"While the holes look almost human-made, the little piles of sediment around them suggest they had been excavated. We attempted but were not able to take a peek into the holes and poke them with the tools on the remotely operated vehicle," the NOAA wrote in a press release.
Does anybody care to take a guess as to the cause? I'm going to go with gas venting from below the seabed.
Yeah, like we trust people enough to rely on that.
This toilet is rated at 1000 pounds.
All sex is casual sex if you are not wearing a fuxedo...with a bow tie.
"Rat bastard" is a really funny insult to me because not only are you a rat but you are a rat born out of rodent wedlock.
THINGS
That just doesn't look all that safe to me.
I wonder if that horse has any dragons.
Pink-skinned (not albino) water buffalo (carabao) in The Philippines.
I've only known two people who were involved in Bitcoin and I asked them both if they had ever cashed in some of it to buy something. They both rolled their eyes and told me that I just didn't understand. They are absolutely correct.
Bromine is "the element found in brominated flame retardants, which can build up in the body and potentially lead to memory loss, as well as skin and nerve problems
I look around for Holy Moleys and Hearts of Stone and this guy looks around for guns and gun parts.
Of course, he got his magnet fishing.
Take a good look at those sneakers you are wearing.
I told my Art for Beginners students at the university that everyone makes something that allows them to think like an artist while making. I challenged them to bring an example or written description. One young man took us out to the parking lot where he had his car. It wasn't as elaborate as the one above but his endeavor did take artistic thought.
Eye-popping fossil fish found in cattle field
The creature - a tuna-like predator called Pachycormus - is beautifully preserved in three dimensions.
With its big teeth and eyes, it gives the impression it is about to launch an attack.
Do all the new shapes and soles really make a difference in performance?
Can we assume it has a power assist?
Pencil Sharpener
The difference between Trump and Jim Jones is that Trump would charge you for the Kool-Aid.
My favorite part about the Spanish Harry Potter translation is that instead of calling Voldemort the "Dark Lord" they call him "Señor Tenebroso" which basically means Mr. spooky.
NAUGHTY BITS
I liked this movie.
I always ask for a hotel room with one of those when I'm traveling.
Okay, I thought it said "Gold" Digger until now and I refuse to relocate it.
Most people never watch porn of a couple using the same old missionary position that they use every time. What kind of a learning curve is that?
He put the suit on backward.
I want to see a doctored photo of Biden doing that.
Stay hydrated!
One of those streams coming from her crotch ought to be red.
HA!
Coastal First Aid
Seesaw: a playground toy that consists of a fulcrum-mounted plank designed to remind some children that they don't even have one friend.
Imagine spending 3000 years and hypersleep traveling to a distant star only to wake up at the destination and be greeted by a fully functioning human civilization because they invented a faster spaceship 50 years after you left.
VARIOUS BODY PARTS THAT DO NOT INCLUDE GENITALIA
Weird people make life interesting
I sure wish they had had those when I had all my broken bones.
Be wonderful to one another.
Can you spot the oddness?
5 comments:
Can we assume it has a power assist?
^^C14^^
Correctly engineered you would only need your pinky finger to move it.
B-9
Everybody knows those holes in the ocean floor are caused by space aliens.
No number
The correct phrase is "dirty rat bastard"
C5: Mt Dew no longer has BVO listed as an ingredient.
puzzle
Uhhhh, the bunny ears maybe? Worn by the child?
Dear Inchworm, I thought the bunny ears were drawn on to draw our attention to something else.
RH
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