About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

WEDNESDAY #2470


One Of My Very Own…



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The science on global warming is settled, so settled that 20 climate scientists are asking President Barack Obama to prosecute people who disagree with them on the science behind man-made global warming.

Scientists from several universities and research centers even asked Obama to use the Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organizations Act (RICO) to prosecute groups that “have knowingly deceived the American people about the risks of climate change, as a means to forestall America’s response to climate change.”

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A friend from Serbia asked me this question about the Syrian refugees.
What if a million Mexicans showed up at the border crossing in Pasadena and demanded to be allowed in?

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States use the reading level of 4th grade black boys to determine how many prison cells will be needed in the coming decade. If a black boy can’t read by then, there is a 75% chance that he will be incarcerated.



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That pixelated dot you see above may not seem like much, but it's a pretty big deal - it's your best look yet at an alien world. Scientists have used the Gemini Planet Imager to capture the movement of Beta Pictoris b, a gas giant traveling around a star 60 light years away.

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Floating Spoon Spotted On Mars
 How much more proof do you people need?

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That's fucking spooky.

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Botanist Bernabe Moya and his brother, environmental engineer Jose Moya, are tree experts who were studying an experimental forest in Andilla, Spain. In 2012, a fire swept through and destroyed the 50,000-acre plot; all but this one stand of Mediterranean cypress.

The Mediterranean cypress can be burned, but it is very difficult. They could be planted and act as fire breaks around the world.


Is anybody writing this shit down?

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In Beijing, China banned 2.5 million cars from driving for 2 weeks to get this beautiful blue sky for a World War II commemorative parade. As soon as the parade was over, the ban was lifted, and the blue vanished within 24 hours.

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Trust your guts no matter who hates them.


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NATURE PHOTOGRAPHY
No, no, and....no.

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I had a dream the other night where I was backstage and a guy shoved me out on stage saying, "The comedian didn't show up. You've got to go out there and make them laugh or we'll have to refund all the money."
So I walked out and said these first three things. The last one I made up after the fact.


My wife got fired at the match factory.

They are cutting back at the barber shop.

They are even laying off at the whore house.
That job I had at the information desk at the black college? I got axed.


(Axed. Is that too subtle?)

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Axed. Asked. Black college.

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This is the shower of my dreams.

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They can’t kill you unless you look away.


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Think about how many things have to go right in our bodies and only one has to go wrong.
At my age I think about shit like that a lot.

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 This one is not all that large, but it could easily be scaled up.
It was a great gif, but it wouldn't load.

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A perfect example of excellent situational awareness.

 A perfect example of zero situational awareness.

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At my age I go to the strip club for the lunch buffet.


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 Matisse


Another artist I really like - Louise Nevelson
Hers are wall-sized and either painted dark gray or white.

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Young guy shares his pics of the zoo with a gorilla.

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 Ever wonder what a laser comb looks like?
 Ever wonder what a man who uses a laser comb looks like?
God have mercy on our souls.

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I have a friend who is a cameraman for NBC Sports. He told me that hands down, the Green Bay Packers fans and crew were the nicest in the league. I guess that's what happens when the town owns the team.

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Make of this what you will.
(Onion)

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When we old farts recall "The Good Old Days," this is what we are talking about.

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My wife finally shaved her legs and donated it to Locks of Love.


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Rather powerful anti-smoking ad.

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These stairs have slots to make it easy for you to bring your bike up and down them.

Somehow that looks rather dangerous for people on their mobile devices.

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A pregnant pause is like a regular pause but it doesn't have a period.


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I have heard so much bullshit about the origin of the word 'fuck'. But with these very similar words, I think the argument is over.

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 I wonder how big a problem this is? And anyone who questions the privileged class advantage, just remember that poor students can't afford this.

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We should all take a moment to thank the graffiti artists for decorating your city for free.
Doesn't she look pleased?

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 Add butane to a bottle of Coke, get a totally unsafe high-powered bottle rocket


It's always the Russians, beating us in the never-ending arms race of Totally Unsafe Things That Are Fun to Watch.


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There are so many odd things about this, I don't even know where to start.
Seriously. What the fuck?

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My wife once ran water on a slice of pizza to cool it off. And that was AFTER she stopped drinking.


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2 comments:

Anonymous said...

The guy with Cola is actually Ukrainian, not Russian. He had to escape the region of Ukraine occupied by russians. I just have watched a TV show with this guy yesterdam. I guess he wouldn't like to be called russian.

Ralph Henry said...

sorry

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